Time jump of a week

Almost a week had passed since the ‘incident’, but Jiyong was still on edge. As soon as the doors closed in the lecture hall and everyone was silent, he felt as if there was a pulsing energy sparking inside of him. Like how a flame sparks just before it ignites. It wasn’t warming or comforting though, really, it felt like blocks of ice were freezing his organs and closing his windpipe. He often felt unable to breathe and Youngbae was the only one to calm him down and melt the ice inside of him. Youngbae was like his own personal sun in a way.

He managed to get through though. How? He doesn’t have a clue, but Jiyong somehow did. It was getting easier to bear as the days went on. Today, he almost felt like his old self, or as close as he possibly could. He’d felt a welcomed cloud of numbness seep into him. He was starting to feel less and less, and he could see Youngbae getting worried at his lack of responsiveness. He needed to get out into the real world, but he really didn’t have the energy to be bothered to interact with people and keep a conversation going. He sighed, lying down on his desk.

Briiinnnnggg

The shrill sound of the bell jolted Jiyong out of his thoughts and his chair. He quickly gathered his books and ran down the stairs hoping to avoid any contact with people, when suddenly a tan, muscled arm was blocking his escape. He slowly turned his head to find Dongwook- his former friend- casually stood there with a subtle smirk on his lips.

“Hey Ji why are you in such a rush? Hot date? Not like you to bunk off is it.”

Jiyong tried to hide his scowl by layering a mask of nonchalance on his face.

“Nope,” He simply said, but his eyes were daring him to try and argue.

Dongwook raised an eyebrow but chose to ignore the bait. “Anyway, that’s not why I’m here. What I was really going to ask was if you and Youngbae would like to come with me and a couple of friends to Scarlet Moon tonight. I’ll pay for everything.”

“Yeah that sounds great!” Youngbae exclaimed, causing Jiyong to jump in surprise. Jiyong widened his eyes at Youngbae with a panicked look. Youngbae turned to Jiyong, “Look, Ji, you really need to get out and ing live your life!” He then softened his voice so only Jiyong could hear, “Nothing has happened since Ji, I think it’s time you started to control your own life. Remember our motto yeah?”

Jiyong saw the pleading look in Youngbae’s eyes and guilt washed over him. God, he was such a ty and pathetic friend!

But no matter how much guilt there was, the fear was stronger. Misery was clear in his eyes as he shook his head at Youngbae, no words being able to come out.

He roughly pushed past them both, keeping his eyes lowered so not to see their faces and rushed to his next class.

The rest of the day passed in a silent blur since he had no other lessons with Youngbae and for that he was very relieved; he couldn’t bear to see the look of disappointment and worry on his face again.

As soon as the bell went for the end of the school day, Jiyong was out of the classroom in a flash and walked -almost ran- to the school gates. Which beyond, he could look forward to wollowing in his pitiful emotions.

It was still better than the alternative though.

However, despite his speed, Youngbae was there leaning against the glossy black gates loyally waiting for him like he usually does.

Jiyong thought about sneaking round him, but really what was the point? It was better to face this now than later.

So he straightened his shoulders, lifted his chin and strode, what he hoped looked confidently, towards Youngbae.

When Youngbae saw Jiyong, a smile lit up his face, which only caused the darkness of guilt to cloud over him again. Even after everything, he was still happy to see him.

“Hi Ji!”

“Um hi.”

“Soooo how was the rest of your day?”

“Good.”

“Did you do well on that Lit exam? You revised so hard for it.”

“Yeah, I did alright.”

The two looked at each other after a moment, Jiyong wary and Youngbae frowning. The conversation dropped to an awkward silence as they walked down the road.

“You know this is what I’m on about when I say how you’ve changed. We used to be able to talk to each other for hours about absolutely anything, now you’re so distant with me. Don’t get me wrong, I understand that you’ve been through a lot this past week and I understand if you’re like this to other people, but to me?” Youngbae shook his head, despair etched in the lines of his face. “I’m not going to go away Jiyong, I’m going to fight for you even if you don’t yourself. I don’t think you realise how much you mean to me. That’s why I think that going out with Dongwook and everyone will be good for you. You need to stop letting fear control your life. You go out basically every week to Scarlet Moon, what will be different this time?"

Jiyong stood there frozen. Youngbae was never the one for speeches, or confessing his feelings so this was not what he was expecting.

Youngbae’s words were still echoing through his mind so he didn’t realise he said it until he saw Youngbae staring at him in shock.

“Ok I’ll go.” Jiyong repeated, his voice stronger now that he knew what he was saying.

Youngbae tried to mask his surprise and happiness, but Jiyong could see it shining in his eyes. “Ok, I’ll text Dongwook then.”

They rounded the corner to where they go their separate ways, Youngbae’s eyes still sparkling as he said “See you tonight!”, but all Jiyong could feel was nerves and the old feeling of fear, stained and crusted on his body.

He knew it was irrational. I mean, it wouldn’t kill anyone if he goes out and enjoys himself. Would it?

Sorry this was a little late but i hope you enjoyed XD