prepare yourselves for the chapter after this

“Get up.” commanded Sungjong, voice tight and controlled. When the older didn’t move, he gritted his teeth.

“I said, get up.”

The authority in his voice made Dongwoo move lethargically into a sitting position, pulling his legs in and leaning his forehead on his knees.

The maknae felt his temper rising. He prodded the older man’s hip unkindly with his foot. Dongwoo glanced up and their gaze met. There was so much pain in both of their eyes that they had to blink to be able to stash it out of each other’s reach.

“You can’t sit here. So get up.”

Slowly, sullenly, Dongwoo did as told. However it was taking him too much time and Sungjong was losing his patience. He grunted, snatched Dongwoo by his bicep and hauled him up with an unlikely force that Dongwoo hadn’t been expecting. The rapper regretfully stumbled into Sungjong who, expectedly, wasn’t strong enough to hold both of their weights. And before Dongwoo could do anything about it, they both staggered sideways, Sungjong’s back hit against the wall with the older in toll.

A sharp take of breath was heard as the air was knocked out of Sungjong. The warmth of it hit Dongwoo’s bruising cheek as his hands made its way to the younger’s hips while trying to steady himself. Sungjong still had his eyes closed, as if he couldn’t trust himself to open them in case his heartbroken tears escape. His hands were firm on Dongwoo’s shoulders but he didn’t seem to have the will or energy to push the man away. The rapper was still dizzy from all the punches he’d received no more than ten minutes ago to trust himself not to fall back onto the floor if he let go.

Both stayed against each other for a while. With Dongwoo’s palms situated on Sungjong’s hips, tracing his thumbs over the juts of the younger’s hipbones out of habit. But Sungjong’s curves were foreign against his hands and Dongwoo needed to remind himself that this was the boy who he had just fought before Myungsoo came. Sungjong’s breathing were ragged as he tried to keep his emotions under control but it was getting difficult. Even if it was Dongwoo whose chest was pressed against Sungjong, it kept the younger grounded and his own inner turmoil felt a little less scary.

He couldn’t let himself cry right now. No matter how heartsick he was. Sungjong simply couldn’t risk it in front of Dongwoo.

His eyes opened and the closeness of their faces startled him. He could see the corner of Dongwoo’s lips bruising, and the darkening circle around his left eye, Sungjong was sure, was definitely not an eye-bag. Dongwoo’s bangs were matted against his forehead and his dead flat eyes watched Sungjong without really seeing anything. The younger vaguely hoped the older wasn’t suffering from a concussion. (Although, he wished the rapper did.)

Ill-wishing wasn’t really Sungjong’s forte. He always hoped for the best of things, for things to turn out well, even if most things never did. Sungjong had always been a miracle-and-happy-accidents kind of guy. So at the moment, he was hoping dearly that, by some unlikely chance, he alone would be able to pull Dongwoo out of this loop without getting himself in.

Nobody seemed to want to deal with Jang Dongwoo, so Lee Sungjong would. For now.

Roughly patting Dongwoo on the shoulders, the younger decided, “Come on. Let’s get you cleaned up.”

And Sungjong meant this in every single way that existed.

<>

“Sunggyu has got to know this.” Hoya hissed. His hands were in fists and his neck tensed as he attempted to grip the white wall of the hospital’s hallway.

Him and Myungsoo had extricated themselves to have a private conversation elsewhere. And it came as a surprise when Myungsoo had been the one to ask Hoya personally, albeit Sungyeol’s suspicious eyes that followed them like a hawk.

“Where are you guys going?” Sungyeol had asked, “Why can’t you talk here?”

Hoya had given him an apologetic look since he, too, had not been sure of what Myungsoo wanted. And before the visual stood up from the floor, he’d purposely shoved Sungyeol’s head sideways, only to end up tripping over the taller’s ‘innocent’ foot.

“Let them be,” Woohyun waved dismissively, “Girls stuff.”

Myungsoo might have snorted despite of himself. Hoya had turned around to glare at Woohyun, fighting the urge to give the older the finger. And now they were here, little ways away, baring Sungyeol’s and Woohyun’s gazes on their backs. And really, just— Hoya didn’t even know what to feel right now.

“Are you crazy?” Myungsoo hissed, eyes wide in disbelief, “I didn’t tell you just so you could go tell Sunggyu.”

Hoya made an annoyed grunt as he secretly glanced over his shoulder to see where the other two were. Still a safe distance away.

“We’ve got to tell someone, though,” the dancer frowned.

Myungsoo shook his head, “And then what? We can’t do that. She’s a girl. You can’t. She’s a girl.”

“Yes, I know that.” Hoya blinked, a scowl evident on his face, “What does that have to do with anything? We’ve got to tell Sunggyu. Or should we tell Sungyeol?”

“No. We can’t tell Sungyeol.” Myungsoo scowled, “He won’t be able to do anything about it.”

Hoya nodded slowly, “Yeah, true. He’ll probably freak out or something… but Myungsoo, we’ve got to tell someone. Someone who knows what to do. What if it happens again?”

“It won’t.” the younger protested, “I won’t let it happen.”

Hoya wanted to punch something because, , he was there. He had been right there that day and he didn’t even do anything. He’d even went off with Dongwoo on that day, he’d even asked why the latter decided to change his clothes only to get a very convincing shrug, ‘it got wet after I broke down the door’.

Hoya hadn’t known, but Myungsoo knew—

“Why didn’t you stop him then?” Hoya hissed. “You were there, so why didn’t you—”

Myungsoo looked pained. And perhaps even regretful.

“I-I couldn’t. I was angry… and would any of you have believed me?” the visual asked before adding in a rush, “I was frustrated with her not knowing who I was and I just, I wasn’t—”

Hoya raised his hand telling the younger to stop. Eyes scrunched shut, he let out a sigh.

“And we were all worried about Sungyeol and Myungsin, and Sunggyu and Myungsin and—” Hoya snorted, waving his hand in the air, “. I should’ve known. We’re so stupid.”

Silence stretched between them for an eternity, while Myungsoo rocked back and forth on his feet out of irritation.

“Give me a good reason why you don’t want me to tell Sunggyu.” Hoya deadpanned. Because he really believed that Sunggyu needed to know. He was the leader and he cared about her more than any of them so he needed to know, right?

“Sunggyu hyung. He’s the only person she has.” Myungsoo mumbled, dark and sullen. “I don’t want— what if he thinks— what if—”

The visual struggled to find the right words and the difficulty were evident on his face. But Hoya kind of knew what he was getting at. And no. No.

“He’s not like that.” Hoya said flatly. Like it was the end of discussion. Nobody had the right to think that way about Kim Sunggyu.

“Yeah, yeah, Sunggyu’s great. But hyung, no guys like girls who are defected—”

Hoya smacked Myungsoo on the head and he was sure it was loud enough to echo down to where the other two were. But .

“Watch your mouth. She’s not defected,” the dancer fumed, “You don’t even know for sure what exactly happened. So don’t you assume things. This is why we need someone she trusts. Myungsin’s got to tell someone.”

“She could tell me.”

Hoya scoffed, “Like she would. She doesn’t even remember you. Why would she trust you? And besides, if she did tell you the details, you’d probably end up murdering Dongwoo… so.”

Myungsoo pursed his lips into a thin line of discontent. Like he was trying to hold back on his words that were on the tip of his tongue. The knit between his brows told Hoya that the unsaid was his biggest worry. But even before the dancer could prod, the younger blurted out.

“What if Sunggyu leaves her?”

Ah.

So that was what he was worried about.

“You really care, huh.” Hoya commented, leaning one shoulder against the wall, arms crossed over his chest. Myungsoo wouldn’t meet his eyes. He seemed to be more interested in his shoelaces all of a sudden.

Hoya pushed him lightly on the shoulder with one hand, “Dude, admit it.”

Myungsoo looked up, opened his mouth and then closed it again. Then again.

The dancer chuckled, “Sungyeol’s right. You really need to work on your people skills.”

And with that, Myungsoo made a disgruntled face at Hoya, while the older tried to keep a straight face. The dancer straightened, wrapped one arm around Myungsoo’s shoulders and started to steer him back to Sungyeol and Woohyun.

With a reassuring smile, Hoya said, “Don’t worry, dude. Sunggyu’s way too whipped for that.”

“How would you know?” retorted Myungsoo, trying to walk a little faster but got pulled back roughly by his hood.

“I just do.” Hoya grinned, “Just like you. You are so damn whipped.”

< >

Sunggyu kissed Myungsin gently on her forehead.

“Hey, so I talked to your doctor.” As Sunggyu said this, the girl stiffened. “Don’t worry, he didn’t tell me anything at all.”

Her rigid body relaxed slightly in his arms, snuggling closer into the crook of Sunggyu’s neck. The older sighed contentedly.

“He’s very unhelpful, how is he even a doctor?” Sunggyu complained and Myungsin chuckled.

“I’ve already changed my doctor thrice,” said the girl, voice muffled into his shirt.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

A few seconds later, Sunggyu pulled away a bit in order to look at her. Myungsin’s eyes were closed when she let out a small whine.

“Myungsin-ah,” the older said quietly. “Hey.”

Myungsin opened her eyes and blinked languidly at him, “Hi, how are you?”

“I’m doing really good, thanks,” Sunggyu chuckled. “So, wanna tell me what’s going on?”

Pursing her lips, she shook her head. The older traced his tongue over his bottom lip thoughtfully.

“Tell me anyways.”

The girl made this baby noise like she was an annoyed child who had been woken up from her nap, and really, it made Sunggyu’s insides do summersaults. ‘Ugh, she needs to stop acting like a kid. It’s making him feel old.’ And then that train of thought went forgotten when Myungsin pulled him into a tight hug that seemed unlikely considering how weak she looked.

“Sunggyu…” she mumbled. “You’ve been losing too much weight.”

Ugh, her calling his name without honorifics made him feel all warm. And really? He hadn’t even weighed himself lately. Or had he actually been staring at himself in the mirror everyday like the rest of the population. He’d just been too busy to care.

“You haven’t been eating too,” Myungsin whispered softly into his collarbone. “And you’re always sleeping late. You don’t even take naps anymore… you’re frowning all the time. Stop frowning. Smile more, sleep more, eat more, please.”

Sunggyu chuckled, “What are you saying? How’d you even know I sleep late? How’d you know I always frown?”

But really, all of this just might as well make him love her even more. She’d been noticing these things about him when he hasn’t even been aware of them. ‘Ugh, Myungsin was everything Sunggyu could ever ask for.’

“Because, because you always frown,” she reasoned childishly against the hollow of his neck.

“I might only frown when you’re around,” he reasoned. “Maybe, I lose appetite just by seeing your face— ow!”

Myungsin had bit harshly into his collarbone, and gave an annoyed whine. It sounded something like, ‘you idiot’.

“You brat,” Sunggyu groaned. Myungsin chuckled against his skin and apologetically kissed the spot where she’d just bitten down. She kissed it again when he wouldn’t stop making pained noises. So of course, Sunggyu kept on groaning.

<>

“Okay. So how are we going to do this?” Hoya whispered and Myungsoo rolled his eyes.

“We go in. And then we tell Sunggyu.”

Hoya bit his lips, “Dude, Myungsin’s inside. We can’t just tell Sunggyu inside if she’s there.”

Myungsoo looked around. Sungyeol was eyeing him suspiciously, still.

“Um, we get him out then.” His eyes landed on Sungyeol. The older raised his eyebrows at him questioningly, but the visual just shook his head.

“Woohyun’s outside. And Sungyeol.” Hoya pointed out the obvious.

“Well, then. You can just get them away from the hallway.” Myungsoo glanced at the dancer as if he was stupid.

Hoya crossed his arms over his chest as he made his way closer to their hospital room.

“How about—”

“Are you guys going in? Cool, I’m coming too.” Sungyeol piped up, and was about stand up, when Woohyun pulled him down again. The taller whined, “What?”

Hoya turned back to Myungsoo, “Hey, how about you go get Sungyeol away and I go talk to Sunggyu?”

Myungsoo stared at him for about an eternity, and then clucked his tongue, “Fine. Whatever.”

And then, suddenly, a brilliant idea occurred to Hoya. Before the visual could stride off, the dancer pulled him roughly by his hood.

The visual groaned, “Hyung, you’ve got to stop doing that!”

“Sorry,” Hoya said dismissively, a mischievous smile on his face, “I’ve got an idea—”

“Great.”

“—How about, you go tell Woohyun to get Sungyeol away and then come back?” the dancer suggested, “I’ll take Sunggyu out to talk and then you can, like, I don’t know, talk childhood stuff with your childhood crush—”

“She’s not—”

“Listen,” Hoya pressed on. “It’s just a talk. Be nice. And like, I don’t know, you could use some practice on your people skills. So try to tell her who you are without killing her. I think she deserves to know. Don’t you think so?”

Myungsoo’s eyes shifted around, mostly to the ground and then to Sungyeol who was engaging in an animated conversation with Woohyun. An absent smile made its way onto the visual’s face.

“Yeah,” Myungsoo gave a tiny nod, smile still evident. “She probably won’t remember… but— I’ll try. I’ve got a lot to thank her for anyways.”

end of 28:
‘is your heart too big for it to ever be broken…
is your heart too big for you to know that it's broken’

a/n: guys, you really should check this article on sungkyu out.
i can't, it's making me cry a river: https://jioo.jux.com/2106615

prepare yourselves for next chapter, i've written 2,000+ words of it already

i just need to prepare my broken heart for any unsubscriptions,