A/N: slightly shorter chap update, but I might just update again later today if i can get the rest of my info right!!! 

This is a flashback, keep that in mind :) and as always I love feedback! Enjoy~~~~

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A month ago (Jiyong's POV)

I took another swig from my beer bottle as I scrolled down some articles. There was loud music playing, and lights flashing everywhere, but they didn't bother me anymore. Why are there so many people in this section?

"Yah, Jiyong! You should be celebrating another successful concert and photo session. Let go of the phone for a moment." Youngbae came over and nudged me playfully. "Just let loose a little tonight. You haven't been yourself lately."

I haven't been myself for years actually.

"Jiyong?"

I shook my head and smiled sheepishly. "I think something might have not settled well in my stomach. I'll go back to the hotel, I'll see you tomorrow?" I ran a hand through my hair as I stood up, gathering my things.

"Again? We better take you to the hospital soon then." Youngbae laughed and pulled me into a loose embrace. "Ji? Just remember, she will be fine. Chaerin said she did well in the concerts, so you need to relax a little. They have it covered." 

"I'll see you later." I look down and make my way out of the club. It seemed to be especially packed that day, and the best way out was through the back. I didn't mind since this had been a regular occurence as of late and I was getting used to finding quick routes out of places. 

A car was waiting out for me and I double checked no one had followed me there before slipping inside. Once in, I greeted the cool dark interior and melted into the seat. I had to keep composure on my face until we got there. 

Just 15 more minutes

I glanced at my phone again. No new messages.

10 more minutes

I go on instagram and just look up random pictures just to pass time.

5 more minutes

I started to tap the door handle to the rhythm of the music playing. I just wanted to get there already. I felt ready to burst.

Finally

I thanked the driver and made my way over to my room. A set of sunglasses kept my eyes hiddned and I hoped to get back with no interruptions. I felt too suffocated by being constantly asked to entertain. 

After taking more security precations, wating what seemed like an eternity for the elevator, and walking all the way down a hall way I fianlly arrived. I walked to my bedroom and threw my hat, sunglasses and keys on it. There was a bottle of perfectly aged wine hidden between my bed and bedside table and I didn't hesitate on getting out. 

Maybe tonight I would only have one bottle.

Since we were sharing a suite, I took all the snacks and glasses to my room and locked the door. Who knew when everyone would come back? I sprawled out on the bed and flipped through the channels. Nothing on tv seemed interesting enough. The bottle was opened and soon I was downing my first glass. I had only had one beer at the club, so no there were no effects yet. 

Drinking alone had become my habbit as of late. It started maybe a year ago? Whenever it was that I had come to realize I was alone. 

Most would think that being one of the top people industry secured you friends, money and fame right? Not really, but two out of three wasn't bad. Everone wants you for your fame and money, and everyone else suddenly finds you too intimidating to go near you, or simply forgets. 

I served another glass and opened a bag of fruit that I had taken from Seunghyun's stash. why not be a little classy? At least for myself.

I kept flipping through the channels and found a news station that was talking about us. 

When had we grown so apart? 

Everyone had their own independent projects for the most part. Daesung was always promoting in Japan, and Seungri was being MC or god-knows-what. I never worried over those two. They never poked too much into my life, and I didn't have to ask too much from them. We were almost the same as we had always been. 

Seunghyun had his movies, but he would cut himself off from the world for months at a time. He had been someone who I would go to about anything, since he was one of my closest hyungs, and understood me in levels few did. Ever since he did Alumni though, he's been different. He's been a slump that he refused to get out of unless it was by himself. I only invite him over for dinner as of late.

Youngbae, he was far more different than Seunghyun. We had been close even since debut. We trained together for years and watched each other grow. Once I got busier with composing and planning my own solo career he suddenly stopped talking to me as much. He just seemed to have given up on me. After he started dating in secret it only got worse. There are times when he has asked me to come over and everything was fine, but it's not as often as I would like. 

I wonder if fans ever realize that I'm not kidding when I mention this during interviews. I really don't have any close friends. I drink alone, I compose alone, and I have learned to stand on my own. 

My hands shook a little as I poured the next glass. Nothing interesting was on. I was about to turn off the tv when something caught my attention. A new show suddenly started and the first thing they metioned was her.

Park Bom

I had been there when the news broke out, but she was rushed away and then she had concerts to attend to. She was being awfully quiet.

Bommie noona...

Nights like these brought me back to thoughts of her. She had been my closest friend and my first love. 

I sent her another text, asking where she was, and like always, I got no answer. 

I laughed at myself and finished the drink. Now that I thought about it, this was the first major thing that she had been accussed of after the plastic surgery. She knew how to stay quiet and away from the press. Just like me. 

I looked at my phone again and looked up her name once again. I had been reading articles for the past few weeks. I needed to figure out how to go about this. 

She had told me about her problem years ago. The tragedy that had left her broken years ago refused to disapear and she was desperate to find a way out. She cried when the first medications she received in Korea didn't work. I had invited her to spend a week over at the dorm so she wouldn't feel so alone. I still remembered how she would get flustered when one of the guys would walk in shirtless. 

I'm almost done with my next glass and I started to shake with rage as the reporter starts calling Bom a disgrace to the community. 

My fingers started to suddenly dial her number and of course it sent me to voice mail.

"Noonaaaaa," my words were a little slurred. "D-don't worry. Your Jiyonggie is going to come back and save you. You'll seeeee." I giggled and gulped down more wine. 
"We can be alone together."