Hi there! ^^

This is the final chapter. It's churned up while I was on the plane. ¬.¬ I tried my level best to give this fic a decent closure but it still felt a little incomplete either ways, therefore I apologise for any disappointment that might arise as a result. I might add an epilogue if what I'm currently writing is readable enough.  

Thank you all for your support towards this fic despite its many flaws and explicit contents! It was as fun to write as it was fun to read all your sweet comments! Thank you for the subscribes too! 非常感谢大家的支持！

See you guise around in abit! Have a nice day! ^^ V

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Two weeks later...

“Good evening Halmeoni! Where’s Hongbin?” Taking off his boots as he stumbles clumsily into the spacious single storey hanok, Wonshik greeted Hongbin’s grandmother while she sat at the porch sorting out the laundry.

The old lady immediately got up to get Wonshik some water to drink while the young man wandered into the washing area to clean off the grit on his hands. He is family and strolling around the place is a habit he had developed over the years. After all, all of their houses are of the same style in the neighbourhood and it is not difficult for him to find whatever he needed around the house.

Except, it is getting harder and harder to find Hongbin nowadays. Jaehwan had gotten Hongbin back onto his feet. Sort of. Hongbin is more willing to hang around strangers now and though he is no longer the blithe young man he used to be, no one is ever the same after the harrowing war. Hongbin is not expected to revert back to his normal state of mind.

Nevertheless, he had gone back to work and is busy with life. Enough to distract him from what had happened to him over the course of the past war. The health care sector is a mess and facing a crisis with a lack of manpower. Winter is just around the corner and the available resources are spread thin. The country is in the process of picking itself up and so are the citizens.

Wonshik is busy training more new recruits in standby for the possibility of a new attack. He had started dating Jaehwan as well and Hongbin would always feel bad for taking up their personal time. He does not believe his current mental state requires any help but since Wonshik feels the need for him to undergo psychiatric evaluation and treatment, he will play along.

Escaping to a secluded area near the border everyday after work, Hongbin did not mind the long travelling time and always ensured he got to watch the sun set before returning home. Through this method, he is able to feel closer to Taekwoon. Today is no different. Digging a bullet out of a man who was accidentally shot near the border, Hongbin is once again reminded of Taekwoon.

Taking out a pen as well as a notepad, Hongbin started to jolt down his thoughts once more. He had been writing to Taekwoon pretty often and Wonshik would volunteer to send the letters for him. Yet Hongbin knew deep down inside that those letters were most probably discarded. He found a part of it in the trash can under Jaehwan’s office table. He is under observation and it felt terrible to be judged by his own best friend.

Wonshik and Jaehwan are obviously trying to help him, making him forget about Taekwoon. However, nothing is working. Not hypnotherapy. Not memory suppression therapies. No amount of sharing or counselling sessions seemed to help.

“Dear Mr Kidnapper,

    I saw a man with a bullet in the leg again today. He was in a lot of pain. How is your wound? Please get the stitches removed soon. They are only supposed to stay on for two weeks.

Ps: Ravi and Jaehwan hyung. I need this letter mailed so please don’t throw this one away.”

Not bothering to seal the envelope, Hongbin knows the couple will definitely peek but it does not matter anymore. As long as they would mail his instructions to Taekwoon. He had purposely left out all the lovey-dovey contents just so they would think his condition is improving. However, he is still missing Taekwoon a whole lot. Taekwoon still appeared in his dreams. He still cared a whole lot about how well Taekwoon is doing.

It’s a unfathomable thought even to him, pertaining to why he would even want to stay by Taekwoon’s side. He had often toyed with thought of leaving his family and friends so that he could be with Taekwoon. It did not make sense that he would want that. Taekwoon was mean to him. So very cruel. Why on earth would he want to be by his side?

He does not blame Wonshik for thinking that he is crazy. Or Jaehwan for trying to figure out his warped mentality. However, he is not crazy. He had never been more lucid and sure of what he wanted. He is so drawn to Taekwoon that being separated felt like a part of him is missing. He felt empty and the crater Taekwoon had left in his heart is not closing.

Reading Taekwoon’s letter for the umpteenth time, Hongbin folded it gently and slipped it into his wallet carefully. Lying down on the soft grass and allowing the rays from the dying sun to warm his cool cheeks, Hongbin imagined what Taekwoon would be doing at this moment. Cooking? The man was good at it. Eating? The man was good at that too.

Curling up into a ball on his side, Hongbin imagined Taekwoon lying behind him like how he would many a times. Especially in the cellar. Hongbin missed the warmth. As much as Taekwoon is not the gentlest person, unlike how Wonshik is gentle to Jaehwan, he is undoubtedly an incredibly sensitive person who had a keen sense. He always made sure Hongbin had enough to eat, wear and even do. Despite obviously lacking in the lover department, he is Taekwoon and that was what made him so special. One of a kind.

Their relationship was one of a kind. He missed Taekwoon terribly. Would he go back if he were given a choice? At the expense of his family and friends? His answer is a resounding yes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day went by in a flash. Treating ill kids and adults alike, Hongbin ended his shift later than usual. An influx of the sick accompanied the colder season but at least he is worn out enough to overlook the nagging pain and feeling of longing in the depth of his heart.

Hitching the last chartered bus ride home since he is intending to skip Jaehwan’s session, Hongbin got off a few streets shy of his actual stop. At least Wonshik would get to spend more time with his partner and not end up lonely and miserable like him.

The night is freezing but he liked how it can help to clear his head. He didn’t use to like the cold but now he liked it. The biting wind caressing his numbed cheeks. Pulling the thick coat tighter around his shivering frame, Hongbin trudged on slowly.

His grandmother would probably be up waiting for his return and he feels bad for making her wait, but he cannot afford to let her see him looking so downcast. At least he can practice smiling while he took the long rather aimless walk back.

Turning into the alley headed towards his residence after a good thirty minutes, Hongbin could not shake off the feeling of being stalked and hastened his footsteps. His mother had warned him about staying out late since there is an increased risk of being robbed during tumultuous times like this. This is the first time he is feeling uneasy either ways and he blames it on exhaustion.

Spotting a moving shadow cast along the snow laden ground a metre from the turn he is headed for, Hongbin stopped in his tracks and took a detour. There is only one shadow after all and Hongbin believes he can outrun the person if he is given a head start.

The owner of the shadow seem to be able to sense his distress and a tall silhouette emerges from within the darkness, coming at him. This is cue for Hongbin to turn and run. The heavy footsteps in pace with his own fast ones indicated that he is being chased.

Skidding a couple of times, Hongbin did not pay heed to where he is headed and ended up stumbling onto the frozen river just behind his neighbourhood. Spinning around to check if he had successfully lost his pursuer, Hongbin heaved a sign of relief on noting that he is no longer being tailed.

However, just as he is done catching his frosty breath and about to return via the route he had taken, a pair of hands had wound themselves around his torso. Pulling him in the opposite direction.

Letting out a terrified squeak, mostly because he is stunned, Hongbin tried to shove the person off but to no avail. Tightening his vice-like grip, the person started to drag him along with more force. Digging his feet into the sheet of ice lining the surface of the water, Hongbin broke it unintentionally.

The immediate surrounding gave way as well and he ended up half submerged with the person behind now holding onto him instead of trying to harm him. Twisting and turning around as he struggles to climb out from the watery hole with increasing desperation, Hongbin failed miserably with the slippery surfaces. Left with no other choice, he reached backwards to hang onto the sleeves covering a muscular pair of arms.

“Shhhhhh. I’ve got you.” Feeling himself being hauled out of the water and into a tight back hug, Hongbin contemplated scratching at the unidentified person behind him but froze on hearing a hearty chuckle emitted from behind his head.

“Lively aren’t you?” The voice blowing warm air softly into his ear sounded so familiar it sounded foreign. If that made any sense at all.

Going limp, Hongbin allowed the person behind to support him under his armpits and transfer him to where the ice is thicker. The sudden bout of unexplainable weakness plaguing him is possibly due to the cardiac dysrhythmia he is suffering from at the moment. His heart is at his throat and he feels faint just convincing himself that he knows exactly who is behind him.

He might be wrong. That voice and familiar grip might just be his imagination. He would be in grave danger if that were the case but his limbs are not cooperating. 

“Cute.” The person behind added softly and Hongbin gasped. Turning his head with much difficulty, Hongbin simply stared at the tall shadow. Not sure where exactly to look first but eager to take in everything all at once.

The moon did him a small favour by illuminating the man’s face and Hongbin is kept fixated. Pupils travelling around parts of the devilishly handsome face while his eyes turns glassy, Hongbin’s body moved on its own. Holding onto Taekwoon tightly for dear life, Hongbin could not stop the tears from flowing.

Taekwoon seemed a little taken aback by his fervid response but indulged him anyway. Hongbin is wailing like a small child by now, snot dripping as he sneezes adorably between sobs.

Drying the cold tears from under his eye bags gently with a thumb, Taekwoon even cleaned off the half frozen dried mucus from under his nostril with a sleeve. “I was so afraid you wouldn’t want to see me.” Taekwoon whispered.

“First things first.” Embracing the shuddering young man, Taekwoon tilted Hongbin’s face upwards and pasted their lips together.

Letting go of Hongbin as soon as they are done with the passionate kiss, Taekwoon was only intending to remove his own coat for Hongbin but the latter responded by clinging onto him tightly. Refusing to let go as he wraps his arms around Taekwoon’s waist, Hongbin whined when the man plucked him off anyway.

Stripping off his coat and wrapping Hongbin with it carefully, Taekwoon held on tightly to his hands. Leading him out of the thin ice zone and onto safety of the banks. Hongbin loved how Taekwoon’s hands are still so warm and big. Admiring Taekwoon’s back view as he leads them up the steps and towards the same neighbourhood he was running from earlier, Hongbin’s eyes never left the broad shoulders beneath the thick knitted sweater.

Wherever Taekwoon is headed, he wants to follow. Not as a pet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Arriving at a small residence just a street from Hongbin’s home and entering the furthest room at the end of the corridor, Taekwoon slid open the door soundlessly and Hongbin entered willingly. Even without Taekwoon telling him to do so.

Sitting happily in the middle of the room, Taekwoon wanted to laugh at how Hongbin is behaving like a gleeful idiot. Grabbing his own set of clothes and towel from inside the small cupboard, Taekwoon ushered Hongbin over. The younger man immediately got down to changing out of his wet clothes like a well behaved child.

Then, crawling over to Taekwoon’s side and lying in front of him, Hongbin rested his head on Taekwoon’s good thigh. He liked this reality with Taekwoon right in front of him. Grabbing onto a part of Taekwoon shirt in fear of the man disappearing on him again, Hongbin continued to observe Taekwoon with wide doe eyes.

“Lee Hongbin... can we start over?” Taekwoon asked softly, hands carding through Hongbin’s hair. Hongbin bobbled his head up and down anxiously in agreement.

“Let’s start from the beginning. I’m Jung Taekwoon.” The ex-officer spoke with an overly sincere voice and Hongbin giggled, dimples sinking in deep as he fiddled with the hem of Taekwoon’s shirt. This is one of the rare few occasions where Hongbin would smile so brightly in front of him and he loved it.

Nevertheless, seeing that Hongbin is not exactly answering him, Taekwoon got onto all fours and hovered over the younger person. “Remember, before you leave me again, kill me first. Spare me the torture.” He whispered into Hongbin’s ear.

“I can’t leave even if I wanted to. You’ll have to set me free first.” Hongbin whispered and rolled onto his side, averting his eyes coyly. His voice in perfect harmony with the soothing silence of the room. Carrying a humming quality that resonates in Taekwoon’s ears.

“Good.” Taekwoon replied. “What makes you think that will ever happen?"