HONESTY ft. Kim Minseok

 

“Today is the day of redemption, Minseok.”

 

Kim Minseok got out of bed earlier than usual and did his morning rituals. Today was the day he’s been practicing for almost a month now. He is currently a trainee at a Korean entertainment, and aces in singing. Being a trainee for more than a year, he expects himself to improve in all aspects, but he just couldn’t dance. Today is the evaluation for dancing.

 

After eating his breakfast, Minseok rushed back to his room and played the evaluation song on repeat. On the third repeat on feeling the beat, Minseok finally stood up and started dancing the routine. Every now and then, he would stop the music and practice certain movements he thought were not so good in transitions and execution.

 

He took all the comments to heart and felt it was for his own good anyway. He got hurt with the comments of their trainers, of course, but he’ll always get back up and do better next time. It was better for him if they were all too honest with him rather than to sugar-coat words.

 

A beeping from his mobile phone got him to go off-track from his practice. He tried to catch up with the choreography, but his concentration already broke.

 

He stopped the music and got his mobile phone.

 

TRAINEE Lu Han: Happy one month, Minseokkie :) are you ready for today?

 

Minseok: Ah, neh. I’m getting ready now.

 

Minseok took a few seconds before sending the message to Luhan. Ever since he found out about Luhan’s secret affair, his feelings towards him lessened as he felt guilty for intruding in their relationship. He always wanted to tell Luhan about it but he never got the chance to. Since it was evaluation that day, he decided to take that opportunity to tell him while they weren’t busy with training.

 

TRAINEE Lu Han: Great~ ^o^ see you later.

 

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Minseok walked the entire trip to the entertainment building while having the evaluation song on loop in his mp3 player.

 

“Good morning,” Minseok bowed at the staff members who were at the door, then rushed to the dance studio before evaluation starts so that he could practice beforehand. When he arrived at the studio, there were only four other trainees there aside from him.

 

“Minseok sunbaenim,” The four trainees bowed as their senior trainee walked in the room.

 

He was a respected trainee because he was nice and innocent. He was the type of person who stayed away from and didn’t believe in gossip the trainees spread.

 

While the five of them were practicing, the number of trainees in the room increased. Today, the girl trainees were watching the guys during evaluation, which added more pressure on Minseok. It was the first time they let the girl trainees watch the guys.

 

“Okay trainees, it’s time for your monthly evaluation,” the stern woman stepped in the room and sat on one of the sides so that she could see all the trainees.

 

“Ah,” Minseok thought as he saw one of the entertainment heads look at them. From his knowledge, she was in charge of all the talents and determines if a trainee is ready or not. “They might be looking for possible members for a new boy band.”

 

The male trainees formed their three groups of six. They’ve been practicing the routine for a month, and now, finally they’re being put to the test. They all had to learn the same set of choreography taught using Bruno Mars’ “Treasure”.

 

Minseok’s group was the first one to go. Everything went smoothly, just as what Minseok practiced.

 

“First group,” the stern lady said. “What happened? That performance lacked energy. Your trainer told me that your rehearsal was much better.”

 

Minseok accepted it. He did his best, but apparently, it wasn’t good enough.

 

“Kim Minseok.” He waited patiently for the lady to talk about his performance, like how she did with the rest of s.

 

“Your performance brought the group down.”

 

Minseok was completely caught off-guard with what he said. He felt hurt, but as always, he tried to hide it inside.

 

“Your dancing didn’t improve from the last time. It was the same Minseok I saw from the video of last month’s evaluation.”

 

Minseok nodded.

 

After everyone in his group was commented on, it was Luhan’s group next. As usual, Luhan did really well. He was a dancer, anyway. Minseok was really happy for his ‘boyfriend’ since he’s been consistently good in every evaluation, even in singing. Minseok saw his potential and truthfully told Luhan that he will be the one debuting and not himself.

 

After dance evaluations, everyone started leaving the room, but then Minseok was called over by the talent head. They waited for all of the trainees to head out the room before speaking.

 

“We don’t really know what to do with you Minseok… We’re sorry but your dancing hasn’t improved.”

 

“I can try harder.”

 

“Until when will you use that as a reason? You know, your dance trainer here told me if you still didn’t do well today, we’d have to consider dropping you from the roster of trainees.”

 

“It’s okay, seonsaengnim,” Minseok smiled and bowed. “It’s been a pleasure being your trainee for more than a year. It’s been a gruelling experience—a fun one… but I don’t think this is me, seeing my progress.”

 

“I like your honesty, Minseok. Not even considering coming back?”

 

Minseok shook his head and smiled sincerely.

 

“Your voice… that talent—”

 

“I’ll probably think about it when I finally get better in dancing.”

 

“Goodbye now, Minseok. You may pack up your things now.”

 

“Neh, seonsaengnim,” Minseok bowed. “Goodbye and thank you so much.”

 

“Minseok?”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“Happy holidays, and we hope you return.”

 

Minseok chuckled and finally replied before he went out. “I’ll think about it.”

 

“What happened in there?” Luhan asked as soon as Minseok got out of the room.

 

“Oh you know, I didn’t do well… again…” Minseok replied like he didn’t care. “It’s like whatever I do isn’t even good anymore.”

 

“I meant, why did they make you stay?”

 

Minseok stuttered. “I-it’s nothing. Just practice, they said.”

 

Luhan just looked at Minseok with concern. “Are you okay?”

 

“Yes, I—”

 

Luhan then pulled Minseok to a blind corner so that no one could see them.

 

“Y-yah—”

 

Luhan kissed Minseok deeply. Minseok was a little uncomfortable but started kissing back right after.

 

“Happy one month,” Luhan said softly as he pulled away.

 

“H-happy one month… Lu ge?”

 

“Minseok.”

 

“I need to talk to you.”

 

Luhan’s eyebrows met. “What’s up?”

 

“I’ll tell you later. I got to go first,” Minseok stormed off as Luhan just let him leave.

 

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“To Minseok!” One of the senior trainees said as he raised a slice of beef in the air with his chopsticks. They couldn’t drink soju that early.

 

“To Minseok!” Everyone else on the table shouted as they started munching on the beef.

 

Minseok laughed as they celebrated. For Minseok, it wasn’t goodbye, but a new beginning. He will just be true to himself and be honest with his life choices.

 

That includes telling Luhan that he doesn’t want to get together anymore.

 

Unfortunately, the senior trainees had to wrap their lunch because they had to head back and train. Minseok was left walking alone to the trainees’ dorms, where he told Luhan to meet him after their training. While waiting for Luhan, Minseok tried to plan out what he was going to say as to not hurt Luhan too much.

 

“You were cheating,” He thought.

 

At first the thought that it would be too direct… but he didn’t want to sugar-coat the truth. If he wants to make his point clear, he has to be really blunt about it.

 

The clock’s ticking got louder as the seconds passed. He was alone in that dorm. The very place he stayed in during his whole duration of his training. The surroundings got dim at each second. The silence was enveloping as he reminisced on all his memories as a trainee. Finally, Luhan texted him that he’s on his way.

 

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“Hey Minseokkie, what’s up?” Luhan decided to break the dead silence that befell upon them while they were walking back to Luhan’s house.

 

Luhan looked confused by Minseok’s sudden change in attitude. “Seok ge?”

 

“I…” Minseok gulped. “I’m not a trainee anymore.”

 

Luhan gasped as his expression widened. “B-but—”

 

“Yeah, that’s why they made me stay a while ago.”

 

“What did they say?”

 

Minseok told Luhan everything. What the woman said earlier, and how he felt. How everything didn’t work out, and how he just felt he wasn’t cut out for it.

 

The air outside was chilly. Luhan looked like he was still in a state of shock with what Minseok shared with him until they finally reached the front of Luhan’s house.

 

“I tried my best, Luhan, I’m sorry,” Minseok said as he hugged Luhan.

 

Luhan did nothing else but to return his hug.

 

“But this isn’t the only thing I want to tell you,” Minseok pulled away and looked at Luhan straight in the eyes.

 

“Wh-what… is it then?”

 

“I know about your relationship.”

 

Luhan’s eyes and mouth were just left open in his surprise. Minseok had to say it now, before it was too late.

 

“I saw you texting him days ago… I didn’t know how to… say it exactly… I thought you would tell me.”

 

Luhan cupped Minseok’s face. “It’s okay. I’m sorry. I’m really sorry for all the things I have done and I’ve been untruthful. I shouldn’t have engaged in this I’m—”

 

“Shh…” Minseok said as he smiled and tried to comfort a crying Luhan in front of him.

 

Luhan pulled him closer and planted a kiss on his lips. Minseok was caught by surprise, but saw this as a way to make Luhan calm down.

 

As they pulled away in the kiss, Minseok saw something that ruined his whole plan. He didn’t know Luhan’s boyfriend, but he had a strong feeling that that young boy at the distance was actually him.