"Kyuhyun!!!! Clean up your room!!!"

Story by: Myendless

Review by: StarlightTango

Title: 3/10

It is never good to use more than one puncuation. In your title you used...seven? It's kind of a turn off for me because you can already tell what type of story this is going to be like. But i must give you credit for the title grabbing attention. Even though from your title you already told your entire plot. The quotes on the title was also just a bit weird.

Description/Foreword: 2/15

I think you might have messed up on the description/foreword. What you write under the description wasn't where it's suppose to be. It should have been in the foreword. And your foreword stuff would have fit in the description better. The description is a place for you to tell your readers a little bit about your story to make them interested. I didn't know anything about your story from what you wrote in the description.

Overall Look: 4/5

I had no problem with the way your story looks. You didnt have a post or background so i can't judge on that. But i took off a point because it was kind of plain, and unattractive.

Grammar: 5/30

Hm..I wonder if english is your first language. Your grammar could use some more work. Make sure to leave spaces after each sentence, and learn how to correctly use a comma. Another thing is to please don't use so many periods in a sentence. (Ex: But......) It's not really attractive. Also it's better that you don't use RW: or KH: when your writing. Your grammar isn't the worst that i've seen, but it can still be better. 

Spelling: 20/20

Im glad to say that i didn't find any spelling errors! Yay!

Flow: 12/15

You just went a little fast for me. Slow it down a bit, and write more. Describe each scene, and elaborate more. I feel like if you explained more the readers could understand your story a bit better. 

Originality: 4/5

It was fun to read! Seems fresh, and funny also! I liked reading the story.

Total: 50/100