Dinober: Hey are you feeling okay?

 

I felt there’s something wrong with my online buddy, although I can’t see him but I could feel it while we verse each other online.

 

Bling Bling Jjong: She rejected me.

 

Dinober: You mean the girl you like?

 

Bling Bling Jjong: Before I even got to confess she told me she like someone already.

 

Dinober: Oh…

 

My fingers suddenly stop typing, there were just no words I could say to comfort him or advice I could give him.  I never had anyone who shares their love story with me and it’s not like I’m very experience with love to give him advice like what he does.

 

               Dinober: Don’t give up bud! You’ll never know what will happen in the future.

 

The words don’t sound all that useful but that was the only words I could say to him.

 

               Bling Bling Jjong: Thanks… I gtg now.

 

I shut the conversation window and turn off the computer. I look at Krystal who is lying on her bed watching t.v. I suddenly thought of Jonghyun.

 

I wonder if Jonghyun feels like Jjong.

 

I immediately shook off that thought and crawl on Krystal’s bed lying next to the laughing girl.

 

“What are you watching?” I asked seeing how much laughter the show brought to her.

 

“High Kick.” She said in between her laughter.

 

I never heard of this show before but nevertheless I wrap my arm around her waist and instantly she snuggles closer to me while we watch the show together with laughter.

 

“Amber I’m going to go to school early from tomorrow and you don’t have to wait for me after school.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Studies.”

 

I didn’t question anymore because whenever we talk about studying she always end up complaining about me not studying hard enough for exams.

 

 

I was having lunch with Krystal alone when suddenly Luna came in interrupting us.

 

“Hey Krystal did you watch last night’s episode?” Luna completely ignored me and sat down next to Krystal.

 

“Of course I did. It was so good and funny. I laughed the whole episode.”

 

“Me too!”

 

“Don’t you think that guy is so hot?”

 

The two girls continue to talk about that t.v. show that I watched with Krystal last night but fell asleep half way through. And throughout the rest of lunch I wasn’t able to squeeze in a word.

 

 

 

For the following days Krystal have been leaving school early and coming back late. Usually we would walk to school together and sometimes if she’s not hanging out with her friends we would walk back to our dorm together. But recently our daily routine has changed. I don’t spend that much time with her and the only time I get to spend time alone with her is at night after she comes back from her studies.

 

Again Krystal came back from her studies. Before she could enter the bathroom I quickly pull her in my embrace.

 

“Krys is there something wrong? We hardly get to spend time together.” I finally said the words that are stuck in my head for a long time.

 

“Sorry but it’s only for a short period of time. I promise after the exams everything will be back to normal.” She said while caressing my cheek.

 

“But…” Before I could protest she pulls my head forward shutting my mouth off with her lips.

 

Her tongue slips in my mouth connecting with mine; instantly I respond back feeling our tongue colliding together. She tightens her arms around my neck and deepens the kiss. I actually missed her kisses since we hardly have the time to spend with each other ever since she started her crazy studies.

 

Once again I lost. This happens all the time because she knows I cannot reject her kisses and now she make good use of this tactic. Like usual I was so immersed in our make out session that I totally forgot what I want to say.

 

Amber you’re so pathetic.

 

 

 

I woke up with an empty space beside me again. Without Krystal I don’t even need an alarm clock to wake me up, just not feeling her heat I feel there’s no point of sleeping anymore. I woke up, wash myself, dress up and then walk to school…alone.

 

On the way to school I saw Sulli walking with Luna. I was about to approach the two girls when I accidentally eavesdrop on their conversation.

 

“Sulli do you think the rumors is true that Krystal and Amber is dating?”

 

“You actually believe that?” Sulli chuckled.

 

“But they’re always together and Krystal never talks about guys she likes.”

 

“C’mon Luna, Krystal and I were friends ever since we can remember and I know Krystal’s ideal type is not Amber.”

 

“But Amber liked Victoria unnie before so there’s a possibility that she might like…”

 

“Amber Liu!”

 

Luna got interrupt by a sudden loud voice from behind that the two girls jumped in shock when they turn around.

 

“A…Amber?” They stuttered when seeing is just right behind them hearing every word they just said.

 

I was listening so intensively that I didn’t realize someone had approach me from the side. Jonghyun came wrapping his arm around my shoulder and half dragging me away.

 

“So you’re just fooling me the entire time, I feel like such an idiot.” Jonghyun grab the collar of my uniform and crash my back to the fence creating a loud noise. I winced at the pain as my back and head was being held against the metal fence.

 

“I actually thought you were my friend. I can’t believe you’re the one dating Krystal.”

 

“Wait…listens…” I struggle to let the words out.

 

Jonghyun release the grip on my collar and I fell back leaning against the fence trying to regain my energy back.

 

“We’re not dating.” My heart ached as I had to deny the relationship with Krystal.

 

“Then why are there such rumors?” Jonghyun said with a still furious face.

 

“I don’t know but you should know it’s impossible for us. Krystal is smart; she’s pretty and outgoing but me? I’m the geek. We may be friends but I’m definitely not the type she will like.”

 

There was a silence between the both of us and Jonghyun just stared at me. His face start to calm down and he reach his hands fixing my scrunch up collar.

 

“Sorry. You’re right, there’s no way Krystal would like you.” He said pulling a smile.

 

I could see he’s a lot relax and calm. The bell then rang for first period, Jonghyun quickly straighten his uniform and pick his bag up.

 

“I see you at lunch.” He quickly left to class without even saying bye.

 

I straighten myself up and pick up my bag swinging it over my shoulder.

 

What did I just say?

 

I sighed realizing the words that just came straight out from my mouth are nothing but the truth. All these times I was thinking that I’m the luckiest girl in the world to be loved by such a beauty but it’s time to wake up. There’s a reason why Krystal didn’t want to expose our relationship and a reason why Krystal is acting differently.

 

It’s because of me.

 

The sudden outburst words just made me realize how different we are and that I will never bring Krystal happiness. I chuckled at myself for being such an idiot and actually believe my life has changed for the better.

 

Amber, dreams over it’s time to wake up and face the reality.