She woke up with a different surrounding. She can still feel her head pounding, her whole body shaking and her heart beating fast as if it could explode any minute. Word per word, Mrs. Jung's voice echoed inside her head. 

YOU ! YOU'RE A ! YOU DESTROYED MY DAUGHTER'S RELATIONSHIP WITH JIYONG! NOW MY DAUGHTER'S IN THE HOSPITAL! SHE TRIED TO HURT HERSELF!! YOU'RE A !

Slowly, she feels like she's losing herself. 

Stop! Please stop!

She covered her ears with her hands. I'm sorry! It's my fault! Jeongmal Mianhaeyo. Tears won't stop cascading down her cheeks, she can't breathe, as if something's pounding her chest. It felt heavy and it hurts. I wan't this to end. I don't want this anymore. She looked around the room, searching for something. She blindly made her way to the bathroom amidst the darkness, she the light and locked the door. By opening the medicine cabinet she saw a blade, with shaking hands she reached for it

Mianhae. Jeongmal Mianhaeyo. I deserve this. I deserve to die. 

=========================================================================================

Jiyong woke up feeling better, but he's still worried, how will Dara take all of this? It's his fault. He should've protected her but what did he do? He even hurt her by lying with Nana. He just wanted to see if she's feeling something for him. It doesn't matter if it's not love, as long as she's feeling something for him, that's all that matters. He should talk to her seriously, and now is the right time right? He'll tell her everything, he'll forget every bad thing that happened and start anew with her. They'll move on with all of this bull. They will. 

He decided to cook dinner first, thinking that she haven't eaten yet since this morning. That stubborn lady needs to listen to him from now on. He was carrying a tray of foods as he tiptoed his way from where she's sleeping, the darkness and the quietness of the room creeped him out. He shouldn't have left the lights off, what if she's afraid of the dark? Aish! Pabo Kwon Jiyong! 

He placed the tray at the table beside the sofa and switched on the light. His heart pounded when he saw the bed empty, he can hear his own heart pounding hard as he look at the surrounding, until his gaze went to the closed bathroom door, he rushed towards it and knocked softly

"Dee? Are you done?" 

But she didn't answer him. 

"Dee?? Open the door baby"

Andwae! What are you thinking Kwon Jiyong! 

"DARA! OPEN THE DOOR NOW!" 

He knocked hard, his hands shaking, his feet cold, bullets of sweat forming on his forehead. That's impossible. Solma. 

"DARA I SWEAR I'LL DESTROY THIS DOOR IF YOU DON'T ANSWER ME!"

IT. 

He kicked the door hard, destroying the lock. The lights were on. Yet he's too afraid to look. 

Andwae. 

It was like his soul left him right this instant. 

Andwae. Andwae. It's impossible. Andwae

"Dee" he whispered, "DEE!" He rushed into her, her eyes closed, her skin is pale and her wrist is bleeding badly. "! SANDARA PARK! OPEN YOUR EYES!" 

He was tapping her cheeks "OPEN YOUR EYES GODDAMNIT!!" He doesn't know what to do anymore. He's ing shaking and his mind went blank. She won't respond. She's not moving either. He felt her pulse, her heart beat slow. DEE!!

With all his remaining strength he lifted her up and rushed out of his house. He placed her at the backseat, and hurriedly sped off the house. His heart still pounding hard

"Hold on Dee okay? I swear if you leave me I'll follow you! I swear!" 

He drove like a madman, not stopping when the traffic light turned red. He doesn't care anymore.

=====================================================================================================

"Why isn't she waking up yet?" He whispered as he stares at her for hours now. He was sitting beside her hospital bed, holding her hands since yesterday night,too scared to leave her even for a second, too afraid of what might happen when he leave her again. 

"Hyung, go home and change first and you haven't slept too! Dara noona will get mad at us if you fell ill too!" Seungri was looking at his hyung with worried eyes, with Dara noona they saw Jiyong's other personality. his firsts. It was the first time seeing Jiyong this down and sad. He looked hurt. Worried. Name it all. 

"Jiyong if you don't want to go home then at least sleep even for a bit eh? We'll take care of her while you sleep" Seunghyun said

"Hyung, why isn't she waking up yet?"

"She'll be fine Jiyong-ah. The doctors said so right?"

"But-"

"Maybe if you take a rest she'll wake up after you" Youngbae butted in, Jiyong looks more sick than Dara is. He looks like hell

"Ne hyung we'll wake you up if ever she wakes up!" Daesung said, praying hard that Dara will wake up fast

"We'll buy lunch hyung, you better sleep when we get back!"

It took them an hour or so, they decided to just eat at Jolibee near the hospital she's been admitted. Dang the Sandara effect. They were all holding their stomach when they went back to the room, carrying one bucket of fried chicken and some burgers and spaghetti. 

"Maybe if Dara noona smells this she'll wake up fast" Seungri chuckled, remembering her adorkable expression while eating Jolibee

"Hope so too. Jiyong looks like hell. It's the first time I saw him like that." Seunghyun sighed

"It'll get better." Youngbae draped his arm in Seungri and just tapped Seunghyun while coughing awkwardly

"Hyung, Seunghyun hyung needs some comfort too. Put your hands around him too" Seugri teased, knowing too well that Youngbae can't reach Seunghyun's

"YAH!" Youngbae ran after Seungri who rushed towards the hospital's elevator. Leaving them with a fuming Youngbae. The only thing that'll make Youngbae annoyed is by mentioning his height. 

========================================================================================================

She slowly opened her eyes, staring at the ceiling blankly. She feels nothing...empty.

Why am I still alive? Why did they save me? They should've let me die. I don't want to live anymore. Please.

A lone tear fall down her cheeks

Please just let me die. I don't want this pain anymore.

Another tear fell, and another, until her shoulders shook, biting her lips just to stop the ugly sobs threatening to come out of .She can already taste a bit of her blood from too much biting of her lower lip. 

"Stop, please" her eyes widen, just as a hand touch her lips, releasing her already bruised lips from her teeth. "Dara" his voice is hoarse, his hands shaking while caressing her bruised lips. 

She slowly turned to her side and saw him, saw his sad eyes staring at her in pity. She hates it...The look of pity in his eyes, it fills her with rage. 

"Why did you saved me?" she hoarsely whispered. As if is full of sand. 

"What?"

"You should've let  me die" 

"Do you hear yourself right now?!" he whispered angrily, containing his building anger. He wants to shake her badly, trash the whole place just to not hurt her right now

"You shouldn't have saved me." her eyes was blank, void of any emotion. The old Sandara's nowhere to be seen. 

"Why?" despair filled him, helpless, drained, he don't know what to do anymore. He rather receive Dara's witty remark than this Dara in front of him. 

"Because I don't want to exist anymore. I don't want to feel this pain anymore Jiyong" her brows furrowed, as if she's having an internal war inside her head

"Maybe you should sleep some more dee, you're just tired" he stood up and fixed her blanket, he leaned closer to her to kiss her lips but she moved her head, making him kiss her cheeks only. It pains him seeing her like this, it pains him thinking that Dara doesn't need him. 

"I should sleep. forever" Deciding to make it pass, pretending that he didn't heard her, he stood up and walk towards the sofa "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to sleep too. This is a ing nightmare I choose not to dwell on" he shrugged nonchalantly, as if it didn't nerved him

"You can go home now." she coldly said, not looking at him

"Go to sleep"

"I said you can go home now! I don't need you here!" she shouted loudly, shocking him. He saw her removed her IV and threw the blanket at the floor, she's about to climb out of the bed when he quickly stood up, stopping her from moving.

"Don't you dare step foot out of the bed Sandara Park, you don't want to see me get angry" he whispered angrily, his heart aches, but he chose to understand her, among anyone else he should be the one who understands her the most. 

"I don't want you here." It was the last thing that he expected to hear from her...but it was the last words his heart would be able to bear.