Junsu tapped his fingers absentmindedly as he sat on a chair in Yesung’s office. The elder had told him to come to the office early so that they could also start early. As he waited for the clock to turn 8, his mind wandered to thoughts about his hyung.

Junsu didn’t remember much of his childhood, but he knew that it was full of pain and abuse. He mostly retained memories from his pre-teen and early teenage years. Junsu never saw a reason to remember things. Instead, he preferred to forget them. However, once he met Yoochun, that line of thinking changed. He cherished every moment that he got to spend with the pianist and he couldn’t think of a life without the elder. To him, Yoochun was a light in his dark life.

However, coming here to the academy has shown Junsu a new world. He met more people that cared for him. But his sole passion, the love he had for music, was slowly crumbling. He was slowly losing hope in regaining his passion for the art. What was the point, really? His hearing will be gone after a while. He wouldn’t be able to hear, so what was the point of cultivating his love for music? There was no use.

‘But Mirae…’ Junsu thought. Mirae was a puzzle to Junsu. He had never met anyone that was as optimistic as the younger musician. Mirae had lost her voice, completely shattering her goal of following in her mother’s footsteps, but she was still able to smile and play music. It was amazing. Junsu wished that he was that strong. But he wasn’t. He was already giving up. ‘What drives her to continue? Will I also find something that will push me to continue in music?’

“Hi Junsu, have you been waiting long?” Yesung asked pleasantly, successfully breaking Junsu’s thinking.

Junsu’s head snapped towards the door and he found the dark-haired male. He stood up hastily and bowed, a quiet greeting escaping from him. Junsu noticed that Yesung was carrying a turtle in his arms.

“Sit down,” Yesung chuckled. “I’m sorry I’m late. I had to make sure that Ddangkoma was okay.”

Junsu only hummed in agreement, not knowing how else to respond to such a statement. He watched as the elder moved towards the tank in the room and carefully placed the pet turtle within it.

“Shall we start?” Yesung asked with a slight smile curving his lips as he sat down.

“Okay,” Junsu nodded meekly.

The two males awkwardly started their lesson. While Yesung didn’t seem to be bothered, Junsu was another story. He kept fidgeting within the other’s presence, constantly looking at the other man and speaking in soft tones.

“Is something wrong?” Yesung finally asked as they finished their fifth lesson for the day.

“N-No,” Junsu squeaked.

Yesung sighed. “Am I scaring you?”

“That’s not it, Yesung hyung,” Junsu denied.

Yesung opened his mouth to reply, but a knock on the door interrupted their discussion. “Come in,” Yesung called out as he faced the door.

The door opened and Ryeowook walked in with a sheepish smile. “Hey hyung,” he said. He turned to Junsu with a warm look, making the younger feel more at ease. “Hi Junsu-ssi, it’s nice to see you again.”

“What brings you here, Wookie?” Yesung said as he stood up. He approached the other male quickly and Junsu watched with interest.

Junsu gasped in shock as Yesung’s fingers suddenly prodded the space between Ryeowook’s nose and upper lip. Ryeowook squeaked, moving back on instinct.

“Hyung!” Ryeowook whined.

“Sorry,” Yesung apologized with a slight chuckle. “So why are you here?”

“Well, Jaejoong hyung told me to come here so that Junsu could eat lunch. Knowing you, you probably lost track of time,” Ryeowook said.

“Ah, is it already noon?” Yesung asked. His dark eyes caught sight of the clock and he blinked as he noticed that 4 hours had passed since they started. “I guess it is.”

Yesung and Ryeowook turned to the silent male in the room, smiling at him.

“Go ahead and eat lunch, Junsu. Come back after you’re done, then we’ll work on one more thing before you leave,” Yesung informed.

“Yes hyung,” Junsu nodded. He stood up and murmured a goodbye as he stumbled off. He went off and ate lunch with Jaejoong as company. Afterwards, he headed back to Yesung’s office.

Yesung looked up, dark eyes staring at him seriously. He stood up with a tiny smile. “Let’s go.”

“H-Huh?” Junsu blinked as he watched the elder man walk out of the office.

Yesung turned slightly. “The thing I want to teach you can’t be taught in here. We need to go to the music room.”

Junsu stilled in his tracks, stopping by the door. Yesung looked at him with a raised brow, silently asking if something was wrong. Junsu gulped nervously as he stared into Yesung’s eyes.

“H-Hyung, I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Junsu whispered.

“Why not?” Yesung murmured. He placed a hesitant hand on Junsu’s shoulder. “Yoochun told me that you can play the piano. I wanted to see how good you are.”

“I can’t,” Junsu said. He could still remember that time that he was asked to play the piano for Mirae. He couldn’t play the piano, not again, not yet. “I can’t do it, hyung.”

“Why?” Yesung asked as softly as he could.

Junsu shook his head, his hand coming up to his ear. He gently fiddled with the lobe of his ear, and his heart clenched painfully at the thought of his hearing. “Please don’t make me do it,” he pleaded.

Yesung chewed on his lip in contemplation. He sighed as he turned around. “Well, let’s just go, anyway. I’ll show you something if you won’t play the piano. Don’t worry about it.”

Junsu trailed behind the elder male quietly. He couldn’t speak as he felt that he had disappointed Yesung, and maybe even Yoochun. But he just couldn’t bring himself to play yet. He wasn’t confident in his abilities.

“Don’t worry about it, okay? I’m not mad. I’m not disappointed. You’ll grow and learn in your own pace, Junsu,” Yesung said when he noticed that the nearly deaf male was moving hesitantly beside him.

“Ne, hyung,” Junsu whispered.

The rest of the walk continued silently with both males immersing themselves in their own thoughts. Yesung remembered the meeting with Yoochun. The younger man’s answer lingered in his mind and he remembered that he had invited someone else for this lesson.

“Why do you think I can help him?” Yesung asked. “If you, the person who saved him, can’t even do it, what hopes do I have?”

Yoochun sighed. “It’s not you. It’s Mirae,” he admitted.

“What do you mean?” Yesung questioned, his brows furrowing beneath his fringe.

“Mirae… That girl is strong. You know that, hyung. Despite losing her voice, she never once stopped pursuing music. I think she’ll be able to help Junsu break out of his shell. I think she’s the key to removing the fear in Junsu’s heart,” Yoochun answered. He looked up, his eyes void of the usual mischief. “I also hope that Junsu’s innocence can help her. Maybe she’ll finally open up about her feelings, hyung. She needs that, someone that she won’t be afraid to show her weakness to. Maybe with Junsu’s lack of knowledge about things like that, she won’t be so afraid. Maybe Junsu can even bring back her lost childhood, because we both know that she matured too quickly, hyung.”

“I heard that you knew Mirae, so I asked for her help. I hope that her presence can calm you, at least,” Yesung said just before they reached the music room. ‘I also hope that Yoochun is right.’

Junsu’s heart grew heavier. He was reminded of the scene in the music room again. Didn’t he promise himself to try harder? The lyrics from the song she had given him echoed in his mind, further complicating his thoughts. ‘Can I really do it? Can I play again? But how can I do it when my hearing will leave me soon, anyway?’

Yesung opened the door and led them both in. Mirae was seated on the floor, completely immersed in her task. She had a guitar in her lap, her fingers strumming the strings as a sad smile formed on her lips. The music was familiar to Junsu, and he quickly pieced that this was the melody for Stand Up. Unknowingly, Junsu’s mouth opened and the lyrics of the song softly made their way out of his throat. The music stopped abruptly and Mirae looked up, eyes wide in shock. She stared directly into Junsu’s own shocked eyes.

As Yesung lingered by the door, watching the scene silently, he couldn’t help but think that Yoochun might have been right about this. 

Double update! After being gone for so long, I owe you this, at least. Honestly, where is this story going? Hahaha. I wonder if you're still enjoying reading all of this. I hope that you enjoyed the chapter, though. This chapter mainly focuses on Junsu's problem with tackling music again. He wants to do it, but he also thinks that he can't and that it's no use because of his condition. However, Yoochun has already laid out a rough plan for Junsu that involves Mirae, so we'll see where it all goes. Thank you for reading and staying with the story so far! Comment and subscribe~!