I woke up when I felt someone shaking me. I got up slowly and rubbed my hair. Was it morning yet? Has Hansol return home already? I opened my eyes, soon narrowing them on the person in front of me.

He shook his head immediately. “Why are you sleeping on the couch here without a blanket or a jacket? It was cold yesterday night, and it’s getting colder today.” Hansol said, placing his jacket over my shoulder. 

With no reasons, I felt my anger coming from my stomach and rising to my head. Hansol seemed to know what’s going on as he took a step back, soon sitting beside me. He the television, no hint of explaining where he was the night before. I switched off the television once he placed the remote controller on the table.

Hansol stared at me hard. I used to be able to read his eyes. I can tell how he is feeling whenever I look into his eyes. But today, it’s a little different. I cannot tell what it is trying to tell me. It is as if I have lost contact with it. I gulped under his intimate stare, feeling that I have just grown much more smaller than before. 

Hansol soon joined me, frowning, and his lip is in a tight line. I was waiting for him to speak, but he soon left the couch. I didn’t want this, I wanted an explanation — an explanation of where he went the last night. I followed him into our bedroom. Looking at that back I used to love, today, it seemed a little different and I hadn’t realised why.

“Shouldn’t you give me an explanation?” I heard him snorted lightly.

“About what?” 

It was my turn to snort. “Are you kidding me? You have no idea what you did? What, are you drunk?” I said, anger replaced whatever emotions I had earlier on. 

Hansol turned back and looked at me with a cold stare. I was shocked. Did he really not want to explain? Why is he looking at me like this? He have not look at me with this stare before, never. 

“I have some things on. Didn’t Jiho told you about it? I told him to inform you, and he said he will.” He said, turning back, focusing on the closet instead of me. 

“Yeah, he did. But why can’t you tell it to me by yourself? Hansol, we’re dating for goodness’ sake! I am not dating Jiho, I am dating you! Can’t you give me a call, or at least a text message instead of passing it to Jiho and then Jiho come telling me about it?” I sighed, sitting down on the bed. 

Hansol stopped whatever he was doing, it seemed like he’s finally taking this chat seriously. He knows it well whenever I call him by his name it means serious chat. And he will never, I mean never, never fool around whenever we get into a serious chat.

I let my fingers ran through my hair, combing it backwards the way Hansol liked. “I am getting tired, Hansol-ah, I am. We’re not getting any better, not like what you said you want us to be a month ago.” I said, getting teary. “I really want to know what’s wrong, and how should I mend this up. You know how much I treasure this relationship and you, you know how much I—”

“Let’s break up then.” he said, merciless.

“W-what?”

He turned around and faced me, filled with coldness. “If you’re getting tired then let’s break up; so that you don’t have to tolerate whatever you’re getting. So that you can always have Jiho to accompany you; so that you don’t have to always wait for me; so that you… don’t have to love me.” he said, head tilting down, looking on the floor. 

I stood up slowly, walking towards him. 

“Is that what you really mea