it was autumn.

yoona was blue all over again. she was not okay.

and neither did jongin, with bad grades and bad parents. 

"you know, jongin. just because your grades is not enough for your parents, doesn't mean everything is over" her fingers latched to his shoulder, sprinkling stardusts over his heart as they sat side by side on the top of nowhere, where the air smelled like salt and the ocean washed over their worries and bringing back more anxieties. the skies were so murky that the stars are nowhere to be seen.

"hm" jongin only let out an answer that is definitely not one.

yoona coughed, knowing that jongin's mind is farther than where his body is. "i mean, look at me! i have good grades, but does my life seems any better than yours? no. i have nothing, jongin. absolutely nothing, besides my good-for-nothing marks and my paintings, my paintings which don't matter to people"

jongin sighed, slumping down on his back. "come on, don't guilt-trip me yoona. you are making me feel ungrateful of my life"

"i thought you would understand"

she tucked some loose tresses behinds her ears as her frown deepened. "you are not listening, jongin. what i mean is, that at lea-"

"i know, yoona, i know. at least i am living a life, but then-"

yoona sighed exhaustedly for the millionth time. "but what?! at least you have a life! look at me, my happiness only revolves on breathing acryllic paints and colours into shapes. i have given up on making friends a long time ago, because they all left...they all left, jongin"

"so what if i have a life? do i look satisfied with my life right now? wake up, oh dear alice! my life is not as happy as you thought it would be. my friends, they stay on sunny days where everything's bright and fun. but who stays when thunderstorms arrive and even, when hurricane pays for a visit? you, yoona. only you, and you still stay, even after so many ty things that i h-godammit, yoona why are you crying?"jongin went on and on for minutes, and his face-you don't want to see his face. it's so desperate, so worn-out and so sad at the same time that she no longer listens. 

"jongin, you look so miserable. i'm sorry, i'm sorry"she jumped into his arms as she sobs into his shirt, clinging into him so tight that he thought she would tear him apart.

"don't be such a crybaby, im yoona. don't drag me into crying with you"

seconds later, they huddled into each other as they weep into each other's arms. crying for their lifes, crying for their mistakes, crying for each of their broken souls.

", , . we are so screwed, kim jongin. i'm so tired, i'm so tired"she said through muffled sobs and tear-stained face.

they shedded tears so many that they were left by darkness beneath them.

abruptly, jongin left her arms and stood up, wiping his tears vehemently with sad, sad bloodshot eyes and deep dark rims. jongin said the most maddening things; this one blows her wits out.

"we could just jump, yoona"

through a smile that doesn't reach his eyes, kim jongin lets out a croak-no, a whimper.

"no, jongin. you're insane. just don't"yoona tried to stop her tears, but jongin's words doesn't do any help.

"at least we could be happy for once"jongin did something that saddens her more; he smiles.

jongin took her hand, and she didn't pushed him away.

it was ironic. jongin was smiling his brightest smile, whilst yoona attempted to stop her tears.

"we'll run for it. be ready yoona. we'll land in the ocean, and we'll be fine"

you'll be fine, yoona. but not me.

she nodded, her eyes finally stop leaking.

3...

2....

1....

they ran for their life, hands latched to each other as the salty air welcomed them.

and they jumped. they jumped so far that their breaths almost caught by the birds.

for a moment, they felt forever slipping through the empty gaps of their fingers.

and at that one evening in autumn, two young lads chased their happiness towards the setting sun.

and they went down with it, sinking to oblivion with crinkling eyes and smiles on their faces.

but at that moment in between, they felt infinity in the palm of their hands, pumping alive and exuding a new hope of a better tomorrow.

a tomorrow where they can be truly happy.