15 July 2014

Rainy; 9:00 pm

            Dear diary,

It’s been two months since Fan left. He never call back nor reply to any of my texts. I never saw him at the college anymore. When I went to the administration, they said that he had transferred.

Fan isn’t coming back. It kind of feels weird, everything seems so weird and off. It doesn’t feel the same. I also feel like everyond else is slowly drifting apart.

I’m scared..

Mirae

20 Sept 2014

Months had pass since Yi Fan left. Mirae never got her explanation from the others, neither does he call her or texted her. No one explains.

She felt like the boys had also grew distant, like a fully grown tree that is slowly wilting. Everything seems so wrong. Sehun especially had grew even more quiet than the usual. Jongin tend to get into brawls and came back home with bruises. Baekhyun had also stop joking around with Chanyeol. Jongdae had quiet down his pranks. Yixing had been spending an awful lot of time in the studio.

Kyungsoo also rarely cook and they would usually order take-out. Tao also spent a lot of time in the gym. Luhan is always out and when he came home, she could smell the stink scent of alcohol all over him. Minseok tend to stay inside his room. Junmyeon was the only one trying to bring them together. Mirae is slightly lost in her world and in confusion.

1 Oct 2014

At 3 am in the morning, Mirae was woken up by a pair of arms wrapped firmly around her waist. She could smell that stink scent of alcohol and knew who it was.

“You’re not asleep.” Luhan said.

“You woke me up.” Mirae said and turn around to look at him.

Luhan had pulled her closer as her face was flushed to his chest. It was silent for a couple of minutes when suddenly a sob was heard.

“Are you crying?”

Luhan didn’t answer but hug her tighter and his cries went out. He kept on saying, “I’m so sorry baby girl. I’m sorry. I really am.”

He repeated those words as if it was a chant. Mirae wanted to question him but decided not to and just comfort him until his crying stops and his voice slowly grew softer until he fell asleep.

Mirae find it hard to sleep and think about what is going on. Why is Luhan saying sorry? It was 6 am when Mirae suddenly fall asleep, deep in thought.

Luhan’s eyes flutter open as he look at her. He pulled her closer and whisper, “I’m sorry baby girl.”