2064 w
​angst, slice of life, light romance

There are a lot of things she can't stand; like Chanhyuk's nosiness, Junhong's inferior complex, the smell of pine trees and cigarettes and bleach or even how people talk with their mouths full. She can't tolerate those kinds of stuff, it's maddening.

One thing she absolutely despises above all is the dark. She's not afraid of it, that's what she tells herself at least but she knows deep down it's true. She's not afraid, she just hates it.

Hayi used to sleep at Hanbin's when her mother took the night shift at the hospital and her father would be out of town (he always was) and she'd sleep with the lights on in the living room. Hanbin would be on the floor and she'd be on the couch, and sometimes he'd hold her hand before they fall asleep.

Now that Hayi's bigger, they think she'd get over it but apparently that wasn't the case. Chanhyuk had refused to let her sleep over at his house because he can't sleep even for a minute with the lights on. Hayi doesn't bother to go to Junhong's, because he only lives in a boarding house and they're not allowed to have visitors stay the night.

So Hanbin was the only option; he was always her only option. 

"Do you think I'll luck out tomorrow?"

Hayi hands him his cup of macchiato while she settles for frappucino even though it's 15 degrees outside. She looks to him with a smile.

"I think you'll do great with or without luck."

Hanbin doesn't look at her, just frowns and traces his fingers across the rim of his cup. He's not buying it. Hayi thinks he's like Junhong now with that inferiority complex.

"There'll be a lot of people and a lot of them are better than me."

Hayi places her cup down because she wants to hold his hand in both of her's from across the table.

"You'll do great." 

This time her words are firmer, clearer and he looks up then. Hayi smiles encouragingly and he looks at her as if he's regained a whole new kind of confidence. 

Hanbin had auditioned for a scouting agency and got in three days later. They threw a surprise party which isn't all that surprising since Hanbin already knew from the moment he saw Chanhyuk walk out of a cake store this morning that they were planning something.

They were underage, just seventeen, but they managed to grab hold of some alcohol courtesy of Junhong. Hayi adds soju to the list of things she can't stand. Junhong is drunk and so is Chanhyuk, and Hanbin is barely awake. Hayi fusses over them like a mother hen and throws blankets over their bodies. Tonight they're at Chanhyuk's, and Hayi doubts he'd be minding the lights this time. 

He has other things to worry about, like the hangover that's coming as soon as he wakes up.

When Hayi thought Hanbin was asleep, she thought wrong. He wrestled her down on the carpeted floor and Hayi writhes under his grasp but it's no use, not really. He showers her face with drunk kisses and whispers constantly how he's going to miss her.

Hayi doesn't think about how far Seoul is from their little town. She just sleeps in his arms with the lights on and all is right in the world.

Until it isn't, not anymore. 

Her dad doesn't come home during the blackout. Her mother can't come home from the hospital, she still has a few hours left.

Panting. Wheezing. Knees to the chest. Phone to her ear. Sweat trickling down. Wheezing. Wheezing. It's getting harder for her to breathe. Back against the wall - the wall's so cold. It's so cold. It's so dark. 

"Listen, sweetie, you go out and take a breath of fresh air -" 

It's so dark. It's so dark. She can't see. Wheezing. Panting. Back against the cold, cold wall. Phone to her ear. Knees to her chest, squishing her s. Chin on her knees. She can barely breathe.

"Mo - mo - mom, come - come home. N - n - n - now!"

Sweat trickles down. Cold sweat. Tears trickle down. Hot tears. Her lungs don't function. Her heartbeats are out of this world. The room is spinning. The wall's not there anymore. 

"Honey, honey. Calm down. The flashlight -"

She sobs. "It has no battery! I don't - I can't see anything! The street lamps are out! There is no light! There is - there is - there is no light!"

Hayi sobs for five minutes. Opening her eyes, closing her eyes - debating which one was better because even if she opened them, she still couldn't see anything. The darkness consumes her whole and it's scaring her - it never scared her before.

Then Junhong comes in her house with an emergency light and Hayi wraps her arms around his neck as he helps her up and