Fears. Rants.
Fears. They’re not a huge thing to me. They are my goals. To be much more scarier and powerful than them. to become stronger.
1. Oblivion
2. Falling in Love
3. Large water areas
4. The Grudge (Japanese Myth, Japanese Horror Film)
Moving onto my rants. There's nothing really to rant about lately. I skipped school today. by accident. not sure If that makes sense. I know I ahve no excuse. I don't know how to tell my teachers why I didn't come today. School is almost over and I'm barely close to finishing my 2 subjects, I'm frustrated.
I'm not sure If I'm going to be having exams. I'm on hiatus on twitter because I really need to focus on school right now. I also stopped reading which had a huge impact on my life. It's like that. Some months I'm focused on reading, some I'm catching up on dramas, and running man, and other variety shoes. Lately I've been watching The suspicious Housekeeper and Roomate. I'm also finally caught up on Running Man recently. I guess that's why I barely had the time to open a book I havem't finished yet.
Elisa has got me interested in wanting to read Hannibal series. I shall go book hunting soon. ah! B.A.P's comeback was last night~ Of course I was there during the mention party. Too be truly honest (Warning: I'm unecessarily too honest) the song wasn't my style. But that's alright because I don't have to like the song. I love B.A.P in general. B.A.P is just slipping off my mind of becoming my ultimate bias group. the fandom is becoming to mainstream and annoying. I could always move to the exo fandom and become a total asswipe with worser fans. I could always go back to becoming a suju acc. or a b1a4 acc.
It's just been bothering me lately because EXO has stole my heart so much that I barely have the time for B.A.P since they've recently ended their tour instead of promoting in Korea. What I find sad the most is that they haven't had their tour here in Canada yet so I can't fall in love with them more and more again. Or maybe I'm just selfish. I'm a fake fan. I admit it. I've been their fan since Bang&Zelo debuted. I can admit I've gotten tired of them and that they've grown up so fast and they've lost so many fans but they're so successful and I'm so proud of them today.\
I'm originally SMTOWN biased. I found out about Super Junior in 2008? They were the first boy group I found about in K-Pop. I could always go back. Would that make me an to babyz? I don't even know why I'm like this. What am I afraid of? Judgement? Idk. You guys judge me and give me some advice. That would be helpful.
Anyways, moving onto the next topic: My Health Status. Haha, not so good. so I've shortened 2cm. And I've gained 10 pounds. I don't even eat unhealthy food alot. That could be a lie because I don't know myself. I'm so dissappointed in myself because of my weight.
But you know I'm confident and I have self-respect. I'm just dissappointed that I gained weight. T_____T
Well then. Should I end it here? Sorry if there are spelling msitakes I'm too lazy to go back and check right now. Please continue to read and comment on my fics. I hope I can continue to write on here. Please follow my twitter! @choijpg
Just trust yourself. If your friends are being asses, it's alright to runaway and go to a different school or even move without giving them a reason or saying goodbye. Why? Because this is where I am and I've done it. Grow up honey and be mature. This is the real world. This is the reality and I'm so sorry but we can't do anything about it. The world is a disaster even on the sunniest days baby.
If you're getting into peer pressure please change schools and if you can move away from those people. You have another chance. You can change your image. I can promise you that your stress will decrease after the storm. Because I have. just hang in there. Save as much money as you can. Stay close to things that make you feel alive. Whether it's supporting your oppa, going to a concert, needing to finish that episode of your kdrama, finishing up that fanfic you started to read, just please hang in there with me.
--Kyu
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