one day Por and Card decided to round up the cheer club for a day at the mall. Pete declined, without giving a reason. Earn joined the team, figuring he needed a break.

they were eating at the Oishi buffet in siam paragon when the boys spotted Pete and Yuri coming out of the cinema.

“looks like we  were dumped for Yuri. hahaha.” Card says to Por.

Earn acts like he saw nothing. inside, he remembers the last time he came out of the  same cinema. Pete was with him. there it hit him. what he didn’t want to admit to himself all this time. Earn no longer mattered to Pete. all this time since pharmacamp he had acted cool around pete thinking pete would come around if he acted normal, like nothing happened. but its been months since pharmacamp and all this time he’s been spending it with Yuri.

“i don’t think he dumped us. just  earn. i’m still friends with Pete, “ Por says to Card with a chuckle.

Earn stayed silent the rest of the meal. shortly after that the group broke up for the day. earn decided to walk around and do some window shopping before going up the BTS.

he was at the food court when he saw a lady drop a bag. he picked it up and ran after the lady. 

“ hey miss, you dropped your… (earn looks at the bag) cuttlefish.”

after handing the cuttlefish back to the lady , earn remembered the cuttlefish noh gave him which he thought was a special present, only for him to realize later on noh brought cuttlefish from hua hin for all his friends. he also remembered how Pete and he fought over it. he dropped his shoulders and took a cab home.

back in school days later, Earn had to face one for the first time, by himself, an “evil” which he and Pete used to face together. a math exam. normally he and pete would spend days and nights at each other’s houses studying. their dynamic benefitted them both because they always kept each other in check when they felt like slacking off.

this was the first exam he without Pete by his side. 

1 day later, grades came back. Earn actually aced it.

he was so happy and so relieved he instintively reached out for his phone to dial pete’s number to share the news with him. he was already about to hit send when he remembered, they’re no longer friends.

earn tried to celebrate on his own by going to the cafeteria when the smell of squid filled the air. and again a memory with pete came back. all those times they shared squid. earn tried to perish the memory by buying chicken and eating by his lonesome, while enjoying the high grade he just got. while he was grinning his eyes had a bit of sadness in them.

he was in this state of affairs when he heard a voice he hasn’t heard in a while. 

“you seem happy.”

earn looked up. its noh.

“oh hi noh. how have you been? where’s phun?”

noh was surprised. this was the first time earn even looked for Phun. while Phun and earn never really got close, it was only because of Noh that things got tense between the, before Noh, Phun and Earn had a cordial work relationship as secretary of the student council and president of the cheer club.

“he’s coming. glad to see youre in a good mood.”

“who wouldn’t be?” earn flashed the math exam to noh.

“woah! glad to see youre doing well. i haven’t seen you in a while. where have you been”

“oh ive just been busy with studies and cheer club. i wouldnt get this grade right if i had been slacking off.”

“woah good going  earn.” phun walks up from behind noh.

“thank you guys wanna sit and share the table?”

noh and phun joins earn. noh and phun never told anyone about themselves. but they didn’t really care whoever saw them. phun put his arm around noh but noh pushed it away.

“its okay guys. you can be yourselves around me.” earn said with a smile.

“told you he’s moved on.” phun said to noh.

“well im oblivious to these things.” noh replied.

“youre oblivous to everything.” earn said.

all three boys laughed.

“well i did notice that you havent been anywhere near noh since pharmacamp. not that i’m complaining.” Phun said with a chuckle.

Noh smacked Phun’s head.

“well that can be arranged.” Earn shoots back at Phun, teasing.

Noh smacks both earn’s and phun’s heads. they all laugh.

“but we’re glad to see youre fine.” noh says.

“too bad you had to lose Pete in the process.” Phun adds, to be followed by a yelp after Noh smacked his head again.

“yeah. pete…” earn said as he looked away. “wait. how did you know? did he say anything?”

“oh please. everybody knows. it’s like Noh and I. “ Phun says with a smirk.

“have you tried to talk to him about it?’ Noh asked.

“Pete said it’s over between us.” earn said.

“what exactly is us?” Phun asked.

“I lost my best friend. and it’s my fault i think.” Earn said.

“what happened?” said Noh.

Earn tells them about the pharma camp fight

“oh earn. I let Yuri go because I love Phun.  you shouldnt have done that.” Noh said.

“and you really had no business telling him to choose between you and yuri when you didn’t even want to tell him about how you felt about noh.” phun said.

Earn could only sigh. “i tried to distract myself by keeping busy  but it just gets worse. he’s still physically close to me every day but it’s like he’s not even there anymore. i really miss him. and it doesn’t help that everytime i’m near him my heart feels like its gonna beat out of my chest. so fast like…”

and earn gets a flashback to that day he almost told Pete about noh—when he talked of how his heart beats so fast everytime he’s near the person he likes.

“like…?”

“like how you felt for noh before?” Phun asks, only to cut by another yelp after Noh smacks his head again.”

Earn laughs. “ something like that…just…more “ and all his memories of Pete from the day they first met comes back rushing to him.  before he knew it, tears were rolling down his eyes. he never cried over noh even if it depressed him to lose noh to Phun.  but he is crying over pete now. he just felt numb all over. like the energy left the building. he just shut down. earn was so down Phun and Noh had to drive him home because they  didn’t want to leave him like that. Earn said nothing during the brief ride . when he got home he could only wave thank you to his friends.

earn made his way to his room. but as soon as he got in, the memory of the last time pete was in there came back. when Pete slipped several times that he liked him. and earn said he doesn’t like him.

“if only i could go back in time and change everything.” earn thought to himself, while slumped on the floor, thinking of Pete.