Chapter 20

A while later, Zitao and Jongdae returned to Yixing’s studio apartment thing. Jongdae was still a little nervous and teary from his mental breakdown earlier, but at least wasn’t sobbing. Zitao was starting to wonder how Jongdae would react actually seeing Minseok. Whatever it was, Zitao would be there for Jongdae.

Yixing was making dinner, presumably (Zitao hadn’t realized it had gotten that late). Minseok seemed to be begging Minseok to let him help or do something. Neither of them noticed Jongdae and Zitao were back. Yifan and Joonmyeon were nowhere to be seen; perhaps in the room set up for the four of them. Somehow, Zitao didn’t think it would be a good idea to disturb them while they were alone. He sighed lightly and led Jongdae into the small living room, instead.

Yixing, hearing footsteps, looked over. “Oh, you’re back? Yifan-ge and Suho are in the room I set up for you guys if you want to go in there and wait with them.”

It took a second for Zitao to realize Suho must be Joonmyeon. Maybe he thought Joonmyeon was too complicated to say? He shook his head in regards to Yixing’s question, glancing at the room he was referring to, which had its door closed.

“No, I’ll leave them alone in there.” Zitao said. “I don’t think I’d like what I’d see if I went in.”

Yixing laughed silently and turned back around to pay attention to the food. Minseok, this time, turned around to look at Zitao and Jongdae. Zitao stared back, hoping he was glaring or giving him an intimidating look. Minseok seemed to sigh, say something to Yixing, and then walked towards the living room to meet Zitao and Jongdae.

Zitao slid over, moving Jongdae slightly and making sure Minseok couldn’t sit next to Jongdae, but still yet him sit down, figuring he had something to say. Minseok glanced at Jongdae, then back at Zitao, a little warily. He sighed once again.

“Can I talk to Jongdae-ah alone?” he asked in a little odd sounding Mandarin (maybe so Jongdae wouldn’t understand.)

“Sorry. I can’t do that.” Zitao responded. “You either talk to me, or talk to the both of us.”

“Man, you have to hear me out!” Minseok insisted. “I—I didn’t think he would go blind from it! I-it wasn’t my fault… I swear…”

“He’s upset. Do you know that? Because of you he remembered how he went blind.” Zitao said. “He remembered the pain he suffered not being able to see the people he cared about. You were one of them. He told me he sometimes thought that maybe if he had never become friends with you, he would still have his vision and wouldn’t be abused by his parents.”

Minseok seemed surprised. “He—he…?”

Zitao stood up. “Talk to him if you want, but don’t be surprised if he starts asking for me or something.”

With that, he said something to Jongdae quietly and left to knock on the door to the room the four of them would be sharing. Joonmyeon greeted him looking no different than he did when they left, surprisingly. Glancing inside, Yifan also looked the same. Zitao shrugged inwardly.

“What’s Minseok-hyung doing talking to Jongdae-ah?” Joonmyeon asked. “I thought you didn’t want Jongdae-ah around him.”

Zitao shrugged. “I’m sure Jongdae-hyung will call me if he needs me. He’s older than me. He can handle a talk with an old friend who caused him to go blind…”

“You’re mad about it, aren’t you?” Joonmyeon inquired. “You’re just trying to stay composed for Yixing and Jongdae’s sake.”

Zitao shrugged again and gently pushed past Joonmyeon, not wanting to see what was going on between Jongdae and Minseok. Yifan eyed him curiously, probably wondering if he was going crazy or something.

“Zitao. You’re upset about it.” He confirmed without Zitao even having to say anything. “Dude, just go out there and get Jongdae. He’s probably uncomfortable right now. No one will judge you. He’s your boyfriend for Christ’s sake!”

Zitao looked over, then peered out the open door. Jongdae did look very uncomfortable. It made Zitao want to hug the latter. He sighed and stood up hesitantly. He wanted to make it seem like he didn’t dislike Minseok. He left the room quickly, meeting Jongdae and Minseok back in the living room. Minseok looked over; Jongdae looked like a lost puppy.

“Jongdae-hyung, let’s go wait for dinner in the room.” Zitao said, completely ignoring Minseok. “Sorry for leaving, by the way. I had to go to the bathroom.”

Jongdae’s eyes lit up at the sound of Zitao’s voice. “Tao-yah! It’s okay! Minseok-hyung was just asking about you…that’s all.”

“Are you alright?” Zitao asked.

Jongdae hesitated, but nodded, possibly for the sake of Minseok. “Yes…I’m fine.”

But Zitao could see the look in his eyes. He reached down and grabbed Jongdae’s hand to pull him up. “Do you need anything? I can ask Yixing-hyung if you want anything.”

Jongdae shook his head. “It’s okay, Tao-yah. I’m just happy you’re back; I don’t need much. Let’s go in and talk to Joonmyeon-hyung and Yifan-hyung. It’s boring in here.”

Zitao laughed. “Okay.” He turned to Minseok. “Uh...See you at dinner, Minseok…hyung? I hope you liked your talk with Jongdae-hyung.”

Minseok looked like he wanted to say something, but didn’t. Zitao liked to think it was because Minseok was intimidated by Zitao. He laughed silently to himself and took Jongdae back into the room Joonmyeon and Yifan were in. Part of Zitao felt a little bad—obviously, Minseok was really close with Jongdae before. But it was also technically his fault that Jongdae was blind.

Not soon later, Yixing called them into the kitchen for dinner. It wasn’t much, but food was food. And part of Zitao missed Beijing food. Jongdae seemed curious too, about the food, which smelled very delicious. Everyone dug in, silence filling the air most of the time, but there was light chitchat, mainly in Mandarin, between the four Chinese males. The air around Zitao, Minseok, and Jongdae was a little tense. Minseok would look at Jongdae, who would be clueless, then immediately look away when Zitao looked at him. Joonmyeon seemed to feel bad for Minseok.

“Minseok-hyung.” Joonmyeon said. “Why don’t you explain to everyone why you’re so awkward around Jongdae-ah now?”

“Yeah,” Yixing added in Mandarin. “You were so excited to see him. But now you seem afraid.”

Yixing seemed to be able to understand Korean. But why didn’t he speak it? Zitao shrugged and looked at Minseok for an answer. Minseok seemed hesitant. Maybe he was trying to figure out what language to speak in. Or maybe he just didn’t want to make Jongdae upset again.

“I told Yixing-ah half of mine and Jongdae-ah’s relationship.” The male said after a while. “But…I’m partly the reason why he’s blind…”

Jongdae looked up quickly. Zitao eyed the smaller for a second, then turned his attention back to Minseok to hear his side of the story. His hand subconsciously went to grab Jongdae’s under the table for support.

“We were real troublemakers in school.” Minseok continued. “We took pranks too far sometimes and got in a lot of trouble, but we didn’t particularly care. If we hurt ourselves, we’d take care of each other. But…I came up with a prank of cutting the breaker in school and causing chaos. We got in trouble and for some stupid reason, the principle made us fix it. I was thinking ‘wouldn’t it be safer if they just had like technicians or something do it?’

“I had tried to fix it, but for some reason, it wouldn’t work. So Jongdae-ah said he’d try. I wasn’t sure at first—he was only 11, what good could he do without hurting himself? But…he was smarter than me. So I let him do it, even though my gut was telling me to tell him not to.”

Jongdae had stopped listening long ago, trying to drown it out against Zitao’s arm. But Minseok was too far into the story to stop, even if he did notice Jongdae all but pulling Zitao’s arm off. Zitao was caressing Jongdae’s hair to calm him down. Obviously, this was a touchy subject for Jongdae.

“He managed to fix it…but in the process…he got electrocuted.” Minseok seemed a little emotional too. “I was in the hospital, unconscious, for like…a week. And when he finally woke up, I was there. And he told me he couldn’t see anything. And I just—broke down. When my parents found out I was the one that caused it...they forced me to transfer to another school. Then I finished senior high in China, never seeing Jongdae-ah ever again.”

“When I saw him today…I was really excited. But then he ran away from me…and I just felt the guilt of the accident rush through me again…” Minseok sniffled. “I’m so, so sorry, Jongdae-ah. If I had known that would happen, I wouldn’t have let you try to fix it… I should have just listened to my gut feeling… I’m such an idiot. Please don’t hate me, Jongdae-ah…I—I don’t know what I’d do if I lived my life knowing you hate me…”

Jongdae looked over. “Hyung… I—I didn’t know you felt that way… I—I don’t hate you… I just hate the memories…”

Zitao glanced at Jongdae, half in surprise. Then he smiled. Jongdae was very forgiving. It was very inspiring. And what Minseok did wasn’t that bad. He didn’t know—it wasn’t like he did it on purpose. He rubbed Jongdae’s arm slightly. He looked at Minseok apologetically.

“Hey, man…I’m really sorry…” Zitao said after a second. “I should’ve listened to your side of the story before I started blaming you… I also….kind of got a little jealous because you’ve known Jongdae-hyung for much longer than I have.”

Jongdae looked over at Zitao. “Aw. You were jealous of Minseok-hyung? That’s so cute.”

Minseok stared at Jongdae. “Wait. I’ve been noticing this the whole day…Zitao-shi hasn’t left your side since you got here. And I thought it was because you were blind and he kinda just…guided you around. But…you guys seem incredibly close…”

Jongdae blinked. “You didn’t notice…?”

Minseok shook his head. “No…”

“Oh…” Jongdae said. He looked at Zitao. “We’re dating. And have been for…a week or two now.”

Word Count: 1717

Okay. So this is like an...intervention/confession chapter or something. Also a realization for Minseok, who, as I mentioned, used to have a crush on Jongdae, that Jongdae is a taken man now. Idk about the ending. But. Whatever. I hope you enjoyed this~ 

Until next time~

<3