HAPPY BIRTHDAY to a-flowingheat!  Have a great day, dear!  (Or should that be deer?)

Deer Luhan,

In Korea, I was kind of scared of Suho because he was just a really bossy grumpy fart the entire time, but I find the fact that he just bought plane tickets for everybody without asking why they were freaking out super sweet.

He is also the ONLY one of you not to assume I’m dating Sehun.  That makes Suho my bias.  Can I keep him?

Leigh

Letting go of Tao’s hand, Kris stepped up and took control in typical Kris fashion.

“What the flying are you guys doing here?” he demanded.

Suho blinked at him.

“I have no idea,” he admitted.  “This lot have been freaking out about you guys since Monday evening.  Everybody’s been talking about kidnappings and murders; Kai was crying about Luhan in his sleep and Baekhyun hasn’t slept at all, so I cancelled as many schedules as I could behind our managers’ backs, bought plane tickets, and we ditched and came here at the first opportunity.  And now I’m just horrifically confused.”

He picked the orange juice up again and sniffed at it.  “D.O., does this smell of alcohol to you?”

Looking like he’d just been put in front of a firing squad, D.O. took the juice off him, but his eyes never left me and Luhan.

Chen was the one who broke the tension.

“ yes!” he exclaimed.  “Korean amnesty!”

“Ko-what?” asked Suho, taking the juice back off D.O., who had assured him there wasn’t even the faintest trace of absinthe in it.  “Am I actually drunk?  I can only see two of Luhan.  There’s one of everybody else.”

Chanyeol appeared from the kitchen doorway.

“There’s only one of you, too,” Suho added.

“Oh, sh*t!”  Chanyeol covered his mouth.  “We totally forgot to tell Suho!”

“Tell me what, exactly?”  Suho eyed him for a few moments, then decided the orange juice probably was safe and finished drinking it.

“Wait.”  Xiumin spoke up before anybody else could.  “You mean you haven’t heard the news about Luhan’s twin brother?”

Suho narrowed his eyes at him, and then at me and Luhan.  He knew as well as the rest of EXO did that Luhan didn’t have any siblings, let alone a twin.

“So you’re saying you two are identical twin brothers?”  His tone was the definition of sceptical.

“Uh… no,” Luhan admitted.  “We’re actually not related at all.”

The bathroom door opened at that moment and Baekhyun came out.  He did a double take when he saw us all standing there.

“Whoa.  Thought you’d be back later,” he said.  “Hi, guys.  Hi, Leigh!  Which one of you is which?”

“Nuh-uh!”  Lay smiled gently at him.  “You are not getting it the easy way.  We’ve had to put up with these terrors pretending to be each other for days.”

Baekhyun looked between the two of us, contemplating for a while and pointing from me to Luhan.  Then he dropped his hand.

“ my mind,” he muttered, pulling out his phone and texting as he disappeared into the kitchen.

“My mind is ed,” D.O. agreed.

“Baek!” I yelled.  “You do know there was a dead body in there last Monday, right?”

“Eww!” he bellowed back.  “Why tell me that about the eating place, Leigh?”

“What?” Luhan called back to him.  I was a little surprised that Baekhyun had caught me just from a simple comment, but I tried not to let it show.

Suho watched the little exchange, his head going back and forth between us and the kitchen.  “Somebody mind explaining what’s going on?”

“Well, basically,” said Chanyeol, “you remember how Luhan was acting weird when we got back from tour?”

“What, with the concussion?”

“Yeah.  That’s because he wasn’t Luhan.”  Chanyeol pointed to Luhan.  “He’s Leigh.  Except he’s a she.  And he’s Luhan.”  He pointed at me.

I grinned.  “Actually, I’m Leigh.”

Luhan tugged on my arm.  “Xiao Lu, don’t be mean.”

I puffed my cheeks out and blew air in his face.  “Whatever you say, Xiao Lu.”

Luhan retreated with a laugh.

Chanyeol dropped his arm.  “, my mind.”

The dorm door opened behind us and a low chuckle that I was pretty sure belonged to Kai came down the hallway.  We all turned to look, and sure enough, the two youngest boys in EXO were taking their shoes off and plonking them haphazardly on the shoe rack.  Neither appeared to notice anything particularly abnormal until they were both alongside the rest of us, because they were too busy laughing over something Kai had apparently done earlier.

“Hey, guys!” enthused Chen.  “We’ve got a great game for you!  It’s called Spot the Luhan!”

“This is such a mind ,” Suho protested on the maknaes’ behalf as the two boys registered we were there.  They both did a double take.

“Total mind ,” Kai concurred with a mumble, nodding.  “Sehun should be able to tell them apart.  True love and all that.”

Sehun looked over us again after giving Kai an obligatory punch to the shoulder (which Kai almost evaded), his bottom  lip nervously.  His eyes flickered between Suho and Kris, and then me and Luhan, and then around at the rest of us as though he was unsure of what to do.  Then he decided to bite the bullet and stepped forward.

“Luhan hyung,” he said without hestation, pointing to Luhan.  “And Leigh.”

“D*mn you, kid.”  Luhan sounded mildly amused.

“Oh my gosh.”  Kai blinked.  “Are you telling me this true love thing actually works?”

Sehun scratched the back of his head, abashed, and his tongue appeared between his lips again.

“No,” he admitted.  “It’s just that Luhan seemed terrified when he first saw me and Leigh didn’t, and I don’t know why Leigh would have been terrified whereas I did tell Luhan I’d bite his head off when I next saw him in person.”

“No need to argue!” Chen trilled.  “Leigh has a fantastic method for getting people to make up.  Luhan, punch him!”  He shoved Luhan towards Sehun.

“What?” Luhan protested, looking back over his shoulder at him. “Why?”

Suho and D.O. both got up from the sofa.

“Are you sure this is going to work?” D.O. asked.

“Yeah!  It’s called punch, punch, pub!” Chen told him in English.  “Luhan punches Sehun, Sehun punches Luhan, and then they both drink a pint of beer and all their problems are solved.”

Confused, Sehun turned to me.  “What the is this?”

“It worked with Xiumin,” Chen added, still trying to propel Luhan into hitting distance of Sehun.  Luhan resisted with all his might.

“Yes, but Sehun holds grudges!” he objected.

“And I’m nursing a ing big one right now,” Sehun agreed.  “You don’t go involving innocent people in your sh*t, Luhan.”

Luhan flinched and fell still.  Chen didn’t stop pushing, though, and he ended up in Sehun’s arms.  There was a familiar call of “HunHan is Ree Lee real!”

“You’re lucky Leigh’s awesome,” Sehun grumbled at Luhan.  “We’ll talk later.”

It sounded like a threat: apparently no number of phone conversations w