The taxi reached your destination. The taxi stopped at a sidewalk that was quite empty except for some passer-bys. You paid the fare and headed out of the taxi. Now along with the somber weather, the wind was blowing not too hard but strong enough to sweep away fallen leaves in random motions. You walked on the cemented pavement against the wind blowing vigorously on your face. The thundering clouds above did little to stop your unwavering steps.

Besides yourself, you could only see one or two persons in the area. The surroundings were quiet but in a serene way despite the hovering dark clouds that made the place slightly mystic. You continued to walk inwards along a narrow path towards the end. As you reached nearer to the end, your hands gripped the bouquet of flowers tightly and you held your breath. You felt unsettled but you bit your lips as you mustered enough courage to continue walking. At the end of the path, you finally saw the reason of your presence there.

You squatted down beside the marble slab, resting both knees on the grass patch beside the marble slab. You placed the bouquet of white tulips on the marble slab and your eyes travelled to another marble slab that stood upright on your left. Your fingers reached out to the slab and you ran your fingers on the carvings found on the slab - Lee Jaehwan. You could feel a wave of grief deluged through your body and somehow made tears welled in your eyes.

“Jaehwan, you are seeing me right? You..t-think.. I’m d-doing well still?” you said while trying not to choke on those words. “Jaehwan, it’s been… 3 years but.. the fact that you are not here with me.. with Raehan.. I feel empty.. I still do Jaehwan…” You hung your head as hot tears started to flow drastically down your cheeks. You could not hold back the anguish you kept in your heart the past 3 years. Coincidentally, raindrops started pelting on your skin forming an afternoon shower. You continued sobbing helplessly while you thought of the past painful 3 years that you went through.

“______ noona?” Wonsik called out to you as he entered the ward. He saw you resting against the bed frame while looking at Raehan who was sleeping soundly in his cot.

“Wonsik? You came alone? Where is Jaehwan?” you asked as you craned your neck to see if Jaehwan was hiding outside the ward, trying to give a surprise. Wonsik calmly sat down beside you and gazed at Raehan. He caressed Raehan softly and then turn towards you with an uneasy expression.

“Is anything the matter? Where is Jaehwan? Tell him to come and see Raehan.”

“Noona, I need you to be strong,” Wonsik said faintly as he held your hands. “Hyung.. he.. can’t be here anymore.. he’s.. gone…”

“Gone? What do you mean..by gone?”

“He.. died.. in the race…” Wonsik slowly blurted out the bitter truth. You felt like the words smacked you brutally on the face, leaving a deep open cut that would never heal. The next moment, you went hysterical, gripped with melancholy over the loss of the person that you relied on and the person that you loved most. You cannot imagine that Jaehwan was gone from your life forever when he was the one that promised to stay forever in your life. You instantly felt the world was empty, cold and meaningless once again. You wanted Jaehwan to welcome Raehan with his two hands and to see the gleam in his eyes while he gaze lovingly at his child, smiling widely from ear to ear but all that was shattered in mere seconds. You were devastated that Raehan did not see his father’s face and would grow up without him. Your heart hurts and your head felt numb, despaired by the reality of being alone without Jaehwan.

Cruel was the only word that struck your mind at that moment.