I looked at Donghyun, then, my eyes b with tears—out of frustration or hurt I could never really point out. He stared at me with a pleading expression. From the way his mouth slightly trembled, I knew that he, too, was struggling to fight back the sobs stuck in his throat.

“While I understand why you’re being like this,” I began in the calmest voice I could muster. “Don’t you think you’re going overboard, Donghyun-ah? I’m hurting, too.”

He narrowed his eyes at me. “Hurting? Hurting?!” he scoffed. “Then I guess that’s a good thing. Now do you know, Shin Hye, how I feel?” he faced the taxi driver, and said in English, “Please start the car.”

“Not yet,” I snapped. I turned to Donghyun again. “If you’re going to be like this then why did you bring me here in Belfast in the first place? If you’re going to make things difficult then why did you allow me to meet up with Yonghwa? Everything was okay back then, Donghyun, and you know it!” I heaved out a faltering sigh—the thick and defeated kind. “You were doing fine, I was doing fine…we were doing fi—”

“Stop lying,” he seethed. I swallowed, and for a moment, all that could be heard was the soft rain hitting against the window. Things stayed still; the driver was glancing at us through the rearview mirror with a concerned look on his face. “I’ve watched you all this time, Shin Hye, and I came to know that you’re in your best position if Yonghwa is with you. Stop lying to me, stop lying to yourself.”

“D-Donghyun—”

“I’ve accepted that fact a long time ago,” he carried on, his voice cracking with every word he tried so hard to choke out. “But that didn’t stop me from attempting to win you over. Again and again, I always come out second despite the fact that your best friend forgot you and I was there when you needed him the most,” Donghyun looked at me now, and a single tear fell from his right eye, traveling all the way down his cheek, leaving a silver and painful trail of hurt. “Don’t I get any credit for that, Shin Hye-yah? Now the both of you are so comfortable with each other even if you only saw each other again a couple of days ago. Tell me, Shin Hye-yah, where should I stand now?”

I couldn’t find the strength to answer his question or to even reply, for that matter.

“I prepared myself for this,” he said. “But why does it still hurt here?” he thumped his fist against his chest twice.

“Are you’s two all right?” the taxi driver asked with sincerity. “You’re not in a fight, are you?”

I opened my mouth to reply, but I was cut off by someone knocking against the window. I looked at the person. It was Mina.

“Go,” Donghyun quietly said. “I’ll head home first.”

“But—”

“I said go,” he pushed.

I bit my lower lip, gave him one last look, and stepped out of the car. In an instant, the taxi zoomed away. From where I stood, I could’ve sworn Donghyun lowered his head—a sign that he was crying. The rain was much softer now. Mina had her hood up and she was carrying the clothes I left in Yonghwa’s room. She looked at me from head to foot, and said, “Change first, and then let’s have coffee somewhere else.”

<:>

The cup was warm against my palm and the aroma was tempting. However, I couldn’t sip even for once. How could I, considering that Shin Mina, a classmate from back then and the one Yonghwa had a puppy crush on, was sitting right in front of me not in Korea, but in Belfast, instead?

“It’s really a surprise to see you here,” she began in a casual tone paired with a winning smile. “And in Yonghwa’s room, on top of that. I’m happy.”

I looked at her with a knowing stare before returning the smile she gave me. “I never expected you to fly all the way here to Belfast just to cheer on Yonghwa, too.”

“Why not? He’s my best friend, after all,” she deflected. It took me some willpower to stop myself from rolling my eyes and throwing the cup I was holding at her. “Shin Hye-yah, you’ve gotten prettier.”

“Sly as ever, I see,” I remarked on impulse.

Mina cleared to ward off the intense silence while I stirred my coffee with a silver teaspoon.

“I’m not going to stall anymore,” she began, eyeing at me intently. She leaned in a little closer. “What did you and Yonghwa do?”

“Why does it matter to you?” I shot back. Truth be told, I was never this kind of girl. I could never pull out the strength to make any comebacks but it was different at that time. Everything inside me was messed up and Mina barged in like a storm, worsening what I felt with her questions. “What’s with the fear in your voice, Mina-yah? Are you afraid that Yonghwa will pick up? Are you afraid that he’ll remember me?”

“No,” she bluffed. “It’s just that it’s an important time for him. If something triggers his memories, then he won’t be able to perform. He’s an artist now, with an image to protect. And you wearing his clothes and playing with him out in the open won’t be good for his career.”

I looked at her straight in the eye, then. “Are you really worried about his career, Mina?” I asked. “Or are you just intimidated because I’m around once again?”

“W-Why would I be?” she blurted out. Her face was turning pale by the second and I would be lying if I said that I didn’t enjoy it.

“While studying in London, I had a project which concerned company slogans,” I began with a smile and a spark in my eyes. “I came across Coca-Cola’s slogan back in 1991. It says: Can’t beat the real thing.”

She swallowed, and my grin grew wider. “All I’m saying, Mina-yah,” I continued. “Is that you shouldn’t try so hard to protect a position that was never yours from the very beginning,” I stood up from my seat before giving her a final smile. “I’ll be taking my leave. I’ll see you at the concert.”

I was already a few steps away from the door when she called my name. I looked back, and there she was, standing, with her fists shaking. “Don’t brew things up anymore, Shin Hye-yah, I’m begging you,” she said. “Yonghwa’s okay now. Can’t you leave him alone?”

“But I wasn’t the one who orchestrated these things,” I pointed out with a tiny smile.

“Still,” she bargained. “Don’t take Yonghwa away from me. Please.”

I looked up at the ceiling and swallowed the lump already forming in my throat before approaching her. “He isn’t yours, Mina,” I said in a gentle voice. “And he’s not mine, either.”

She shot me a look, and a pang of pain swept over me when tears began to emerge from her wide, clear eyes. Her eyelashes clumped together; her cheeks became pink, together with her already quivering lips. “Then,” she choked out in a thick voice. “Just stay away from him for the time being.”

I stepped back. Shook my head slowly. “I can’t do that, Mina.”

“Why not?!” she whined, making some of the customers’ heads turn in our direction. “Shin Hye, let’s move on with our lives. You’re not his friend anymore! You weren’t there when he got hospitalized that weekend! You weren’t there when he was crying out of frustration! You weren’t there when he was at his lowest!”

I shot her a look, which sent her shoulders to rise up a little. I sighed, and said, “Come with me,” I didn’t wait for her reply. Taking her by the arm, I dragged her out of the shop and we stood under the drizzle. “Let’s talk here, Mina.”

She bit her lower lip, and glanced at me, not saying anything.

“I wasn’t there for him back then, I admit,” I began. “But do you think I can help it? Mina, how old was I back then? I missed Yonghwa so much, too. I was never told about his condition until I called him. Do you know how much it hurts hearing from your best friend that he doesn’t remember you? While doing the happy things in London, I inevitably thought about him, thinking that things were more enjoyable if he was around. I wasn’t with him physically, I know that already!” I swallowed back my tears, and I looked at her with an unwavering stare. “But my heart was always with him.”

With this, she casted her eyes down on the soaked concrete ground. She carried on biting her lips and tears kept on streaming down her face.

“While I wasn’t with him at his lowest,” I muttered. “Do you know the things that made Yonghwa tick? Do you know that he preferred meat over vegetables? Do you know that he likes to hold his Mom’s hand for five minutes before sleeping? Do you know that reading bores him to death? Do you know why he likes to float paper boats in the first place? These are trivial things, I know, but these things made him human, Mina,” there was a brief pause, and I exhaled before saying, “And me…knowing those things…made him my best friend.”

There was a long silence between us, and she finally said in a weak voice, “I never knew, Shin Hye.”

I nodded a little. “Don’t worry,” I said in a much calmer tone. “I’m not that insensitive. Yonghwa doesn’t know anything. I haven’t told him things that will complicate the situation, so you can relax, Mina.”

“How can I relax when you’re around?” she whimpered, as her eyes, which resembled a deer’s caught in headlights, met mine. “Don’t make him remember, Shin Hye, please. He forgot about these things already.”

“He forgot,” I pointed out. “If he forgot, then why are you so afraid? You know the answer to that, don’t you?” She swallowed, and I smiled a little—not to mock her, but to chase the pain away threatening to build up in my heart. “My friend said this to me earlier: people aren’t forgotten—just buried.”

She stopped sobbing in an instant, and feeling that we were out of things to say to each other, I turned around and walked away from her, with no specific destination in mind. I wasn’t afraid of getting lost, then, because I could always take the bus returning to City Center, anyway, and ride another bus home. At that time, it felt like any place away from Mina was okay for me.

<:>

That night, I didn’t go to Jinki’s place for dinner, and they didn’t call me to come over. However, someone rang the doorbell. It was a delivery man, holding a box of pizza—ham and cheese, my favorite.

“I didn’t order any pizza,” I said, confusion etched on my face.

“I just deliver,” he replied, smiling brightly. “Well, I hope you have a good night!”

“Y-Yeah, you, too,” I looked at the warm box I was holding, and smiled at the deliveryman. “Thanks.”

“Cheers!” he gave me a two-handed salute before heading back to his vehicle.

I closed the door behind me while pondering. “Who could it be?” I asked to myself. Shrugging, I headed straight for the kitchen and set the box on the table. I opened the flap of the box and my eyes widened when I saw a note taped on the cover.

Today, the Gentle Prince blew his top. It’s such an unheard of action and so he asks the Girl with the Autumn Eyes for forgiveness through a pizza we all know she loves. The Gentle Prince hopes to mend the situation before the night ends. (I mean come on! Who can refuse free pizza? It’s better than roses, right?)

I smiled helplessly at Donghyun’s action and before I knew it, I was already sending him a text message: Thanks. I won’t go hungry tonight.

Several minutes later, I received a reply, saying: Finish the whole box. If you don’t, then you’re dead.

<:>

I gorged down the pizza and after drinking the whole can of soda, I retreated to my room. I failed to return Yonghwa’s clothes earlier and so it was folded up neatly on my bed. I stared at it, and somehow felt sorry for Mina because of the things I said earlier. The more I thought about it, the more I felt bad about myself. With frustration getting the better of me, I took out a pen and paper and attempted to do my essay. I ended up writing other things, instead.

<:>

Things I like about Yonghwa

♥   He didn’t mind my pebbles obsession

♥   He ate the food I made for the first time (he got an upset stomach because of it)

♥   Whenever we play ball, he throws it to me softly so I won’t have to chase it over and over again

♥   He lets me score in basketball—sometimes he even lets me win

♥   When I get hurt, he gives me a piggyback ride home

♥   He sings to me

♥   He cried in Lion King with me

♥   He reads the books I make him read

♥   He’s not ashamed that his best friend is a girl

♥   I just do

What I don’t like about Yonghwa

♥   He buried me deep in his thoughts

<:>

Why Hannah-ssi is likeable

★  She ran through the pavement fountain with me despite knowing the fact that she will get wet (Mina refused when I asked her back then)

★  She busked with me

★  She treated me like a normal person

★  Her smile is contagious

★  She trusts me

★  She’s fun to be with

★  I feel comfortable around her

★  She just is

What frustrates me about Hannah-ssi

★  She isn’t my best friend…but I’d love to be. (That red-haired guy is fortunate!)

"He must become greater; I must become less."
- John 3:30

I have a secret message hidden somewhere in here. It's a random fact. Heh. I got the idea from dulcee. She's one of the first authors I've ever subbed to and she's the girl who made the crackiest fic I've ever read and enjoyed: It's a SHINee Facebook.

Hey guys ^^ earlier, I received a PM ^^ It's poem coming from bluein and it's from Shin Hye's point of view:

Random Fact: I include some true-to-life happenings in my stories and I twist them up a little to fit the plot. Do you know how Sunggyu's dad liked to whenever he cried at Lion King? My Dad used to do that to me, too. Do you know how his Dad became a star? My Dad's a "star", too.

Remember Me
You were my childhood friend
We were inseparable to no end
A perfect pair, you and me
Floating paper boats out to sea.
But fate has played a trick on us.
A cruel reality is upon us.
Fate is so unkind you see,
‘Coz all of a sudden you have forgotten me.
You don’t remember me from before,
I still remember us forever more 
I cannot do anything about fate, 
But just go with the flow and bear this heartache.
I cannot measure how much I miss you.
The need to talk to you is long overdue.
My heartache is humongous,
I beg, please remember, am I ambitious?
Someone once said just to give it time
‘Coz apparently we never really forget 
And in his mind a trace of a certain person exist
But for now just buried and needs to resurface.
How long do I have to wait?
Am I ever going to get an exact date?
But all these questions, I don’t need an answer.
So be it if it takes forever,
So long as you can remember.

Creys ;A; In case you guys don't know, I'm a very sentimental person ^^;; I'm just like that and sometimes it's not even healthy. I keep an empty yakult bottle with me and an empty coffee cup, as well. Those two things represent a special event that happened in my life ^^;; Anyway, I've been reading your comments and I feel sooo fired up :D

makebelieve that's a pretty good idea ^^ But then to avoid confusion, if I've the time, I guess I'll make a separate fanfic for it ^^ I'll post up a poll for it and let the readers decide. Hee~ But seriously, I wanna know what happened to Yonghwa while Shin Hye was away, too ;A;v

omoproudBANA Nay, hear art thou, my fair lady, ye shall not churn your heart *nosebleed* is the story too sad to handle? ;A; don't worry. It'll lighten up in the future ^^

Clubberontheblock I've already a plan as to how Yonghwa will remember Shin Hye. And that scene will happen soon enough ^^

luvdzlyf No cry, no cry... ;A;

deanne "Love is not love without pain and sacrifices" ► THIS

mymy5106 Your comment, I felt it, too ;A; I feel so fuzzy I can't even!

miss-hitomi *sigh* I know how you feel.

_ObnOxiOus_ lol let's pray for it ^^ Truth be told, I based off some of the traits of Donghyun and Yonghwa from two of my guy friends, albeit my fanfic characters are better. lol. I know your Yonghwa/Donghyun will come around in God's time!

jobarza57 the thing is, even a deep well, if filled with too much water, will overflow. If Donghyun waits quietly, then he's going to lose a fight without even entering the ring. That's why I made him explode here ^^;;

YelleOh In every drama/fanfic, it's plausible to come across a martyr lover. lol. Well, I guess I subconsciously incorporated some of Shin Woo's ways in Donghyun ^^;; What I see affects what I write, after all ^^!

nnaeam These difficulties are just in the beginning ^^ Soon, our dooley couple will have a happy ending :D lol and did you know that John 3:16 was the first verse I've ever memorized? Not because I wanted to back then, but because I always saw it everywhere ^^ I'm blessed to have known its true meaning, as well. God bless you, too ♥

bluein and thank YOU for the poem ^^ I feel even more for Shin Hye now ;A;

mylchris my heartstrings...they are pulled. I'm deeply encouraged by your comment ;A; Thanks and all glory belongs to God alone ^^

janiejane lol I feel the same way as you ^^