Are we there yet? (hell no)
Block B's Big Road Trip Flop [hiatus]"Are we there yet, Jiho?" Jihoon whined for the umpteenth time, wading through the endless fields of corn. Jiho had decided to take his mortal enemies best friends to a real live farm where they could milk cows and do wholesome farm things that country people were supposed to do.
"No, Jihoon. My strong sense of direction and great leadership skills tell me that we still have a good mile to go." Jiho said, keeping his eyes on the map and not he trail ahead of him.
"Jiho, you're holding the map upside down, you ." Kyung pointed out, flipping the map around right-side-up. Yukwon and Minhyuk snickered behind cupped hands and Jaehyo rolled his eyes for the umpteenth time.
"Good job, Oh Amazing Leader." Taeil said with as much sarcasm as a tiny fish loving boy could. Everyone stared at him as if he was out of his mind. "What? Jiho at reading maps!"
"It's true. Jiho's map skills are worse than Minhyuk's dating game." Jaehyo grinned, flicking his bangs to the side. Minhyuk frowned deeply, his face turning beet red.
"But Jaehyo, you've been single for years!" Yukwon exclaimed, wrapping his arms around Minhyuk. Yukwon had been tonnes happier ever since Sunhye had texted him, mind you it was a five word text, but a text is a text.
"No, I have a girlfriend, Naeun." Jaehyo grinned proudly, smiling widely enough to show off all of his teeth.
"Just because Naeun said hi to you on that one variety show doesn't mean she likes you or she's dating you." Kyung sighed, trying to peek over the tops of the ridiculously tall cornstalks.
"Oh, she's my girlfriend alright. She just doesn't know it yet." Jaehyo laughed a little too evilly, revealing himself to be a psychotic A-Pink fanboy. Huh, that's why Taemin never emailed me back about the whole dance collaboration thing. Minhyuk thought to himself.
"Delusional fanboy!" Taeil, Kyung and Minhyuk chorused. Jaehyo frowned, looking around for something to whack his annoying bandmates with. You try being cooped up with a bunch of trolls for years and not want to kill someone once a week.
"Is West ia all farmland?" Jihoon asked no one in particular, staring at the miles upon miles upon miles of farmland. Most of the plots were growing corn or okra, making it almost impossible to see through them. It was like walking through ridiculously tall and itchy grass.
"I think so." Jiho mumbled, holding the map sideways. He, along with the rest of his dorky bandmates, had absolutely no idea where the hell they were going. It didn't exactly help that Jiho spoke little to no English and that he was more stubborn than your average mule. Trying to make any sense of where they had been, where they were at that moment and where they needed to go was almost impossible.
"Someone get me a knife, I can't wait for natural causes. Jiho's stupidity is going to eventually cause the end of the world." Kyung shrieked, ramming himself into a particularly tall cornstalk. Minhyuk whistled and did the universal "coocoo" hand sign. Taeil mumbled something about the heat getting to him.
After an hour of meaningless trekking through the cornfield, Jaehyo was about ready to give up. They had been walking through the fields for a good hour and a half. Taeil claimed his glasses were melting in the summer heat. Jihoon had started talking about unicorns, making his friend's wonder if Jihoon was suffering from heat exhaustion or just being normal by his oddball standards. Yukwon and Minhyuk had reverted back to their old annoying selves, which wasn't much of a difference from before. Jaehyo was picking at his nails, which worried the others as Jaehyo was going to take out his anger over his messed up nails at one of them, and none of them were exactly in the mood for being mortally wounded. Jiho was still trying to read the map, which really was a horrible idea in general. Kyung was unusually quiet, not choosing to be snarky but was instead running around like a psycho.
"Dear sweet son of Buddha, we've been out here for too long. The vultures are starting to circle. We're gonna die!" Taeil screamed, clutching on to Jaehyo's shoulder as if he was drowning. Jaehyo stared up at the sky, noticing the vultures circling them.
"JUDGEMENT DAY IS HERE!" Jaehyo screamed, practically tackling Taeil with a hug as the two walked. Jiho looked at them with a look that screamed "are you ing kidding me?". Kyung shrugged towards Jiho for a response. The vultures continued to circle, growing ever closer.
"I can't believe its going to end like this! I never got to tell Sunhye I loved her!" Yukwon screamed towards the heavens, falling on his knees. To say the least, Yukwon was overdramatic.
"But you tell Sunhye you love her everytime you two go on a date or call eachother." Jihoon said, making some actual sense for once. Kyung and Jiho nodded in agreement. Yukwon was known for being melodramatic as a trainee, and that continued all the way up through idolhood.
"You think that's bad? What about me?! I'm going to die alone, without a girlfriend, in the middle of a huge farm! HOW DOES THAT FEEL, YUKWON?!" Minhyuk screamed, hopping up and down. If you thought Yukwon was the dramatic one, then you have never seen Minhyuk. Minhyuk might seem calm and composed at times, but he was secretly dramatic and extremely gullible to boot. Fun fact: Minhyuk was voted most gullible all four years in his high school.
"I see space unicorns again." Jihoon mumbled to himself abruptly, and all his bandmates whipped around to stare at him. Jihoon was known for saying things out of the left field, but this comment took the cake. Sometimes Jiho really wondered if Jihoon was dropped when he was a baby, because that was the only thing that explained the crazy.
"Fear not, my crazed companions, Park Kyung himself now has the map and shall lead us travelers straight to safety." Kyung yelled, grabbing the map out of Jiho's hands and running ahead. Jiho shot a look of disapproval and thought about tackling Kyung for a good long while, but eventually thought that abusing the evil maknae line member was a bad idea.
"Hey, we're out of the cornfields!" Taeil yelled happily, prancing through the grass that seemed oddly familiar. All of his fellow bandmates hooted and hollered, jumping up and down in unison.
"Wait... Isn't that our RV? You mean we walked in a huge circle?!" Jaehyo yelled, particularly angry at Jiho for not being good at directions. Jiho shrunk back, stuttering and muttering.
"Nope. Nope. Let's just get back in the RV." Minhyuk said unhappily. All of his bandmates agreed, frowning as solemnly as possible and marched back to the RV.
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Authors note
Ok, that was a short chapter, and I'm sorry. I just have been busy, tired and have had some pretty bad writer's block. But summer is here, which means I'm going to be updating on Sunday nights/Monday mornings instead of Saturday nights/Sunday mornings. What I've been busy with is the Justkiddingfilms Summer Writing Competition, which you should totally enter.
It hasn't gotten really hot here yet! It's only been in the low-mid nineties (farenheit)/ 33 or so degrees celcius. It's going to get hot sooner though, ugh. My question of the week for y'all is, how hot does it get for y'all in the summer? Is it nice (like in the nineties?), or ridiculously hot?
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