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Take My Breath Away
Chapter Thirty-Six
"Excuse you?"
9th of March 2015
“Man, took you long enough! I’m starving!”
Despite the warmth that tried to express through his words, his facial expressions, those pair of crystal eyes, his lips that curved up into a wide smile; fake, fake, fake—was all she could think as she sat down in front of him. With a deep exhale, she put her bag to her side and stared at him, seeing how he pursued his lips as his forefinger trailed all around the menu, asking her if she wanted chicken chop or fish and chips or possibly even just garlic bread with a nice bowl of soup but she couldn’t exactly care less at this moment. Her eyes stared at the skin below the curve of his eyes, a little puffed up but not too swollen to attract the obvious. His mouth still mumbling something like but their mushroom soup here and also but you like mushroom soup and maybe even maybe we could share a bowl—all irrelevant to her ears.
“So what would you like?” The question slipped past, his head tilted up to meet gazes with her finally and she hasn’t fazed since she sat down. The long red book in front of her, menu written in gold but still stationary because she hasn’t even took the initiative to flip it open.
Yet, he straightened his back, his hand reaching over to place it over hers—has his hand always felt this warm?
“If you keep staring at me like that, I’ll make you wear a paper bag,” He nodded once to emphasize his point, a simple one syllable word that made her heart… “Stop.”
She tried to at least give him a smile but a part of her felt like it would be wrong to do so. How could she smile at someone she broke badly? How could she possibly give him a smile when all she knows that’s not what he can do? She was having a battle in her mind, a debate that was going terribly wrong but she managed to let her lips inch up, a bit but it still looked beautiful nevertheless to him. “How about you order, then?”
His lips spread out into a smile, one that easily showed that he was fine, one that people could easily be deceived for being happy when in reality, he wasn’t feeling that at all. He held up the menu and gave a slight closing of one eye, a wink, he supposed before he called the waiter, “I’m not holding back, then.”
The meal was pleasant, tasty food and the seasoning was just about right when it arrived at the perfect temperature. Probably there’s a damage in her purse but it’s nothing compared to the damage she’s done. Though it wasn’t as silent as she pictured it to be—because she really did imagine this dinner to be dead quiet, no one speaking apart from the people around them chattering, whispering and echoing into their ears but…no. All she could hear was Minseok’s voice talking to her, speaking to her steadily in a stable voice as if he was never broken in the first place. He didn’t even mention anything relating about the incident a moment ago.
It’s as if it never happened…
So when the two were settled down by the park, underneath a very familiar tree with the cold night enveloping the two, it felt like she was in for a lost ride. She didn’t know what to expect, what to say, what to do—this was indeed a first.
However, in the crisp of the night, the stars appeared before their eyes, glittering and enlightening the dark blue painted above their heads. A smooth wave of wind gushed upon them gently—subtle but strong enough for them to feel the icy feeling stinging on their skin. He leaned his back against the wood behind his back, a solid trunk maintaining his weight and it was enough for her to do the same as well.
There was just this moment of not speaking, not saying anything that made it so melodramatic; she didn’t know if she likes it but she wasn’t too sure if she disliked it as well.
Then, he spoke.
You don’t have to feel guilty, Hee Young-ah…
And as if she lost her ability to speak, her wit to form a sentence, all she did was stare at him with questioning eyes. He returned her eyes with a smile, one that actually managed to make her heart ache just by flashing a smile.
“Love… happens when there’s a mutual feeling between one another,” His voice shaky, slightly fragile but certain with what he truly wants, ”But sometimes… it fails, going on a one way turn and only one feels that way,” He looked away from her, his hand slowly yet definitely reaching for hers and she allowed that, she welcomed him to hold onto his hand that got cold all of a sudden. He laced their fingers together, feeling good that he could finally do this without feeling bad, without feeling forced to do so—because it was the last time.
“I can’t force you to love me, and I’m grateful you didn’t force yourself either,” He breathed out in the end, finding himself braver to speak his mind, he gave his all in explaining because he’d never want to explain this again—he couldn’t bear to. But he had to make sure that she doesn’t feel guilty for something she shouldn’t because it’s not her fault.
“I want someone to love me just like that. Whether if it’s slowly or all at once, I want her to do it all on her own will—to love me like she does,” He admitted confidently, finding himself pleased with his answer as if he’d get a prize for saying that; he really did want just that. Yet, he found himself using his other hand to rub the back of his neck, beginning to feel nervous all of a sudden from that confession, “Ah… I’m talking too much, aren’t I?”
She shook her head, her hand giving him a supportive squeeze, her voice slipping into his mind, echoing to the deepest parts and shaking his gentle heart, “I think… someone is going to do more than that for a guy like you.”
He had another curve on his lips, eyes glancing at her with the corners, “You really think so?”
And she could only offer a sincere smile, “I know so.”
It was just another pause in life where they two stared at the things happening around them; overlooked by many, noticed by some, appreciated by a few. These two were exactly the few. The lights from buildings that and turned off simultaneously, the minor honking of cars since it was deep into the night, small hoots from owls hanging on the trees; everything.
“Can you lean your head against my shoulder once more?” His voice was laced with this tender temperament, coaxing her to do so without even missing a beat, “You don’t need to ask, Minseok-ah…”
He began to feel comfortable; he felt as if… it wasn’t impossible to be just friends with the person you fell in love with. It wasn’t impossible to get back on track, it wasn’t impossible to feel this type of a way and to feel broken but in the end, feel alright once more. It was hard, and he knew it was going to be a struggle but as long as he had her, as long as he had himself to fight for it, as long as he was determined to make a change—nothing was impossible.
“How about a hug?”
Not even a second she waited, “Anytime.”
He felt himself growing cheekier, “A kiss?”
She didn’t wait again, “Little .”
Standing by her locker, she popped it open and groaned upon seeing the mess that happened in there. It’s like a tornado had found a way in and messed everything up but it’s not exactly how she messed it up but she didn’t remember leaving it nicely either. So to start of her morning, she ended up arranging her books in it, nearly letting a book fall from her hands and definitely, it would fall to the floor with a thud but instead, she was greeted with a smile, a hand returning the book back to her, “You dropped this.”
She knew that voice very well and… well…
“T-Thanks, Min.”
He shrugged it off as a you’re welcome as his back pressed against the lockers, his hand held out as a temporary stand for her to place the books on it before she slowly arranged one by one—because there’s no saying when’s the next time she would be putting her books in a neat and proper order. And Minseok didn’t allow the situation to be awkward, no, he didn’t. Instead, he started asking questions that he had on top of his list and as he said it out loud, he crossed it off his checklist.
Well, a short term checklist…
“Did you hear about the MT they’re planning?” Minseok asked, since the two were in the same homeroom class and it was basically mandatory for everyone to go but even with that, some people don’t give a care because they’re not interested—Hee Young being one of them. “Yeah… I think I did.”
His cheeks seemed to color, his hand moving back into his pocket once she was done with stuffing all her books in a nice order, closing the locker door after as he said, “Are you going?”
It was already obvious, so she shook her head with her hand tugging onto her bag pack strap, “No,”
He nodded, poking her forehead, “You should.”
“Why?”
He wiggled his eyebrows, as if, as if everything was back to normal. “Because I’m going.”
“And why would I-?”
“C’mon… first you break my heart and now you’re breaking your promise?” Minseok knew it was wrong to use this against her—but he had to, he wanted to, he needed to have no regrets. He saw how her lips pressed together in a thin line as he shoved her into the corner of guilt, not giving her a chance to pull away from the infamous puppy eyes he was giving her, tugging onto her heartstrings and since when has he became this manipulative? It was a clear win, a solid bagging in of a gold when she checked her watch, signaling that she was already late and she had to go as of now but she couldn’t leave until she gave him an answer.
“…just sign up for me, alright?”
He had that signature smile on his face, the one that had her feeling bad for breaking but… it was there on his face.
“You got it.”
She knew she was late because she took longer than expected to reach the doors of where she’d need to go through but heck, it was better than not showing up to class at all. She knocked once, twice, until she heard the voice on the other end that granted her permission to enter the room without getting hit with a thrown shoe.
“Ah, Miss Kwan, you’re finally in class,” A sarcastic voice spoke from the middle of the room, causing her to roll her eyes as she stepped in, making a mental note to slap Mr. Kang later as she settled down on the floor. “Nevertheless, take a seat, take a seat. Today we’ll be having a simple exercise and it’s about trust; because all of you have more than just a little trouble in having trust in one another…”
He went on rambling about how trust is important, how trust is needed in dancing and how you really need trust if you performed any tricks that included throwing your partner up into the air because that’s when you really need the trust as if your life depended on it because a serious injury could occur if you don’t trust one another.
So in the midst of his little speech of explaining how trust is everything to dancers, to partners, a voice seemed to have interrupted her concentration.
Funny, she wasn’t actually paying attention.
“Where were you, yesterday?”
She didn’t bother to sneak a glance because why would she need to when she knows she’ll be right?
“I was busy,” She mumbled softly, pretty sure that she doesn’t need to answer him but hey, he asked nicely. Nicely, not even close but she’ll let it slide. After what happened last night, yesterday, it’s like her brain was fried—not in a good way. “Doing what?” He replied coolly, his arm nearly touching hers because of how close the two suddenly got together.
“None of your business—“
“I’m sure if you two keep yapping your way through this class, you’ll certainly get something out of this lesson.” A voice suddenly spoke from across the room and it was not Mr. Kang’s voice; it was a female’s. Looking ahead, Hee Young easily spotted who had said that and it wasn’t that hard to put two and two together. Well, well, well… look who finally snapped.
“Is there something you’d like to add on, Soon Hae?” Mr. Kang interrupted, turning to look at Soon Hae in a way that was able to make her feel like she shouldn’t have said that and she might want to bite her own head off.
“N-No, it’s just that… They two were—“
“And what is this, primary school? If they want to talk and completely ignore my lesson,” Mr. Kang turned to give the two a look, one that definitely made them want to crawl into a hole and never come out from, “That’s their problem.”
“Way to ing go,” Hee Young hissed, shoving Kai away by the arm. He nearly laughed but based on the venomous glare pasted on Mr. Kang’s face—his laughter can hold…at least, until class was over.
“You nearly tripped me!” Kai exclaimed, ripping the blindfold off from his eyes, returning his vision back and the first thing he did was shoot daggers at…
“Well, blame you for having two left feet,” Hee Young cooed softly, reaching for her bag easily without giving much care about Kai nearly falling flat square on his face. Maybe it was intentional, maybe it wasn’t—but there isn’t much proof considering Kai was the one being blindfolded and Hee Young was the one who had to lead Kai through a few dances without falling, tripping or breaking a bone—it didn’t matter if it was his bone or hers, the rules were clear.
“Aye, it was your fault!” The boy claimed, poking her arm a little too many times before finally breaking her when she turned around to give him a nudge on the shoulders, “Why don’t you go complain to someone who would love to listen?” Her eyes somewhat gave him a hint when she looked over his shoulder and it didn’t take much for him to follow her gaze, tilting his head over to see that someone was staring from across the room, as if staring could send what she was thinking into their minds.
“Ah… she’s just—“ He stopped midway, turning around to grin at Hee Young, “Are you jealous?”
She nearly choked on her own saliva and she hacked it off with a few coughs before blinking up to him, “Even if you two got married, I still won’t give a ,”
His eyes widened and definitely, there was a flare of anger, “Yah! You can’t just-!”
“Kai, Hee Young, c’mere,” A person called and just by the voice, the dumb and dumber had guessed it was their teacher speaking. Hee Young gave him a smirk, one that came across as satisfaction and somewhat, victorious, “Guess what? I can.”
A few steps after and one or two snarky comments later...
“What is it now?” Kai asked, standing in front of Mr. Kang’s table with hands in his pockets. Mr. Kang simply got up and flicked the boy on the forehead, making the latter hiss before rubbing his skin, “W-What was that for?!”
Before he explained, Hee Young, too, received—“Dude, what the ?”
“That’s for flirting in my class.”
The two gave looks to one another, wide eyed and entirely baffled, “Flirting?!”
“With him?”
“Her? I could do better than that.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Hey,” Mr. Kang laughed, placing his hands on both of their heads to make them face him, “Two of you, zip it. I need your help,”
Hee Young gently shoved his hand away from her head, raking her hand through her hair to straighten the strands, “That’s not how you ask for help.”
Kai jabbed his thumb at her direction, “Crazy chick has a point.”
Hee Young didn’t particularly mind that ‘title’ because, well, let’s just say she’s heard worse than that. She nodded and returned the favor, “Doofus agrees,”
“Alright, who the are you—“
“I need you two to help me stock up the supplies in the storeroom.”
And by that, he definitely means all the ballet shoes, ballet clothing for the upcoming performance at the end of the year, all the props, the amount of paint they’d need to paint all the stage items—in general, everything that you’d need for a major play? That’s the amount of supplies he had ordered and the truck had just arrived, bringing and loaded with all the things that were useful yet compulsory in preparing one hell of a performance, play, whatever you call it.
“Excuse you?” Hee Young’s head bobbed forward, blinking at Mr. Kang as if he had just said something really ridiculous.
“Yeah, and I’ve decided that you two are the ones that are going to help me. Unless, you’d rather let an old person like me—“
“There he goes again,”
“This , really?”
Mr. Kang laughed at the simultaneous objections, but he couldn’t help it, it was his only way. “C’mon, if you do this for me, I’ll give you a few days off your classes. Don’t they have that MT coming up? I’ll guarantee a spot for the both of you.
Hee Young nearly grinned too soon, because she didn’t need it. She easily waved a hand, “Then I don’t need it.” Before she could walk away, Kai gripped onto the latch of her bag, halting her, “You’re going?”
“That’s none of your business.” Hee Young slapped his hand away, turning around to see that maybe he was interested in going. Then again, that was also none of her business. So when she proceeded to walk out of the class without deciding to help or whatsoever, Mr. Kang was left staring at Kai with a hopeful grin. All Kai could do was groan, let out a few cuss words before he cracked his knuckles, “Alright, where’s the freaking truck?”
“So, how long have you two been together?” Mr. Kang asked, reaching for another box of feathers—because really, they needed feathers—to place it onto Kai’s arms before he reached for another, and another, and another. Kai nearly felt himself losing it because of the sentence, his eyes suddenly so wide as he blinked at Mr. Kang, “Two, who?”
“Don’t play dumb,” Mr. Kang snorted, placing another box on top of the one Kai had before reaching in for another with a grunt, “You and Hee Young, of course,”
“W-We’re not exactly—“
“I heard my name,” A voice spoke, appearing all of a sudden as she extended her arms out, allowing Mr. Kang to place the box of paint this time onto her arms instead of Kai’s. The boy took a double take at her, wondering how the hell she got here so quick and why the hell is she here as he blinked at her, now staring. Mr. Kang shook his head with a laugh, placing another box of fabric onto her box of paint before motioning the two, “Go place it in the store first, then come back for more,”
“What makes you think we’ll come back?” Kai asked, more like, challenging as his eyes nearly dug into Mr. Kang’s soul because he couldn’t stop at four boxes of feather.
“Oh, I just know you will,” Mr. Kang smiled, making it too cringe worthy that the two simply turned their backs on him, hurriedly walking off to where the storeroom was because one, they didn’t want to look any longer and two, this isn’t exactly light to begin with.
As the two walked together, side by side, step after step, he couldn’t help but just ask, “What made you change your mind?”
She shrugged, glancing at him with the corner of her eyes, “I just thought you’d need help.”
“I didn’t say I need—“
“A simple thank you would be fine,” She cut him off, nearly deadpanning her words into his face that he couldn’t help himself but just stop for a second to actually think. He proceeded to just keep quiet, making a left turn and then a right and then a left again before the two would reach the stairs to walk up to the designated place to drop everything they were carrying.
In the midst of placing all the boxes down, stacking them onto the shelves nicely, a soft thank you could be heard as she reached up to place the box of feathers onto the highest shelf. It was stuffy in here, hot and warm and it did not smell pleasant with all the heated up rubber mats placed at the end of the room. Yeah, this place smelled like someone died in here, it was horrible.
“What?” She breathed out softly, feeling that if she inhaled anymore air from here, her lungs would be filled with dust as she looked over her shoulder, seeing him on the other side of the room as he had taken the liberty in stacking the paint on the other shelf.
He could either pretend he didn’t say anything or just repeat it once more. Of course, he chose the first option, shrugging it off as if he hadn’t open his mouth, as if it didn’t take a bite out of his guts to just say two simple words to appreciate what she was doing.
However, she wasn’t dumb—though, if compared to him the two could be the dumb and dumber, all she did was say, “I’ll head back out first,” Before deciding to walk past him, towards the exit of the room since she was done with stacking up the box of feathers onto the shelves. He gave a short okay before heading back to stack the box of fabric in the cupboards and screw Mr. Kang for labelling ‘open box and arrange according to color’ on top.
In the middle of his grumbling because he has no idea which was which color, he heard his name being called out from the door and he looked up, surprised that she hadn’t—
“You’re welcome.”
Author's note; I may not be able to update all the time now
(not that I am)because of things that got in the way but I'll try to write whenever I can, however I can, I'll try. It'll be slow, and the updates will not come in every week but not too slow, I hope.
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