Track 03

It was getting colder the longer I sat there. I walked to another place. I didn’t know where to go, but I just walked. I stumbled upon the bookstore. I walked in and went to the back where all the chairs were. I still had the headphones on, but the track wasn’t playing. I paused it so I would have time to think. I needed time to think.

Where do I fit into all of this Jackson? What do I have to do with your death? I’m still confused as to where I fit into all of this?

I sat in one of the single chairs. My thumb traced over the play button. I pushed the button and hoped for the best. I knew that in the end this story is not going to be a happy ending. Jackson is gone and it’s that’s not a happy ending.

I’m glad you made it back Yi Eun. I’m happy that you are listening to me. I’m happy that it’s you and not anyone else. You know, I’m starting to think that you that just maybe you like me. Let’s get back to the story. Shall we?

I now realized that I am the prey, and the predator is out to get me. The predator being Jiho. This is not a fun game. This is not a game in which I wanted to play. I never wanted to play this sick game with everyone. I did not want to be the only one playing this game Yi Eun.

I don’t particularly remember when Jiho started becoming the predator. It just happened one day. There was a note left on my desk from JB telling me that he wanted to talk after school at the gym. I was skeptical on going, but I went anyway. At lunch time, the whispered words and stares never stopped. I was still the monster. I will always be the monster. I couldn’t even eat in the cafeteria without feeling attacked. The day passed on like that. At the end of the day, I went to the gym. The door was locked behind me, and at that point I knew that it was not JB. Jiho was standing there, waiting for me. He was the only one in the gym. I couldn’t run away because there were his crew standing on the other side of the door. He walked towards me and grabbed me by the collar. He pushed me into the doors and the door handle hit my back hard. I screamed out in pain. He laughed at me. He called me names that I shall not repeat here, but you can take a guess. He told me that I was nothing but trash, that I should just die already. (If you think that this is the reason that I’m gone now, it’s not.) I was scared. I was extremely scared. He hit me several times. I don’t know what happened in between, but Jiho stopped.

The gym door opened and Jiho let go of me. He and his crew ran off. I was left on the floor bloodied and beaten. I had no energy to get up. I just laid there. The person that opened the door ignored me and left me there. The guy grabbed a soccer ball out of the storage room and left. I groaned in pain, but the guy never did anything. He quickly left as fast as he came inside the gym. (His name will be mentioned later on.) It took me some time to get up. I walked home slowly and avoided my parents. They were too busy teaching little kids. I went to my room and laid in bed. I was so tired Yi Eun.

The next day the same thing happened. Jiho would corner me when I least expected it. He would beat me up. Sometimes his friends would beat me up as well. I had bruises that lasted longer than they should. I had cuts from objects that I don’t even remember. I felt like trash. I felt like I should just disappear. The same guy appeared at the same time every day. He was the one that ran off Jiho and his crew every single day. I would say the guy saved me, but he didn’t. He did absolutely nothing to help me.

Days passed on like that. Every day after school Jiho would beat me up. He never gave a reason as to why. He just laughed at me and told me that I was less than the dirt. He told me that I was disgusting. One day he took me to the rest room and gave me a swirly. I felt like I was drowning. I held my breath as long as I could, but water managed to seep into my lungs. It burned. Every time he dunked me into the water I held by breath for as long as I could. Each time it burned even more. I wanted to disappear. I wanted to go somewhere where no one could find me.

There was only so many lies I