Dae sat silent in the group's van as they headed back to their dorm.

It had been 2 months since his father's death, and it didn't seem that they were any closer to getting the break they'd been promised.

And not only that, the staff had just dropped a bomb on them.

Yongguk had been pushing for their break, and while the company assured them it was coming, one of the managers had secretly just informed them that they'd been scheduled for another tour, this time in South America.

The manager was fired, and no matter how much the boys protested, the company insisted they were going forward with the tour.

Daehyun rest his head against the window, staring outside at the gray clouds and the rain rolling down the glass.

It reminded him of the night he'd gone to Ellie's, right after his father passed. 

She'd been there for him, held him as he'd cried....and then, he'd made love to her.

And left promptly the next morning before she woke up.

He felt horrible, but he was confused. After the pain and heartache of losing his father, he'd gone to her for comfort and he found it in her arms.

But he was worried the intimacy was a result of his heartbreak.

And he wanted to be separated for awhile to sort out his feelings.

He pulled out his phone, and swiped through his photos, pausing on one of Ellie smiling.

She hadn't even known he'd taken the photo.

It was his favorite. 

As he stared at it, he felt his spirits lift.

He absent mindedly her face with his finger, and found himself smiling.

Funny thing was, that was about the only time he'd smiled these past couple months.

When he thought of home, or Ellie.

He'd begun a text to her multiple times, but never sent it, totally unsure of what to say.

And as more time went on, the more uncomfortable he felt contacting her.

He knew he needed to, but he wanted to be sure of his feelings.

The last thing he wanted to do was hurt Ellie.

He had to do something soon though, it had already been 2 months and it wasn't fair to keep Ellie waiting.

He stared at her picture a moment, thinking. 

He had no good excuse for not contacting her the last 2 months, and he wasn't about to make one up.

He decided in the end to invite her to their upcoming concert..their last local one before leaving on tour. 

He'd invite her, then have her come back stage afterward and talk to her, tell her everything that had been happening and all that had been on his mind.

He opened a new text message and started typing.

The days passed, turning into weeks, then months.

He hadn't called, and she refrained from calling him. 

She wanted to give him his space. 

Not that it had been easy to do so.

She of course was able to see him on tv, and his smile was just returning.  Most performances since losing his father, he seemed unable to force a smile. He looked so sad it broke her heart. But more recently, she'd begun to see a change. A small tug at the corners of his mouth. It wasn't much, but it was there. 

She did her best to keep busy.

Working, while going to school and helping his mom out at home, which was hard sometimes, it only made her think of Dae more.

She would smile at the pictures in the hall of Daehyun with his parents, from a very small age to the most recent one taken the  time he'd come home when his father had first become ill.

There were a couple pictures of her too.

Together with Dae at the beach, or camping, or making mud pies with Dae in their backyard.

She was reminded of him daily, and she missed him terribly. 

At times she felt frustrated and had to refrain from calling him and asking if he'd figured it out yet.

She knew that wasn't fair.

But on the other hand..how long was she supposed to wait for an answer.

She was beginning to lose hope, because surely 2 months was enough time to realize if you loved someone romantically or not, right?

Ellie lie on her side on the couch watching tv.

She was watching a music program and  was waiting for BAP's performance to come on. 

Today was one of the days when she found herself feeling down and lonely, and wishing she could be with Daehyun.

She picked up her phone and opened a blank text message.

She bit her lip, thinking of something to say...but she didn't know what to say.

Hey Dae...how are you? She started.

She deleted it and started again.

Waiting for your performance on tv :)

She groaned and deleted it.

She didn't want him to feel like she was pushing him.

There was also something else on her mind. 

She was late.

Like, 30 days late.

She hadn't been too concerned..with everything going on, she'd been under a great deal of stress. It wasn't uncommon for her to be late when things were stressful..at least that's what she'd been telling herself, that is, until she'd spent the better half of last week with her head in the toilet. 

She took a pregnancy test but it came back negative. However, she'd been told at the clinic that it was possible she took it too early, before the pregnancy hormones had fully kicked in. They suggested she come back in 2 weeks.

But she hadn't.

She was scared.

What if she was? 

How would Daehyun feel about it?

Would it rush him to make a decision?

Would he decide to stay with her only because she was now carrying his child?

She couldn't tell her mom or Dae's mom. As far as she knew, neither of them knew she and Dae had slept together.

But it was only once.

She ruffled her hair and sighed.

What to do?

Just then her phone's text message tone went off.

She pulled herself from her thoughts and picked up her phone.

It was Dae.

Hey Ellie...How are you? 

Her eyes widened and her breath caught in . 

Finally!

A million possible responses went through her mind before she finally replied.

Hey Daehyun. I'm doing ok. How are you? She responded, feeling like it was awkwardly formal.  She wanted to keep it simple. It wouldn't be right to bombard him with questions the moment he finally text her.

Doing ok i guess.

Well, now what.... she thought as she considered what to say next.

But she didn't have to say anything.

Look, Dae continued. I'm sorry it's been so long. I should have contacted you sooner. I started a message to you so many times, but I was just so unsure of what to say....

She bit her lip, unsure of how to take his message. Was he still unsure? Surely if he knew how he felt about her, and it was in a good way,he'd have said so already...right?

Was he unsure of what to say because he thought it'd hurt her?

She debated straight out asking him if he'd figured things out...but, she'd waited two months...she could last a little longer...right?

It's okay. I know you have a lot going on. I don't want you to feel rushed, so i've been trying to leave you alone.

Well...we have a concert coming up...I was thinking...Do you want to come? And then maybe we can talk afterward, get a coffee or something?

So she would still have to wait....

She sighed and closed her eyes, trying to ease the anxiety in her stomach which churned, making her want to throw up again.

Sounds good. When? She replied reminding herself to be patient for the hundredth time.

He text her the day and time. 

I'll be there.

Okay, great :) After the show is over, i'll text you and we'll figure out a way to meet.

Okay :)

After a couple moments, she bit her lip and picked up her phone again.

Hey Dae?

Yeah?

....We're still friends right?

If nothing else, she had to know that their friendship wasn't lost.

Ah Ells, Always. Nothing could ever change that. Don't worry ok? We'll talk soon.  I promise <3

She breathed a sigh of relief. 

At least she knew she still had his friendship.

The nausea ebbed slightly and she lay back down on the couch. 

At the show...she'd tell him then... she'd feel better if he went with her to get the pregnancy test done. She didn't want to go alone.

She just hoped that when he said 'nothing would ever change their friendship' he really meant nothing.