Chapter in "Can You Smile" 

The morning came as fast and yet as slow as it usually did, coloring the, as it seemed, just moment’s ago trees from the deep blue of the night to the golden orange of the morning. The sun shone right at the window where Jiu was still sitting, slowly turning and illuminating his guest as well.

The later was still asleep – curled up in the same way as before, holding on to the pillow. He probably hadn’t had a peaceful night sleep for weeks, not to many any other advantage any person should have – a chance to wash up and clean clothes. The stench coming from the place he was sleeping proved the lack of the last two. He probably felt disgusted with himself and how he looked; at least Jiu felt when he was in his place.

The look, the odor, the dirt covering one in layers as if scared people away. They didn’t stop to help if one had fallen or was being attacked, if a bit of money appeared, no store served one as a customer and no one agreed to buy just a bit of food, even if the beggar was a small boy. The fact that all what people passed by day by day had layered on him made him as invisible as dirt on the ground, as unpleasant, as disgusting to deal with.

Jiu stood up from the windowsill and walked to the backpack that stood between his mattress and the nightstand. He took out a set of clothes he didn’t wear anymore, the spare towel he had and a spare toothbrush. Since the moment he had a chance to gain all these, as if seemed, simple things back he didn’t part with them even though his ‘job’ forced him to live in places like these. He placed the items on the mattress and headed to the roof.

The sun was bright, warming up the gravel covered space and making it perfect for the routine Jiu had to complete every day since the moment he stepped in Miyaji’s home. Since that very moment he had been built as a machine of destruction – he along with several other kids of the same age. Yet he always stood out, he always succeeded more – he had to, or else he would be kicked out again.

Jiu didn’t feel the gravel prickling his hands when he pressed them against it, moving from element to element in the routine he had been perfecting for years; he didn’t feel any form of pain. He had felt the pain of hunger, but that was the only time. That was told to be the key of his success in their ‘business’ – not feeling any pain, not feeling a thing.

He was nearing the end of the ritual that prepared him for a new day, currently standing on his hands, when quiet, careful steps walked toward him and stopped in front of him. He slowly opened his eyes and of course, it was no one else but his guest SungYeol standing in front of him, holding on to the items Jiu had gathered for him.

“I was just wondering…” SungYeol spoke rather quietly, insecurely, yet his eyes had that same weird admiration in them, the tint of fear lost completely, only now it had another tint in it – something as scolding hot as the sun hitting the roof.

Jiu stood up and spoke straight forwardly: “You stink.” He said and picked up his shirt from the ground, where it had laid throughout his ‘workout’. “You’ve been on streets too long. It was impossible to sleep with your stench in the room.” He added and pulled the shirt over his head, not missing out that SungYeol was staring at him as intensely as he did last-night, but now that burning emotion was present and that was rather odd, to say the least. “Down the hallway. First door to the right.” He added, ignoring other’s eyes on him and left SungYeol on the roof and alone in the house. He had a lot of things to do, a lot of rules to set to his subordinates now, when SungYeol stayed in the same house, where just few meters away the life that had Jiu in happened in full speed.

He returned back in late afternoon. His ‘partners’ had received their instructions on handing over the money and the guns Jiu had provided to Miyaji’s right hand – Joker, and to start the mission to capture the daughter of the mayor of the city. She was the last piece in Miyaji’s plan, and capturing her was the main goal now. A place for her on the second floor was already prepared and Jiu just checked it once more, when footsteps on the stairs made him cautious.

He walked to the said stairs and wasn’t even surprised, seeing SungYeol walking around. The clothes were rather huge on him, but definitely better than the rags he wore before. His hair was no longer a greasy mess, but freely fell on his shoulders. He looked better than when Jiu found him on the floor of his room, but not as human-like, as he probably could, as one meal cannot give back the body mass lost in months. Despite all that, he was dangerously close to entering the territory he, as for now, had nothing to do with.

“Didn’t I say to stay away from my business?” Jiu spoke, startling SungYeol. His already wide eyes went wider and he stared at Jiu for a moment, before replying.

“I…didn’t… I mean… How could I know?” the male before Jiu stammered and he had a point. Jiu had not specified what his business is and where SungYeol should not go. He kind of didn’t think of that, and that was odd. Never before had he forgot even the smallest detail that had any kind of significance, so why did he forget now?

“The second and the first floor are off limits. You can get out by taking other stairs.” Jiu clarified the only rule he made last night and already turned around to walk away, but as there was no answer from SungYeol, he stopped and turned around again, to face the said male. The later immediately stammered out ‘understand’ and already wanted to leave, yet almost lost his balance on the stairs, making Jiu to take one step forward, just in case other would fall. A loud roar coming from SungYeol’s stomach followed and explained the lack of balance.

“The kettle is behind the nightstand.” Jiu said, hoping that SungYeol will get the hind and returned to checking the safety of the room he had chosen for the girl, when she would arrive. He checked it 3 times more than usually, as the fact he had forgot to complete one single rule to everything easier for him and his guest had got him off track. It was the first time that ever happened and it had no logical explanation.

Could it be that the reflection of his past, taken the form of SungYeol, had played a game on him? Twisted his mind and manipulated him in to forgetting such logical thing?

Jiu shook his head and headed to the first floor, checking all entrances, windows, and exits checked all the gates and if his rather unintelligent helpers hadn’t left any clues that they had been here and that they will return. The mission they had was of utmost importance and one wrong move could have sent it to complete failure.

Jiu returned to the 4^th floor only when the welcoming dark of the night slowly wrapped its arms around the area once again. Two pigeons were in his hand, cleaned and ready to become dinner for him and his guest. He head straight to the roof and for his surprise found SungYeol sleeping on the gravel. His arms were crossed under his head, the baggy shirt riding high and revealing his near sunk-in stomach and clearly visible ribs. For how long exactly had he starved?

Jiu put the birds down, set a camp-fire at its usual place, found a skewer and put the said birds on the fire as soon as it was possible. He looked at the fire for a moment and then turned his gaze to the still sleeping guest of his. What kind of mean trick the gods of fate had done, to give Jiu’s past to SungYeol? Did he, perhaps, was a fruit of the same kind of crime Jiu was? Or maybe he was just unlucky?

Jiu turned back to the camp-fire, watching how the branches slowly turned into ashes. He didn’t move when the gravel rustled and SungYeol sat in the same spot he sat yesterday. They both stared at the fire until the birds were ready and as soon as that happened, the skewer was handed to SungYeol. Jiu had been eating well, he was strong and could go a day without food, but his guest was on verge of collapsing… even if he was just a reflection in a twisted mirror, he couldn’t let him fall in to pieces.

Jiu stood up and headed to the house, when SungYeol spoke and stopped him. He could have just walked, but his past self, impersonated in the rather lost Korean guy was stronger. “You’re too skinny.” Was Jiu’s reply to SungYeol almost offering him to share the meal. That was the truth and it had to be fixed.

SungYeol returned to the room not so long after, hunger probably making him to devour the birds just like the night before. He thanked Jiu for the meal and went to his place on the other side of the nightstand. Yet again, he wished a ‘goodnight’ and left Jiu once again thinking about what so good was about the night.

The darkness behind the glass-less window thickened to near pitch black and then slowly faded out to grey and navy, melting away in yellow light of the morning once again, yet SungYeol’s ‘goodnight’ was still in Jiu’s head, not letting him to close his eyes for a moment already second night in the row.