9095

The manager who seems obliging guides us by saying ‘this way’,

Turning on the light on the long hallway, she says ‘Red to the right’,

The destroyed revolving door; blissful artifical flowers on the floor,

I passed the setted wall as if I energy to pass through it

Where’re you going baby?

 

I wait on this chair; don’t open your eyes until I count to seven

Pret un, the dewdrops of night on your neck; to the extent that you lost your voice,

Deux, from the mechanical treets to between your fingers,

Trois, the spider web which entangles and entangles like this, continously,

The sandclock which started to go backwards to 9095

 

The noise that echoes throughout the long hallway, ‘Have we met before?’,

‘The blue to the left of the red’,

The rusted angel’s wings; yesterday’s dream that has been deferred,,

Concealing your eyes from the direction of the claps

Who are you? Tell me baby,

You won’t show it to anyone, even if you put your hands on the mirror

 

Et quatre, the scent of nostalgia even on your back, your hot breath,

Cinq, the eyes which rise even in the darkness; if it’s not permitted,

Six, if your tears are reviving, then somehow,

The remains which slowly come to live in 9095

Don’t try to find anything more than this for I’ll be by your side,

Even though you can’t go back once you have opened your eyes,

If you still like it then, silently,

Pret un, the dewdrops of night on your neck; to the extent that you lost your voice,

Deux, from the mechanical treets to between your fingers,

Trois, the spider web which entangles and entangles like this, continously,

The sandclock which started to go backwards to 9095

 

Et quatre, the scent of nostalgia even on your back, your hot breath,

Cinq, the eyes which rise even in the darkness; if it’s not permitted,

Six, if your tears are reviving, then somehow,

The remains which slowly come to live in 9095

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

"Yoochun! Junsu! Changmin!"

 

Where are you guys? It's so dark here... I'm scared...

 

"Yunho..."

 

Jaejoong calls aimlessly, desperately. He hears his own voice lost into the dark surroundings, the road ahead and behind him murky. He knows he's in the forest, a site for a photoshoot. Him, Changmin, and Junsu had wandered off to play a while of soccer while the 2U couple took their duo shots. The manager had called, and they raced back, but he tripped and fell, and when he looked up, the two of them have gone. There were no more sounds other than the birds chirping, wing blowing through the green branches. He tried calling, but there was no reception in his phone. He cautiously walked to where he thought the others would be, ignoring his bleeding knees. 

 

That was two hours ago.

 

The black watch on his wrist beeped, 7 pm. 

 

The sky is growing dark, and it is starting to get cold. Jaejoong shivered when another blow of wind brushed past him. He was tired, hungry, and thirsty, and the back of his eyes burned, tears threatening to fall, but he bit his lip and tried to hold them in, continuing to walk. 

 

8pm. 

 

A sound of a creature moving voiced behind the frightened vocalist and he quickly whirled around. Silence. Jaejoong whimpered, wanting nothing more but the laughter of his bandmates and the warm arms of his lover. 

 

How could they just leave me here? 

 

9pm.

 

Too exhausted to walk anymore, Jaejoong slumped down beside a tree. He curled in and held himself close, hands rubbing on arms and legs hoping to warm himself up.

 

I don't wanna stay here... I don't wanna die here, not in this cold place, so lonely. Not yet. 

 

10pm. 

 

He runs through the memories of his life with his friends, family, as TVXQ, and with Yunho. There were so much he doesn't want to let go, and so much more he wanted to build ahead. 

 

11pm. 

 

Jaejoong couldn't hold it anymore and bursted into a fit of tears. He wailed and cried with all the strength he had left in his body. 

 

12. 

 

"Jaejoong-hyung? Hey, Jaejoong-hyung!"

 

The singer gasped loudly as he sprouted his eyes open. Changmin hovered above him, his hair a messy mop of black.

 

"Hyung, you okay? You were crying in your sleep..." The magnae's voice was low and laced with slumber. Jaejoong wiped his forehead and found it covered with sweat. A dream...

 

The singer bounced up on the bed, shocking Changmin and almost bumping into each other if the youngest hadn't backed away in time. Jaejoong rounded his arms around the magnae's waist, tears wetting the other's t-shirt. "I'm fine... Just had a horrible nightmare."

 

"Okay..." Changmin awkwardly patted his shoulder, and the room quieted down. 

 

Rumbling called from Changmin's body and Jaejoong laughed. "Ah Minnie..."

 

The magnae furrowed his eyebrows, "What? I'm hungry! It's 10 already!" 

 

He stood up and made way to the door, the youngest tailing behind. "Okay, let's wash up. I will make breakfast. Call the others up too!"

 

"Others? Yunho-hyung and Yoochun-hyung left already, for X-man, and Love Letter. I will wake Junsu-hyung up!" Jaejoong watched as Changmin dashed to Junsu's room and headed to the washroom. 

 

Right, the two has early schedules today... 

 

His heart dropped, disappointed. After the nightmare, he really wants to see his lover and all s. Holding Changmin calmed him down, but he still craves for the warm arms he missed devastatingly in the dream. 

 

Jaejoong sighed as he stepped into the shower cell. Warm water poured down his body and he relaxed in content. The nightmare has really tired him off.

 

The dream was so scary... Thinking I could have lost them forever...

 

He shivered at the thought, tears flowing over the rim of his eyes again. 

 

I want to see Yunho... If I was to die tomorrow, I want to spend all of my time with him and my members and family and friends. I... Don't want to hide this relationship anymore! 

 

~~~

 

Junsu ran over and hugs him from the side, "Hyung! Good morning! Mmm~~ breakfast smells soo good!" 

 

Jaejoong nudges him with his elbow, hands full of plates of fried rice. "Junsu, good morning to you too, and go get some juices." 

 

His dongsaeng saluted and turned to the kitchen. Changmin walked over and sat down while Jaejoong put the plates of food down. 

 

"Mmm~~ fried rice! I'm gonna dig in~!" Jaejoong chuckled from the magnae's out call and gestured him to 'dig ahead'. Junsu returned with three cups on a tray and sets them down. 

 

Jaejoong watched as his dongsaengs eat, his own plate barely touched. He only finished half when Changmin finished and sat down again with three yoghurts. Junsu finished not long after and went back to his room for a game with his twin broth