(The lyrics are in italic and Youngjae's thoughts are in bold.)

Youngjae stood on stage alone.

Originally he wasn’t supposed to - Jaebum, his Jaebum should have been standing next to him, singing the first lines while Youngjae played the piano.

But two days had passed and Jaebum wasn’t there anymore.

The first notes echoed, snapping Youngjae out of reality.

He had just came back from the hospital where Jaebum told him goodbye for the last time. His manager told him not to go on stage but Youngjae wanted to, as a last goodbye to Jaebum.

His Jaebum.

“I still can’t believe it.”

Youngjae’s voice cracked when he sang that first line.

No, I can’t. You’re still here.

“That when I open my eyes, you aren’t there.”

You shouldn’t have left. Why did you leave ?

“When I see it later, even if I empty out all the sad memories.”

I was so happy with you.

“I am always drowned in the thoughts of you.”

Jaebum’s voice echoed in Youngjae’s ears. He didn’t know Jaebum had recorded his parts before leaving.

I still have your shirts, and they smell like you.

“I get exhausted but I look for traces of you again.”

I’m tired, so tired. I want you here. I need you here.

“You have to stay well, don’t even get sick.”

Why didn’t you follow my words when I told you to see a doctor ?

“The way you smile, don’t ever lose that.”

I can’t believe I’ll never see you smiling again.

“If it ever gets hard, you can come back to me.”

Jaebum’s part again. Why did it feel like a real conversation between them to Youngjae ?

Can I ? Even if you’re the reason of my pain ?

“I am here, like always, here for you.”

You’re not.

“I will never leave.”

Youngjae could hear Jaebum’s voice breaking while singing this line. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to hold his tears in.

You did. You lied.

I need you. Come back...

“I’m waiting for you.”

Youngjae’s voice answered Jaebum’s without him noticing.

“Through you, everything changed for me.”

You changed me.

“Since you are not here, I can’t do anything, I can’t even forget you.”

Why aren’t you coming back ?

“Even though how hard I try, you are getting further away.”

COME BACK.

“I again, trust that you will return to me.”

Should I follow you ?

“Why ?”

WHY ?

“Come back to me please, no matter how long it takes.”

I want to see you…

“I will never leave.”

Good bye...

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

I'll be honest, I nearly cried writing this.

It was inspired by Youngjae's performance of the song 1:31am he was supposed to sing with Jaebum.

I cried watching the vid, I cried reading the lyrics, I cry every time I think of it.

I know it's the second 2Jae in two days, but they hurt me so much I need to deliver myself from my feels.

I'm going to wash away my tears.

Bye for now :)