Jackson had been watching each of his band mates gravitate to Mark, discovering what he had discovered first: that Mark makes the best pillow. It didn't help that he was beautiful. Just imagine slowly waking up from the best sleep of your life to look up and see that face.

Yeah. Exactly.

He had been trying to reign his jealousy in. He craved Mark's touch like no other, so to see Mark curled around the others was hard to handle. He had no claim on Mark; or at least, not a real one. (Jackson told himself that a) being Mark's roommate and b) being the first one to discover how comfortable Mark is did not, in fact, give him "dibs" -- although it felt like it should.) But it didn't stop the yearning Jackson had to claim Mark as his and his alone. He had real feelings for Mark, but he didn't know how the others felt, or how Mark felt. 

Jackson, for once in his life, was at a loss on what to do. He feared that saying anything would push Mark away. At least with the current situation, Jackson got his "Mark pillow" time the same as everyone else. He didn't want to lose that.

So he did his best to turn away when JB was snuggled into Mark (rather similarly to the way Youngjae had fallen asleep on Mark earlier in the week), or when Bam Bam practically cooed at Mark's side, or when Youngjae was singing in his sleep on Mark's shoulder. He tried not to look when Jr. was practically kissing Mark with the way his head was settled into the nook of Mark's neck, or when Yugyeom had so enveloped Mark that you could barely see the older boy. But it was the look on Mark's face that made it so hard.

He looked so happy. Every. Damn. Time.

It made Jackson happy, but it also broke his heart. Did Mark look like that with him? Why couldn't Mark look like that with only him?

Jackson went so far as to buy an actual Mark GOTOON pillow for everyone, but they still preferred the real Mark. (It didn't escape Jackson's notice, however, that everyone slept with their Mark pillow if the real one was taken -- himself included.)

Right now, Jackson was squeezing his Mark pillow in a tight hug (perhaps a little too tight) as he watched JB and Yugyeom snuggling with Mark on the couch while they watched TV. 

"You okay, Jackson? You look like you're strangling Mark." Bam Bam asked, pointing to the pillow in his hands.

"Oh...uh...just thinking. It's nothing." Jackson released his stranglehold on the pillow.

Mark suddenly appeared before him, hand outstretched. "I'm tired. Wanna go to bed?"

Jackson swallowed at the different ways that could be taken, but managed to eke out a, "Yeah. Sure."

Mark took his hand and led him to their shared bedroom. Mark lightly jumped onto Jackson's bed, patting the space next to him. "I can sleep here, right?"

"Of...of course." Jackson said, when really his head was screaming, YESSSSSSSSSSS. He quickly slid into bed next to the older boy, arms going around Mark's waist. He wanted to lay his head on Mark's chest, but Mark beat him to it, laying his head on Jackson's chest and one hand resting over his heart. Oh god.

Mark's head was right at Jackson's lips, so he pressed a light kiss to the top of Mark's head before rubbing circles into Mark's neck. He felt Mark sigh (Oh god) before he felt the hand over his heart grip his shirt (Oh god oh god).

Somehow, they both fell asleep, and when Jackson awoke the next morning tangled in Mark, he just lay there watching the beautiful boy next to him dream. He was able to watch when Mark's eyes began to open, when Mark realized where he was, and smiled -- smiled -- before snuggling even closer.

Jackson's heart leapt into his throat before plummeting to his stomach. He was elated, but he knew this wouldn't last. That he'd have to see Mark later with someone else draped over him. That he had no idea how Mark felt. It was too much -- it was just too much.

So Jackson ran away -- into the bathroom.

Mark looked at Jackson's retreating form sadly. Waking up that morning to Jackson's sweet face had been heaven, and Mark realized that he had been fighting the cuddling all along because he had been fighting his feelings for Jackson. He craved waking up to Jackson every morning, but now it seems that wasn't going to happen. Jackson ran away, which was a pretty definite answer in Mark's book.

The rest of the day Mark sulked, finding solace in cuddles with the other members, but not Jackson. Jackson didn't seem to want to cuddle anyway, refusing to look his way. I've ruined it, Mark thought sadly. I've ruined our friendship.

Later that evening, when they were all back at the dorm, Mark was walking back to his room when he heard voices coming from inside the room. He paused, listening.

"Why do you have to be so ing cute?" Jackson was saying angrily. "This is your fault, you know. Because you're so adorable, and huggable, and sweet." Mark heard Jackson hit something, as if he were punching his pillow. "I want to cuddle you so bad, but no, you had to look at me like I was the best treat ever, but then turn around and cuddle Jinyoung!" More hitting. "Don't cuddle with the others!!" Hit, hit, hit. "Ugh, it's so unfair! Don't look at me with that cute face! I ought to hit you but I just want to kiss you!"

Mark couldn't take anymore. His heart was shriveling up, realizing Jackson liked someone else. He opened the door forcefully and saw Jackson shove something behind his back. Mark fought to keep his emotions in and simply laid down on his bed, his back to the younger boy.

"I...I have to shower." Jackson stuttered before leaving the room.

Mark immediately sat up and looked at Jackson's bed. There was a lump under the covers, so Mark peeled back the layer to find what Jackson was hiding. It was Mark's GOTOON pillow.

Suddenly, a lot made sense. Mark was elated, and couldn't help the the smile the broke on his face. He had been talking about me! Mark's thoughts began to turn, and quickly hid the pillow back under Jackson's cover before turning on his laptop and typing away.

-----------------------------

The next day, Jackson came home to find Mark curled up on his bed with a Jackson GOTOON pillow. He must've been asleep, as Mark opened his eyes drowsily and said, "Ah, you're home."

"You...you got my pillow?" Jackson asked, confused, trying to ignore how adorable Mark looked.

"Yup."

Jackson quickly recovered with fake charm. "Why, when you could have the real thing right here?" He said, sensually highlighting his body with his hands. Mark hit him with his GOTOON pillow. Repeatedly.

"Okay, okay! I surrender!" Jackson yelled with a laugh.

"Don't be a cheeseball." Mark replied with a smile. "I got it for when you are away filming Roommate."

Jackson was so caught off guard he just stood there with his mouth open. "I...um...what?"

Mark snickered. "What else am I supposed to do, if I am used to sleeping with you?"

Jackson's face broke into the widest grin possible, before dimming a little. "Wait. Does that mean..."

"Yes, Jackson. I like you. A lot. I miss you when you're gone. And while I enjoy snuggling with the others, it's not the same as cuddling with you. I can't promise not to cuddle with the others, but I can promise that it won't mean the same thing as when I cuddle with you. That, and, you know, the kissing."

Jackson was dumbfounded. "K-kissing?"

Mark smiled and walked closer to Jackson, who backed up into the wall behind him. "Yes. Kissing. Unless, you don't want to?" Mark pouted.

Jackson gulped. "No, no. Kissing is good. Very good."

"Good." Mark grinned and proceeded to do just that -- kiss Jackson speechless. When Mark paused for breath, Jackson didn't even move. Mark waved his hand in front of Jackson's face, and Jackson simply touched his lips in awe.

"Okay then....I guess I'll just go snuggle with JB now." Mark said airily, moving to open the door. Jackson woke up at that, and snatched Mark's wrist away from the door knob.

"Oh hell no!" Jackson said, pushing Mark onto his bed. "You are mine tonight, Mark Tuan," he said with a wicked grin before pulling Mark close, the GOTOON pillows falling on the floor, forgotten. "And I'm going to make sure the others know it!"

-----------------------------

Yes, it was all definitely Jackson's fault, Mark thought as he lightly hit his Jackson pillow before setting it down on his bed. He turned and snuggled into Jackson's strong arms, which quickly pulled him closer to Jackson's toned body.

Mark looked into Jackson's amused eyes and kissed the smile off his face.

"Mine."