Dae returned to the dorm, realizing there was nothing further he could do without knowing where Ellie was.

Yongguk had had it out with the CEO, and they'd reached an agreement. BAP would finish their remaining schedules, and after their last one, Music Bank in Mexico, they would be allowed to return home for a time.

Dae apologized to Himchan and Yongguk both for his behavior in the CEO's office but they both shook their heads. They were just as furious about what had happened and didn't blame him for it. Yongguk assured him that he was not done with the CEO.

In the days that followed, Daehyun found it hard to focus. 

He couldn't sleep, had no appetite and hardly ate. 

When they weren't at a schedule, Dae was at the dorm, usually laying about.

He'd also taken to drinking.

The members tried to encourage him, offered words of support and always made sure to invite him out with them, but he wasn't interested. 

He was constantly beating himself up for what had happened. 

And not knowing where Ellie was or how she was doing was driving him crazy. 

As the days went by, Dae slipped deeper and deeper into anxiety and despair.

The members became increasingly worried. 

He was losing a lot of weight, there were bags under his eyes, and he'd been drinking to the point of making himself sick.

"Dae?" Came Himchan's voice from his bedroom door.

When he didn't respond, Himchan entered the room. "Why are you sitting in the dark?" he asked flicking the light switch.

The lights kicked on and he found Dae sitting on the floor, his back against his bed, soju bottle in hand, the other hand shielding his eyes. 

"The light hyung." he grumbled. 

Himchan sighed, hands on hips.

Dae's hair was a mess, he was barefoot, wearing a pair of flannel pj pants and a white t-shirt.

"We're going to the movies, you want to go?" Himchan asked looking at the mess of alcohol bottles strewn about the room. He knew Dae was going to decline, but he wanted to offer just the same. He kept hoping that Dae was going to pull out of this, but it seemed as time went on, he was only slipping further and further away.

He went to schedules, but never smiled. He refused to listen to anyone aside from Yongguk. 

And he cried...a lot. Zelo had commented how most nights he was awoken by the sound of Dae's sobbing, and he'd eventually moved to Jongup's room to give Daehyun some space.

Dae had hardly moved when Himchan asked if he wanted to go with them to the movies. 

He simply shook his head, not even bothering to look up from the floor.

He lift his head only to take another swig of soju.

Himchan sighed, turned to the door and called out to the others. "You guys go ahead, I'll catch up with you later."

He shut the door, shrugged off his jacket and tossed it onto Dae's bed. 

"You know, for being the clean one, you sure have made a mess of this room." he said grabbing the trash can and beginning to collect the bottles that lay about.

As Himchan cleaned, he talked to Dae, making light, casual conversation.

Dae stared at the floor, ignoring him, moving only to take a drink.

When Himchan had finished picking up all the bottles he moved to Dae, taking the bottle from his hand.

"Hey!" he yelled at Himchan.

As Himchan moved away, Dae got up and followed him to the bathroom, getting there just in time to see him dump the rest of the bottle down the sink.

"Yah!" He shouted shoving him. "Why'd you do that?"

 "You know why. This is ridiculous Dae. You're not going to solve anything by wasting away."

"You don't know what the hell you're talking about." Dae scowled before turning away.

Himchan went to the kitchen, where he dumped the glass bottles into the recycler, Dae following him.

Dae went to the fridge and pulled out another bottle.

"Really?" Himchan asked.

"Really." Dae said sarcastically, giving him a snide look.

Dae turned away and was about to return to his room.

Himchan dropped the trash can and went after Dae, pulling the bottle from his hands.

"That's enough! You're going to make yourself sick again! You've already lost too much weight."

"The do you care, let me be!" Dae yelled back, making a grab for the bottle.

Himchan pushed him away and turned, dumping that bottle down the sink.

Dae opened the fridge pulling out another bottle. 

"That's enough Jung Daehyun!" he yelled.

Himchan reached in, pulling out the whole box of soju, tossing it on the floor, the bottles inside banging together and breaking, slowly soaking into the cardboard box.

Dae stared down at the floor then up into Himchan's face, his expression changing from shock to rage.

Dae came at him swinging.

He was drunk so his balance was off and he was swinging wildly.

"Knock it off Dae." Himchan warned, catching one of his arms.

Just then Dae's fist connected with Himchan's mouth. 

They both seemed stunned at what had happened, but Dae recovered quickly, trying to pull his other arm free from Himchan's grasp.

Himchan grabbed both of his arms and took him down, pinning him to the ground as he sat on top of him, straddling his waist while holding Dae's arms against the floor at his sides.

"Enough! Get ahold of yourself would you! You're a mess! What would Ellie think if she saw you like this huh?"

"Shut up!" he screamed. "You don't have a clue..so just shut UP!"

Dae struggled beneath him, but he didn't have the strength to get away.

"No YOU shut up. Listen to me. I'm sorry for what happened Daehyun, i really am. I can't know what you're going through, but this has to stop. You don't eat, you barely sleep, you are making yourself sick. Stop being so damn selfish and think about others for a minute. Would you want your mother to see you like this? Is this how you want Ellie to see you when you find her? What about us? You don't think this is affecting the group? Get it together Daehyun!" 

Himchan tasted blood in his mouth and spat onto the kitchen floor.

Dae stopped struggling all at once and burst into tears.

"You idiot." Himchan scolded. "You're not alone... Let us help you, talk to us, don't suffer by yourself! This isn't your fault, there's nothing you could have done. Stop beating yourself up. You should be taking care of yourself. If you can't do that, how are you going to take care of Ellie huh? Stop sulking and get out there and find her!"

"How? Huh! How am i supposed to do that, I have no idea where she is!"

"You're scared Dae, I get that, I do, not knowing where she is, or what's happened or how she feels about you, or what's going to happen next.. but drinking yourself to death is not a solution."

Daehyun made an attempt to shove Himchan off, but it was fruitless.

"No more alcohol Jung Daehyun, you hear me?"

Dae stopped struggling with Himchan and closed his eyes, tears rolling down his cheeks.

Himchan got off him, and sat on the floor next to him, wiping the blood from his lip. "Nice punch by the way, ."

Daehyun rolled onto his side, too emotionally exhausted to get up.

"You're lucky I love you or i'd punch you back." Himchan said staring at Dae's back.

"Shut up."

"No more drinking. Get your up, eat something and for the love of god when was the last time you showered?"

"I hate you." 

"I know. I love you too."

"You're a prick."

"Yeah yeah, i'm horrible for keeping you alive. Someday you'll thank me, you little ."

They sat in silence for a moment, and Himchan felt his adrenaline slowly returning to normal.

Daehyun had always been the groups mood maker. And he was almost always in a good mood. He drove everyone crazy, as the first one to get up in the morning, he would wake up the rest of the members, and everywhere he went he was usually singing or at least humming. He could be loud and obnoxious sometimes...but he was also the one that made them laugh until they cried. Lately however, there hadn't been any of that. Seeing Daehyun like this had them all worried. They did their best to give him space, but at this point Himchan figured it was better to intervene before he hurt himself. Leaving him alone clearly wasn't doing any good.

Just then, Dae began groaning, and Himchan knew what came next. He jumped up, grabbing the small trashcan he'd dropped on the floor earlier and got it to Dae just as he retched.

Himchan sniffed, shaking his head as his lip throbbed. "Dummy." he said softly as the contents of Dae's stomach emptied into the trash can.

Once Dae had finished, Himchan helped him up from the floor and led him to the bathroom, waiting outside while he peed and brushed his teeth.

He was ready to help him to his bed, but when Dae opened the bathroom door he pushed Himchan away, so Himchan followed behind him instead.

Dae crawled into bed, pulling the blanket up over his head. 

Himchan sat at the foot of his bed, resting a hand on his leg.

"It's going to be okay Dae."

"You don't know that."

He sighed, frustrated with the boy.

"You know we're worried about you right?"

When he didn't respond, Himchan got up and went to the bathroom, wetting a washcloth with cool water and bringing it back to Dae, yanking the covers off his head. 

"Go away." Dae mumbled.

Himchan frowned at him, but put the cloth on his forehead and sat next to him on the mattress.

"If you're not going to care for yourself, someone has to. I'm not about to sit back and watch you destroy your life Daehyun." Himchan said gently.

He sat silently for the next couple minutes, listening to Daehyun cry softly.

As the tears slowed, Himchan got up and left the room, returning a moment later with a glass of water and some asprin.

"Here." Himchan said sitting next to him. "Take this before you end up with a nasty headache, and don't even argue with me or i'll force it down your throat."

Daehyun sniffed and wiped his cheeks with his hands, sitting up just enough to take the pills.

Himchan watched as he gulped down the glass of water, his bloodshot eyes traveling to Himchans face, resting on his busted lip.

Himchan took the empty glass, setting it on the nightstand as Dae lay back down in his bed, facing away from Himchan, staring blankly at the wall.

"I'm sorry hyung." Dae said.

"Hm?" 

"I'm sorry...for hitting you."

Himchan chuckled. "Hey that's ok...next time you piss me off i'm gonna lay you out on the floor."

Himchan noticed a small smile pulling at the corners of Dae's mouth.

"And i'm sorry for all the trouble i've caused."

Himchan smiled.

"Don't apologize...just get better alright?"

Dae nodded slowly.

Just then, Dae's phone went off.

"Ugh, I'm not here." Dae groaned softly, pulling the blanket back over his head.

Himchan picked it up, glancing at the screen.

"I think you'll want to take this one." he said handing it to Dae.

Dae pulled the blanket off his face, and gave him a dirty look, but Himchan insisted, shoving the phone in his face.

He took it reluctantly and put it to his ear.

"Hello?" he answered, not even checking the caller ID.

"Daehyun," came Ellie's mother's voice through the phone. "Daehyun, I just talked to Ellie."