Photogenic Perfection

Story By: ParadiseWithINFINITE

Review By: StarlightTango

Title: 7/10

It wasn't bad, but it wasn't good either. It doesn't attract my attention, and when i first glanced at it, the title didn't make me want to click on the story. But i did like how you had the two 'p'. It makes it sound more 'wow'. Overall, i would say its not amazing, but it's not horrible. Just an okish title.

Foreword: 11/15

I liked how your description grabbed my interest. But i think you revealed too much of the plot. You almost told us everything that was going to happen, and i didn't think i needed to read the rest of the story anymore. I did like the quote though. It was a nice touch!

Overall Look: 3/5

The poster was nice, but the color and fonts were just too much. There also wasn't a background. Which isn't necessary, but would make it look better.

Grammar: 29/30

Your grammar is really good. I didn't find any major mistakes. Just make sure to put commas before all of your conjunctions. Other then that, there isn't anything else.

Spelling: 20/20

Nothing. Nope. Didn't find any. But i wasn't really expecting any either. Good job!

Flow: 12/15

I know that it's a one-shot, but it went by so fast for me. You did write a lot, but i would have liked more about their interaction with each other. Also, if you could have written more about Suho, like how you wrote about Lay, that also would have better. I did like how you used a lot of details in your writing. It made things seem more real, and made me really get into your story.

Originality: 4/5

I love this! It was fresh, and new! The plot was interesting, and i really liked it.

Total: 86/100