"Hyung, do you think if we had taken care of her in high school, she wouldn't have gotten this far today?"  Sungjong asked Myungsoo.  They were both walking along the sidewalk, to the hospital from the police station.  Morning was just starting to come up.  It had been a long night and guilt was riding along the edges of Sungjong's heart.

"No.  She was a bully then and, no matter what we did, she wouldn't have changed her bully ways.  This fate was already in the cards."  Myungsoo kept his hands in his jean pockets and his head down.  His feet kicked small stones that happened to be in his way.

"What I did to her then at the club, you know, doesn't make me like her, right?"

"No."  Myungsoo wasn't in the mood to divulge details.  "She wanted it.  You wanted it.  That is all.  If she couldn't recognize you then, it was her problem."

"But hyung, I knew who she was.  Even when she was with Dongwoo, I wanted to make her pay..."

"Jjong!  You didn't kill Yeol!  She did.  Her brother did.  Stop tormenting yourself!"

Tears rolled down Sungjong's face.  "I miss him, Hyung."

Myungsoo sighed.  "I do, too."

Lilia opened her eyes after Woohyun had finally left her room.  She felt uncomfortable with him.  He loved her, she knew that.  But she felt like she betrayed him with Sungyeol.  Or maybe her heart did.  She liked Sungyeol, or was it love?  She put her head in her hands and wept.  He was gone and she would never know her true feelings.  He left her.  She remembered their kiss.  They bickered a lot but she didn't realize that maybe those fights were just the seeds to their... What?

Woohyun... he made her weak.  His shining, happy face.  His voice when he spoke sent shivers down her spine.  That heavenly kiss at the taxi.

She reached behind her and grabbed her extra pillow, and held it in front of her.  She curled up into a ball and cried her heart out. 

Woohyun stood at the door and watched her cry.  Then quietly closed her door and finally left. 

Woohyun walked to the elevator, pressed the 'up' button, and waited. 

He frowned.  His heart twinged a bit.  Sungyeol was one of his best friends, but why did he feel like a thief in the night?  Like 'finder's keepers'. How was he supposed to face Lilia now.  Did she really have feelings for Sungyeol?  Did that idiot get himself killed for misreading her feelings?

He pressed the 'up' button again.  Then again.  And again.  And again.  Each time, each press became harder and harder until he finally punched the wall.  The elevator dinged but he didn't get on.  He leaned against the wall and slid down it.  Both hands in his hair as he raked his fingers through roughly.  Then with one hand he grabbed his chest and squeezed.  The pain wouldn't go away.  "Yeol... we're you wrong?"

Haneul got out of bed and quickly got dressed.  She had to get out of the hospital and away.  Just away.  She couldn't face Dongwoo, or the rest of his friends.  She especially couldn't face Lilia.  How could they forgive her if she couldn't forgive herself?  She was the person who created the situation that got Sungyeol killed... Sungyeol, I'm sorry.  Please forgive me.

She opened the door quietly and looked out.  She could only see the feet that were sprawled out, but as she opened the door wider, she quickly realized it was Dongwoo lying uncomfortably in the chair.  His neck was bent backwards, his head pillowed on the hard wall behind him, his arms crossed over his belly, his eyes closed.  She tip-toed out of her room, closing the door quietly without even a click of the door as it shut.  She then waved her hand over his face, but he didn't flinch.  The rise-and-fall of his chest indicated he had fallen asleep. 

She squatted next to his chair and tearily smiled.  She moved a wisp off hair of his battered and bruised brow and longingly looked at his face.  Even covered in black, purple, and some pink bruises, his face was still handsome.  His lips still perfect and sweet even though they were cut and swollen.  She stood up to lean in and kiss him, but thought otherwise.  Goodbye, Dongwoo.  I'm sorry you had to meet such bad luck as me.  Maybe sometime in our next life...

She smiled and wiped the tears falling down her face.  She stood up and started walking away, the sounds of her sniffles and restrained crying faded the farther she walked away.  She desperately hit the 'down' button and prayed the elevator would open quickly.  It did immediately and she walked in and beat the 'close' button until her thumb ached. 

She had to go see Lilia.  Even if they didn't see each other, she had to know if she was alright. 

The elevator dinged again, she stepped out, and started heading for the nurses station when she found Woohyun crying on the floor near the elevator.  His knees were to his chest, this arms crossed over them, and his head lying upon those.  She didn't want to be seen by anyone but she couldn't walk away from this sad form on the floor.  She walked quietly to him, knelt beside him and placed a hand on his head and genly pat it.

He looked up, his bruised eyes wet, his cracked lips swollen. 

"Doctor..."

"Just call me Haneul," she smiled.  "With everything we've been through, 'doctor' seem inappropriate."

"Why... ?"

She bit her lip, and looked away.

He looked at the way she was dressed, and realized immediately.

"Are you leaving?"

She shook her head yes.  She couldn't form the words.

"Are you going to say goodbye?"

She knodded again.

"It's not your fault, you know.  Nobody blames you.  Lilia said those things out of duress and anger.  Don't take those words she said seriously..."

"They were the truth."  Haneul swallowed her tears.  "I'm just bad luck.  If I hadn't come to your lives... Sungyeol would be alive... "

"That's not true..."

"Don't lie to yourself.  Think about it.  If I wasn't around, Dongwoo wouldn't be getting beat up, Sungyeol would be alive, the dance studio wouldn't be in chaos, the band would be complete..."

"And Dongwoo would still be an and I wouldn't have met Lilia..."

"But Sungyeol would still be alive..."

"We don't know that.  Yoojin and her brother could have found someone else and the situation might have still happened.  Yoojin's jealousy..."

"But still, it doesn't change the fact that it was because of me, no matter what..."

"Don't leave, Doc... Dongwoo loves you.  It's incredibly obvious and Lilia loves you.  She wouldn't do the things she does if it wasn't for you..."

"It's time for me to go.  Woohyun, take care of Lilia for me... She needs you."  She loves you, too. "And I'll take Wrinkles.  I owe Sungyeol..."

"No, I'll take care of her.  Wrinkles was my best friend's cat.  I'll take care of her.  She's all I have that is left of him..."

Haneul knodded and turned to walk away.

"Wait!"

Haneul who was already pressing the button on the elevator, turned her head.  Lilia was standing there, in her hospital gown, barefoot.  She heard their whole conversation.  Haneul's hand slowly lowered and her body stiffened.  She waited for yet another verbal blow from Lilia. 

Lilia stood there, her long hair, unkempt.  Her bruises were now at their peak, very dark and vivid.  Lilia held her side, the broken rib pained her every step she took.  Woohyun immediately went to her side, holding her for support, placing her arm around his neck, his other hand around her waist.  His body, her crutch.  He bore her weight.

"Is that all you are good for?  Running?"  Lilia tried to move forward, Woohyun instinctively pulled her closer and lifted her slightly as she hobbled along.  "Ah, when Dongwoo got stabbed.  You ran away, not physically, but you ran away from your memories.  Now you can't do that again, so you are going to run away from all of us... !"

"Lilia..." Woohyun said, concerned.

Lilia looked at him with annoyance and then said, "I'm not going to sugar coat this.  You run and hide every time it gets emotionally and physically tough.  That is why all this keeps happening to you.  You let it happen.  Take a stand in your life.  This will never end until you get your head straight!"  She pulled her arm off of Woohyun once they were close enough.  She grimaced slightly when the pain shot through her rib cage, but she kept her emotions in check.  "So you've been .  Countless women have and have gone on to normal lives.  You aborted a child.  How many people have aborted children after and have gone on with their life?"

Woohyun didn't know this bit of information and his face tensed and his eyes widened from shock.  "HOW MANY MORE PEOPLE WILL YOU KILL?  TWO WEREN'T ENOUGH?!"  Now he understood what Lilia had meant.  Then the look in Woohyun's eyes changed.  He never met a person who went through so many trials in their life.  And then her understood Lilia.  Ah!  Lilia, you are so smart.  You don't hate her at all.

"Lilia, I..."

"Shut up!"  Lilia screamed.  "Right now, apologize to everyone for your stupidity and finally stand up and be the person I know you are.  Damn, your pissing me off!"  Lilia started fanning herself, as if she was burning up. 

The tears from Haneul leaked from her eyes.  One drop at a time.  "Lilia..." she whined, "I have to go.  I need to go.  I need to figure out where to start over.  I don't know what to do... Dongwoo..." she sobbed.

Lilia patted her friend's back as Haneul came to her and held her close.  Woohyun stood back and waited.  And at that second, Woohyun had those same thoughts that he needed to figure out where to start over.  And he was jealous.  Where do he and Lilia go from here?

Dongwoo woke up with a start.  He looked around and saw the nurses down the hall doing their duties.  The tap-tap, click-click of their shoes when they walked by was the only sounds around him.  He stood up, popped and stretched his neck, since he had taken a nap in a weird position.  He then peeked into Haneul's room and saw that she wasn't lying in bed.  He went farther into the room, and saw a pile of clothes on the floor.  He rushed in, picked them up and realized it was her hospital gown and slippers.  He ran to the cabinet next to the bathroom and pulled them open with so much strength the doors slammed into the wall.  Her clothes were gone.

He ran out calling the nurses who responded that they hadn't seen her since she was put into the room.  He ran to the elevators hoping that she had gone down to the next floor to see Lilia...

"I have to go.  I have to leave and forget everything.  I need to remember the me before every bad thing happened to me."

"Where will you go?"

"I don't know.  Some place quiet, the country maybe."  Haneul shrugged her shoulders, she wiped her nose with the back of her hand.

"What about Dongwoo?"

The tears started again, but she still forced a smile.  "He has the guys and you, Lilia.  Once I'm gone, he'll forget me and move on."

"I don't think it'll be that easy."  Woohyun said.  "You never witnessed the change in Dongwoo once you came."  Woohyun raked his hair with his fingers and then put his hands on his hips.  "Do you really need to do this?  If you leave, I can't imagine the change in Dongwoo that will occur."

"Dongwoo knows."

"Knows what?"  Lilia asked.  Just as frustrated as Woohyun with Haneul's guilt trips.

"You heard it Lilia, the truth.  He knows I was and that I had to abort that s baby.  I'm a mother who killed her baby..."

"Oh my God, what bull is this?!  You are not a mother who killed her baby!  'THAT' was not supposed to be inside your body.  Only love from a true man should put that inside you.  You had every reason to rid yourself of that monster's baby..."  Lilia was on the verge of strangling her.

"Lilia," she said quietly, "you know I can't hurt another life.  Even if he put it there... it killed me to do it.  A part of me disappeared with that unborn child... It's something I should never be forgiven for."

Lilia had to remind herself to breathe in and out.  Then she remembered all those times that Haneul treated the kittens and puppies and the mothers of those kittens and puppies.  Haneul just wasn't a person to kill something when she could save it.  It was inbred into her.  So Lilia then understood that being wasn't the trauma that made her into what she is today but it was the day she had to give up a life in her body. 

Woohyun stood back and tried to understand Haneul.  And realized that the reason Dongwoo loved this woman was because she couldn't watch someone physically or emotionally get hurt.  She never gave up on Dongwoo who was dying on the inside.  Maybe she didn't realize what she was doing to Dongwoo, but he did.  And Sungyeol... was the straw that broke her will.  Another death she couldn't prevent and would haunt her for the rest of her life.  The girl needed a new seed on life.  She was dying on the inside and nobody saw it, she needed that someone to not give up on her. 

Haneul hugged Lilia and then walked to Woohyun and hugged him.  She wiped her tears again and forced another smile.  "When I'm ready, I'll come back.  I just need some air to live again..."

She turned around pressed the button, the elevator dinged and she walked inside and then waved goodbye to her friends.  The door closed and the elevator whirred as it took her down to the first level.

At that moment, the other elevator opened and Dongwoo stepped out.  Lilia and Woohyun shocked at the unexpected encounter and what fate was doing to the pair.

Haneul cried all the way down.  The elevator dinged and the door opened.  She took one step, another step, and then another.  She ran outside, not wanting to face Dongwoo.  But in the process, she missed Sungjong and Myungsoo by inches.  Passing them at the glass doors  with her hand over and tears streaming down her face.  They both stopped short, their heads cocked, and looked at her with confusion.

"Noona..." Sungjong began but his voice slowly faded out.

She ran to the road and caught the first taxi that stopped for her.  She jumped in and the car sped away.

"Hyung, should we have stopped her?"  Sungjong looked at Myungsoo who was just as flabbergasted.

"I don't think so.  She seemed like she needed to get out of here."  Myungsoo looked up and wondered what happened to make her want to leave so badly.  He then shrugged his shoulders, but something bothered him and he looked back where she had once been at the road.  He then put his hand on Sungjong's back, "Let's get inside."

"Hyung!"  Woohyun said, shocked.

"Did you see Haneul?"

Lilia and Woohyun looked at each other, with knowing.  Both uncertain if they should tell the truth or not.

"Um... she just left."  Lilia started. 

"Where did she go?"  Dongwoo looked around. 

"Hyung, I'm just going to tell you the truth."  Woohyun not feeling good about what he was about to do.  "She left... the hospital... and Seoul..."

"What?!"

Lilia cleared .  "Dongwoo, with all that has happened and you know her stubborn side, she has taken it upon herself to leave and to restart her life."

Dongwoo faultered a bit.  "You let her go..."  He said very low and on his breath.  Defeated.

Lilia hobbled over, with the help of Woohyun, and put her arm through Dongwoo's.  Then she gently patted it.  Then she sighed and closed her eyes.  "You know the truth.  You heard it.  I'm not Haneul and I don't know her mind but with Sungyeol's de..."  Lilia caught herself.  She could feel the tears forming and tighten, "with Sungyeol's de...ath, she feels like she has caused everyone too much pain.  Herself mostly.  Losing Sungyeol... was... very traumatic.  And after the truth of her was announced, I think she feels that she isn't worthy of anyone's friendship or love, especially yours..."  Lilia forced out.  The tears were on the brink.  She had to keep them in.

The elevator dinged again when Sungjong and Myungsoo walked out.  "Dongwoo-hyung, what did you say to Noona?"  Sungjong said as soon as he saw Dongwoo.  "She was running out of the hospital in tears..."

"You just saw her?!"

"Yeah." Sungjong responded.

Dongwoo turned immediately but Woohyun grabbed his arm.  "Let her go."

"I can't."  Dongwoo said, panic was imminent.

"Hyung..." Woohyun pleaded.

"Let me go." Dongwoo growled.  "We can't end it this way."

Dongwoo pushed Woohyun's hand off and beat the elevator button.  When the elevator didn't come fast enough, he took the emergency exit and took the stairs down, two at a time.

"What just happened?"  Sungjong asked again.

"It's obvious.  She left Dongwoo-hyung."  Myungsoo stated, his hands in his pants pockets.  "She blames herself for this whole mess."  Myungsoo had hit the nail on the head.  Just by the powers of observation, he knew the whole story without being there.  The sad expressions on Lilia's and Woohyun's faces and the worry on Dongwoo's.  He figured out the problem immediately.

"Oh," was all that Sungjong could say.

Haneul gave the driver his fare and alighted the taxi.  Feeling a bit trepidus, she slowly walked into the police station.  Not sure why she was there but she knew she had to be there.  Coming to a desk, she asked if she could visit a prisoner and then was escorted to a room.  A large, thick, glass-plated wall separated her from the other room.

A bell sounded, then the door in the other room opened.  The prisoner walked in hand-cuffed in the front, dressed in a green worn jumper with white EA25841 stitched over the left side of the chest.  The person sat down but never looked up.

They both sat in silence.  The minutes ticked by when finally the prisoner couldn't take it anymore.

"I'm... sorry."

Haneul looked up and saw that the person seemed a bit sincere but she wasn't sure. 

"There's nothing I can say to make things right.  But I can say 'I'm sorry.'  I don't expect you to forgive me.  Just..." She started crying.  "I didn't know my brother was the one..." She sobbed some more.  "I wanted... Dongwoo..." She wiped her eyes and then the snot running from her nose.  "I know I ed up..."

Haneul kept quiet as the girl kept apologizing.

"Is Dongwoo... o-okay?"

Haneul just stared at her for moments then replied, "No.  His friend was killed and he found out that I was a killer.  How do you think he feels?"  She spited back at Yoojin.  Seeing her there, the anger resurfaced and it started to spill.  "I did nothing to you.  I did nothing to your brother.  What did I get for it?  I lost my ity.  I lost something precious I can't ever get back.  I lost a friend.  And, most of all, I lost myself."  She paused and finished, "I want it all back!"

Yoojin had never seen Haneul this way.  She'd always been placid and quiet.  "I kn-know y-you can't forgive me.  I kn-know.  I should d-die... Your friend said that I need to apolog..."

Haneul stood up at that.  "No!  You should feel what a person should feel.  You should love the people you should love.  You should suffer for any misdeed you have done.  To die... is too easy.  I want you to live, love and suffer... and come out of this hell hole a better person."

"O-okay."

"Don't ever come and find me.  Don't look for me.  I'll hope and pray that as time goes on that you have made peace with yourself..."  Haneul abruptly turned.  She took a long breath, as if she had been holding it, and then walked out leaving Yoojin uncertain of what to do.

As Haneul walked out, she felt a tiny bit better.  She said what she had to say.  And that one-tenth of her heart was now appeased for the time.  She held her head high and caught another taxi, it was now time for her to start her new life...