AN: …Internet is still being stupid. 

THE NEXT NIGHT:

After traveling all day and making sure Daehyun and Minah had gotten to their grandparents all right, Taemin found himself nervous as he stood outside the dorm building. The lights in the dorm were on, and Taemin assumed since he took his dear sweet time leaving the siblings that his hyungs were now home from all their schedules.

He had cold feet. He didn’t want to go in there. No matter how confident he felt that he had let Jinki go, he still didn’t want to see him. He looked down at his phone seeing Daehyun text him.

From:  Daehyun-ah

To: Taemin

10:13:12 PM

Message: You can do it. I know you can hyung! I’m here if you need anything!

Taemin smiled, feeling slightly better. He read the text once more before squaring his shoulders and forcing himself inside the building. He took slow steps to the elevator, making sure he wasn’t seen by any of his label mates along the way.

He wasn’t sure how long he stood in front of the door to his dorm, just listening to his hyungs yell on the inside. He heard Jonghyun’s teasing voice while Kibum and Jinki obviously bickered.

The maknae reached up, setting his hand on the doorknob. This was it. It was the moment of truth. Here he’d either walk in and find himself completely protected, or he’d break. He turned it and pushed open the door. The voices went eerily quiet as he stepped through, shuffling his shoes off with his bags tightly in his hands.

Jonghyun was the first up in the living room, rushing through the hall to the front door. Kibum and Jinki were on his heels with Minho bringing up the rear. Taemin kept his head down as he took off his coat. He would not be the one to talk first.

“Taemin!”

The maknae looked up and despite seeing both Jinki and Minho staring at him, he didn’t feel anything. Jonghyun rushed towards him, wrapping his arms around him and hugging him tightly.

“Tae-baby!” Kibum didn’t waste time either by running and joining the two in the hug.

Taemin slowly felt the other two join in the hug, their arms wrapping around him from behind. He forced himself not to care. He forced himself to smile when Kibum pulled away for a moment.

“Look at you! I swear you look so much better than you did before!”

Taemin only cared to look at Jonghyun and Kibum, “I feel much better than before.”

It wasn’t a lie, he really did. He then turned to Minho and Jinki.

The rapper was smirking at him, “Welcome home, Tae!”

Taemin grimaced as he hugged him, but replied, “Thanks, Hyung.”

Minho let go and the three waited while Jinki and Taemin stared at each other, waiting for the other to say anything.

Jinki eventually opened his arms, “Do I get a hug, too?”

Taemin bit his lip, “Neh, Hyung.”

Taemin let the elder hug him and for a moment, he let himself sigh in the wonderful scent Jinki had. Jonghyun and Kibum nervously waited for some kind of yelling, but Taemin simply pulled away when he couldn’t handle it anymore. He smiled though, seeing Minho take his place next to Jinki, wrapping his arm around the elder’s waist.

The maknae thought they looked…weird together. Minho was taller, but Jinki was more built, and he couldn’t help but wonder who topped and bottomed. He quickly shook off the thought,.

“Yah, you two look closer. How’s everything going for you?”

Minho and Jinki looked at each other for a moment and Jinki simply looked away, too upset to say anything.

The rapper sighed, “We’re doing fine. We’re just happy you’re home.”

Taemin looked at Jinki once more before feeling his phone vibrate in his hand. He squealed at the text and then peered at his hyung, “I’m glad to be home!” He turned to Jonghyun, “You owe me dinner, Hyung.”

“Aish, I know. Grab your coat.”

Minho tugged on Jinki, “We should have breakfast together in the morning so you can tell us about your travels.”

“I’d like that,” Taemin said softly, smiling as much as he could.

Jinki whimpered when Minho pulled him away, before the atmosphere could get anymore awkward, and Taemin was grateful for that. Kibum clung to his arm as Jonghyun took the two out for a later dinner, assuming Taemin hadn’t eaten on the train.

They sat in a small restaurant, the dorm umma refusing to leave Taemin’s side.

 “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Neh, Umma, I’m okay.”

Jonghyun stared at him and for a brief second, he caught a flash of sadness in the boy’s eyes. He was okay, sure, but the pain was still there, threatening to take over. He may feel strong, but he was only as strong as the people around him. Taemin patted Kibum’s arm.

 “I’m fine, Umma, I promise."

“So you won’t disappear if I leave to go to the restroom real quick?”

Taemin chuckled, “No, I’ll be right here.”

Kibum quickly dashed up and away from the table, leaving Taemin with Jonghyun. The elder sighed.

 “What you mean is you’ll be fine if you don’t always have to see Jinki and Minho together, right?” 

Taemin frowned, “Do you know how hard I want to stop loving Jinki? I wish it would be so easy to just let him go and maybe find someone else who could love me just as much.”

The singer sighed, “You’re not leaving again, are you?”

“No. My place is here and just because those two are together now doesn’t mean I have to leave.” Taemin looked at Jonghyun, his eyes serious and dark. “I will always love Jinki. I can’t stop that, but I will never deny him happiness should he seek it somewhere other than with me.”

“You’re more patient than I would ever be, Tae-ah.” Jonghyun leaned back in his seat. “I’ll be there for you. I promise.”

Taemin smiled weakly and nodded, silently thanking Jonghyun. Kibum returned, a look of panic on his face at first, but then happiness. He had been scared Taemin would bolt again, leaving them alone. As his unofficial umma, he would make sure Taemin was happy through this situation, there was no other option.

The three ate together quietly, Taemin telling them the sights he saw and people he talked to. He blushed when he talked about the two fans he met and how close he became with them. Kibum demanded to meet them soon, since he was convinced Taemin may have a tiny crush on one. Back at the dorm, it was quiet when they returned. Kibum hugged Taemin, before rushing off to shower with a smile on his face. Jonghyun followed Taemin to his room, talking with him as he unpacked. Taemin took out a small package and handed it to Jonghyun.

“Here, it's for you and Umma.”

“What is it?” Jonghyun asked, unwrapping it.

It was a small treasure box, with both his and Kibum’s intials marked into it.

Jonghyun smiled, “You didn’t have to.” 

“But I did,” Taemin said.

He put three more packages in his dresser as Jonghyun quietly left the room, returning with a pair of headphones in his hands. Taemin raised an eyebrow when he handed it to him.

“What’s this?”

“Trust me, you’re going to need it. Jinki’s a…”

They heard the scream that ripped through the dorm, and Jonghyun watched Taemin carefully. The maknae flinched for a second before schooling his face.

“Ahh, I see what you mean.”

Well, that answered his earlier question. He never pictured Jinki screaming like that. Jonghyun pulled the maknae close, hugging him.

“If it gets too much for you…”

“I know. I can always go stay with my parents if I need to. I’m not running away though, Hyung. Kibum-umma needs me here.”

“Just…know I’m here,” Jonghyun said.

And he would stick to that promise. He would help Taemin with whatever he needed, distract him in any way. Taemin quietly nodded.

“I’m going to try and sleep for a few hours. I promised Jongin and Heechul that I’d visit tomorrow.” 

Jonghyun nodded, leaving the room silently. He shut the door quietly, giving Taemin the privacy he needed. He passed by Minho’s room and pounded on the door.

“SHUT UP. I WANT TO SLEEP TONIGHT, THANK YOU.”

Taemin chuckled hearing the yell.

“Thanks, Hyung.”

He quietly put on the noise cancelling earphones, glad Jonghyun let him borrow them for the night. He’d have to go out and get his own tomorrow. He quietly trailed over to the dresser and gazed at the packages hidden away. He wasn’t sure when the right time would be to give them to his last two hyungs, but he tried not to fret about it.

He quietly called Daehyun, smiling when the boy picked up.

“Did it go alright, Hyung?”

“Uhh, I guess? It was awkward,” Taemin said settling on his bed, nuzzled in the covers. It felt weird to be back in his room after so long, but it was a welcomed feeling. He missed his dorm and living with his hyungs. Taemin smiled, “What are you up to?”

“Just tucked Minah in for the night. She told me to tell you good night if you called.”

“I missed her? Dang…” Taemin giggled when the boy started to panic, apologizing. “Hush, Daehyunnie. It’s fine.”

The boy went quiet on the other line, “You don’t sound okay, Taemin-hyung…I mean, I know we don’t-”

“Just…talk to me, okay?” Taemin asked.

He just wanted a distraction. Daehyun babbled on the other line, telling Taemin how his grandparents wanted to meet him and asked if he was really a celebrity before moving on to other random topics. Taemin found himself settling down, his heart returning to a normal pace instead of the rapid one it had been since he walked through the door.

“Hyung?”

Taemin yawned, “Neh?”

“Are you going to be okay? If you don’t want to stay there you can come here…I know that pres-”

“I know ,Daehyun-ah, thank you.” Taemin yawned. “I should try to get some sleep. I have to resume my schedule tomorrow and catch up. Did you want to meet up in the morning?”

“Neh! Just call me when you want to meet up. Minah would be glad to see you,” Daehyun said quietly.

Taemin smiled, “Thanks for being there.”

“Anytime. Night ,Taemin-hyung.”

Taemin yawned, “Night, Daehyunnie.”

He hung up after that, putting in his ear buds and then the noise cancelling headphones on top. He didn’t hear the pleasured screams from his ex lover nor the screams from an irritated Jonghyun and Kibum. A smile slowly crossed on his face as exhaustion hit him, allowing him to sleep without worry.

THE NEXT MORNING:

The four eldest members of SHINee sat around the kitchen table, quietly eating. Taemin hadn’t come out of his room yet and Jonghyun could see it was starting to make the leader fidget. Minho had a large smile on his face as he rubbed Jinki’s arm.

“We should take Taemin out this morning.”

Kibum smiled, “That’s a wonderful idea!”

He moved to go wake the maknae up when they heard a door open and a giggle follow.

“No! He’d kill you, Daehyunnie! I’ll come to you.”

Taemin rushed into the kitchen with the phone attached to his ear, throwing an arm around Jonghyun, “Thank you for last night, Hyung. I’ll go get my own headphones today.”

Minho peered at the maknae, “In a rush?”

Taemin grabbed a banana from the table, “Neh! Bye, Hyungs!” he said quickly, giving Kibum a hug and returning the receiver to his mouth. “I’m on my way, Daehyunnie! Tell Minah her favorite oppa is coming!”

The front door slammed after that, leaving the four members speechless. Jinki was the first to get up and go to the window, before they all followed. Taemin rushed out onto the sidewalk and to a boy standing across the street. A little girl rushed at Taemin, hugging his legs tightly as he leaned down and hugged her in return.

Jonghyun smiled, “So that must be him…”

Jinki looked at the singer, “Who? Who is that?”

“Taemin’s little crush. He probably didn’t want us to meet him yet.”

“T-Taemin’s crush?!” Jinki cried.

Minho grabbed his waist, pulling him close, “He moved on, Hyung, it’s what we wanted. So what if he has a crush on a fan?”

It mattered to Jinki. It mattered that this meant he would probably be spending more and more time away from them…from him. Taemin just got back and he was being avoided?

Kibum crossed his arms, “Yah, that boy better not hurt him.”

Jonghyun was smiling. He was happy Taemin was not moping around at least. He nudged Minho.

“You two should take a day to yourselves. Taemin told me last night he’d be out all day anyway. Jongin and Heechul have plans with him and I believe manager-hyung wanted to see him later to catch him up on his schedule.”

Minho smiled brightly, dragging the leader away from the window and out the front door. He would gladly take an opportunity to distract his boyfriend.

Jonghyun sighed when the front door slammed shut again. Kibum peered over at his boyfriend.

 “It’s going to be like this, isn’t it?”

“Unfortunately, yes. Until Taemin feels comfortable again, he’s probably going to avoid being in their presence unless he has to.”

Kibum threw his arms up, “I’m going to kill them later. THIS IS THEIR FAULT.”

He stormed away from his lover, leaving the singer in his spot.

“Well…this ought be interesting.”

Taemin, for his part, had fun that morning. He treated the siblings to some breakfast, and then walked with Daehyun to the university he would be going to. Minah never let go of his hand, and his face was covered so he didn’t care. He had just started to walk Daehyun and Minah home when his phone vibrated.

From: Heechul-hyung

To: Taemin

09:45:22 AM

Message: YAH! COME OVER. I WANT TO SEE MY TAEMIN.

Daehyun chuckled, “One of your band mates?”

“Ehh, one of my label mates, actually. I never really told them all why I left.”

He sighed and put his phone in pocket. They stopped up at the curb and Minah tugged on Taemin’s hand.

“Oppa?”

“Neh, sweetie?”

“Will you come spend time with us soon?”

Taemin kneeled down in front of her.

“Of course I will. You start school soon along with your oppa, but I promise to come spend a lot of time with you.” 

Minah smiled at that and kissed Taemin’s cheek, running up the stairs and into the house so her oppas could say goodbye.

Taemin blushed as he stood up, “She’s adorable.”

“That she is…” Daehyun rubbed his arm. “So I probably won’t see you for awhile…”

Taemin shrugged at that, “I think you’ll see me sooner than you think.”

Taemin blushed when the younger stepped forward and hugged him. “Call me if you need to, okay, Hyung?” 

Taemin smiled, returning the hug. “Of course. I’ll be texting you as soon as I leave.”

Daehyun smiled and blushed in return when he let go. Taemin watched him skip inside his house, shutting the door quietly. Taemin walked along after that, heading back to the dorm building. He avoided his own dorm and headed straight to the Super Junior dorm. He barely had to knock before the door opened and three pairs of hands grabbed him and pulled him inside.

“YAH!”

“TAEMIN-AH!!” Heechul yelled, trapping him in a hug.

Both Eunhyuk and Donghae were the next to hug him, tugging him over to the couch.

Taemin looked around, “Where’s everyone else?”

Heechul shrugged, “Who knows? Kyuhyun’s probably in his room and I think everyone else is out.”

Donghae patted his leg, “Yah, do you know why Minho’s avoiding me? I can’t seem to get him to come over anymore.”

“H-he…didn’t tell you?” Taemin asked.

Now this was absurd. Minho and Donghae were close. Eunhyuk and Donghae looked at each other.

“What happened ,Taemin?”

“He and Jinki-hyung…wel-well…they’re dating now…”

Heechul’s face went dark.

“But YOU’RE dating Jinki…right?”

Taemin shook his head, “Ani…he broke up with me.” 

The three elders looked at each other. “Is that why you’ve been gone? Everyone freaked out when you just disappeared in the middle of the night.”

“Jonghyun-hyung told me to get away, so I did…and it was nice,” Taemin said.

He didn’t want to talk about this. He wanted a distraction. Heechul sensed it and changed the topic, telling the boy of all he missed while he was away. They ended up watching a movie as well, and Taemin was glad that Heechul didn’t leave his side. He was glad for the protective elder, even if it was just for a few minutes.

When the time came for Taemin to leave, Donghae hugged him tight.

“If you want to come over here, you’re always welcome. We have room for you.”

“Thanks, Hyung. I’ll remember that.”

Heechul patted his head, “You and I will go out this weekend. I must meet this cute little fan-boy of yours.”

Taemin blushed when he realized that Heechul had been reading the conversation he had been having with Daehyun. He nodded, skipping out of the dorm and back to his own. He hoped Jinki and Minho were out, but luck wasn’t with him. He heard the yelling from outside the door and he sighed. He was causing this issue.

Taemin opened the door, sighing when they didn’t stop yelling. He quickly slipped off his shoes and went to the living room, seeing both Kibum and Jinki at each other’s throats, and Minho and Jonghyun in the same state. He was annoyed that they didn’t seem to know he was there.

“YAH!!” 

The four stopped their yelling and peered at the maknae as he walked closer.

“What the hell is wrong with you four? We are a band, why are we fighting?”

Kibum had tears in his eyes, “You know exactly why we’re fighting, Taemin.”

The dancer sighed, rubbing his forehead. “Dammit…” He looked at the leader. “We need to talk.”

Jinki glared, reaching out and grabbing his wrist. He pulled Taemin out of the dorm and up the stairs to the roof. Taemin showed no emotion on his face at the place his leader had chosen. Why here of all places?

When the roof door shut, Jinki turned around and stared him down.

“What gave you any right to leave, Taemin? We needed you here.”

“We? WE?” Taemin contained the urge not to slap his ex. He shut his eyes and took in a deep breath, “I needed to get away from you.”

“So it was because of me.”

 Did being with Minho all the intelligance out of his head?

“No , Jinki! You think I want to be around while Minho s you? You dumped me. No one in their right mind would want to stay around their ex and his new boyfriend right after getting their heart broken!”

The leader was taken aback. He had never heard Taemin let out his emotions like this. It was the one thing he had craved when they dated. Taemin never trusted him with anything, and to find out the only way to get that was to dump him?

Jinki frowned, “Where was this before? Why did you never open up to me when we were together?” 

Taemin sighed at the soft voice. He had dreaded this conversation, but he also knew it was essential if he wanted to fully get over this situation.

“I don’t know…it took losing you to realize that I have no choice but to be confident.”

“All…I ever wanted from you was for you to open up to me. You never trusted me enough to do that.”

“Do you want me to say sorry? Because I can’t do anything about it now, Jinki.”

Taemin watched Jinki trail over to the railing, frustration on his face. The maknae realized this situation was screwed up, but he couldn’t change what had happened.

“Jinki…”

“Damn you, Taemin. Why?” Jinki whirled around, his eyes on fire.

Taemin swallowed nervously as he walked back towards him, pinning him against the door. He knew there was chemistry between them, and probably always would be. Jinki stared him down.

 “I never wanted to ing hurt you.”

“Well, you did,” Taemin spat in return. He was pissed now. “You left me for Minho of all ing people, and I’m not one to play second fiddle.”

“Tae…”

“Let me go, Jinki.”

The leader did as he was told, backing away slightly from the younger. Taemin sighed, rubbing his forehead once more.

“We can’t change what happened, Jinki, and it was obvious you weren’t happy with me.”

Jinki opened his mouth to object when Taemin held up a hand.

“You deserve a chance to see how things with Minho go. It’s why I left, so I wouldn’t stand in your way.” He looked up at Jinki now, “And I won’t stand in your way. Let nature take it’s course for now. If you and I have a future together then maybe someday it will happen.”

“I was hurt, too, Taemin. I still love you,” Jinki said quietly, hoping the maknae would understand him.

And in a way, Taemin did. The words sent shivers down Taemin’s spine, but he remained composed.

“I will always love you in return, Jinki, but we can’t do this right now. You and I are both still hurt and not meant to be with each other at the moment.”

“Then what the hell are we supposed to do?”

Taemin smiled, “Live. Be with Minho, fall in love with him and maybe even forget about me.”

“I don’t want to, though,” Jinki softly grabbed Taemin’s hand. “I want you.”

“In this state? No, you don’t.” Taemin patted the leader’s cheek, “Everything will fall into place, Hyung, don’t force it. Be happy right now, because you have Minho. He loves you.”

Jinki didn't deny it. “You love me, Taemin.”

“But it’s not enough for you. Not as much as Minho can give you right now.”

Taemin weakly smiled, but he was on a roll. He was getting everything off his chest and into the open air. Taemin leaned up on his tiptoes, lightly kissing the elder’s lips. He pulled away before Jinki had the chance to respond.

“I love you, Jinki, that won’t change, but if we truly love each other, then fate will bring us back together, just not when we’re both so hurt by the other.” Taemin opened the door and pointed, “Now go apologize to Umma, and tell him I’m alright. Go be with Minho.”

“And you, Taemin? What about you?”

Taemin smiled, “I’ll be fine, just go.”

Taemin squeezed his hand and let go then, watching the elder fade down the stairs. The maknae shoved the door shut and slumped down to the ground, letting his heart break. He had meant every word he'd said and he hoped Jinki realized that. He couldn’t give Jinki what he wanted right now, but maybe someday he could.

AN: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I HAVE NO INTERNET. –pouts and grumbles-