It was the middle of week 3 and you wernt looking forward to it as things with you and kikwang had become intense, since his new found fame with the popular girls even now the popular boys thought he was cool to hang out with..so you didnt really see much of him around school...only after school when you would drop mai off.....

"ya what's up with you?...you dont seem yourself these days" kikwang said as you walked in the front door

"nothings wrong" you lied

"well wae dont i believe you"

"i dont know .......just leave it kikwang" you say handing him mai and going to walk out

"yaa ____, talk to me" he says sweetly

"i cant i have to go...ill see you at school tomorrow" you say and walk out

Dear Diary

kikwang really dont have a clue..i mean since he had his make-over and been hanging with the popular kids we aint spoke ...i mean i know im pretty clueless but even i would of worked that one out...wae did i have to fall for him..out of all the guys and i fall for the one that goes and gets popular....

_ _

the next morning you woke up and was so tierd as you had that nightmare again and once again you woke up during the night screaming and crying, SOL came in a stayed with you....

"sorry im not here to make you breakfast, GD called he got stranded i have to go save his again...ill see you when i get home,. have a nice day..love you

SOL x

*great* you thought , you had forgot to make yourself breakfast( more like you just didnt bother with it) and get ready for school....

down the street you hear someone calling you but you ignore it

"____,  _____, yaaaaa" suzy shouts catching up to you

"wakey wakey helloooooo, didnt you hear me calling?"

"oh sorry, im not really with it today" you reply

"long night huh? did you have mai" she asks looking at you for a sign of the baby

"shes with kikwang" you say

you both walk to school in silence suzy knew something was up but didnt want to fource you to tell her..you would tell her in your own time..

(in class)

you take your seat and look over at kikwangs seat.....empty....*where is he* you think..just then he walks in with the popular girls and boys laughing and smiling like they were the best of friends...

you pull a face and look down , kikwang looks over at you and sees your face..*she looks like she's carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders* he thinks to himself

"yaa kiki" one of the girls calls..you cant help but look up at his new nickname *kiki what the hell is up with that?* you think

kikwang catches you looking at him and smiles at you...*there he goes again giving me that heart melting smile* you think and just give a half smile and look away..

"ok class as you know tomorrow is the last day of the project so i hope you have all worked hard and had a new experience,. please sit with your partners as im going to hand out a questionaire for you both to fill out" your teacher tells you...

kikwang gets up and comes to sit with you, you dont even look at him your just watching the boy handing out the papers...thing is you wanted to look anywhere else but at him....

you both start filling out the questionaire.."ya what did you write for that?" kikwang whispers pointing to a question,. you look over and just turn your paper for him to copy.....*what is up with her....what have i done* he thinks

he pulls out another piece of paper and starts writing..

ya whats going on? youve been off with me since...well since i got rid of my glasses whats going on with you? i cant help you if you dont talk to me...or am i the reason your acting like this? cos your ok with suzy....

he pushes the paper over to you and you read it then write..

nothings wrong with me, i just had a bad night thats all....

thats all you write back... he frowns at your reply and just looks at you but you dont turn your head you pretend your reading a question...

at lunch you walk over to your tree and sit there with suzy....

"ya i know you would talk to me when your ready but....i dont like seeing you like this...whats going on, let me help you..please" she says

"im fine....really i..i just cant stand seeing him with them, there so fake and they gave him a nickname ...kiki" you say

looking up you see kikwang sitting with the popular kids and he seems so happy.......

after school you rush home to only be greeted by your brothers crazy friend

"yaaaaaaa theres my baby girl" GD tells you giveing you a big cuddle

"ya GD your breaking my bones here" you say with your face sqwashed into his chest

"haha sorry, soooo whats going on with you? tell GD all about it" he says with a smile

see you had always had a crush on him and he thought it was cute..but being his best friends little sister he would never go there, he loved you but as a sister....

"nothings going on with me, school but i deal with it" you say giving him a smile

"ahhh...ok then well im staying for a few days so we can catch up" he smiles at you

"great" you say

"you being sarcastic?"

"GD im happy to see you, ive just had a long day please forgive me" you knew that it wernt fair to take your troubles out on him....

"dinner will be ready in about........well not yet" SOL says from the kitchen with a giggle

your sitting down with GD and just talking and some how he always makes you laugh.....

the night was spent with watching tv, talking, GD being goofy and silly dances from him and SOL..

the next day things were just as bad as the day before...

(at home)

"so what do you think?" SOL asks

"hmm,. i see what you mean about her not being herself....but shes in a new school it might just be taking some time to get use to" GD offers

"theres more to it,...but i dont know what it is,. i know shes different since we lost our parents but man come on she just looks.......unhappy and i hate it, i hate seeing her like that"

"dont worry a few days with GD and she will be back to herself again" he says with a smile

SOL just nods...not convinced

(at school)

it was the day to hand over your babies and diaries since kikwang had mai he handed her and the diairy to the teacher...

"after lunch i will give you your marks...i hope you have all done well" he says

in class your in your own little world you dont even hear the bell ring for break " ____, its break time" your teacher pulls you out of your little world, you get up and walk to your locker to put some books in and get some others out and close the door ..

*crash*

the popular girl had smacked your books so they fell on the floor "so clumsy.......freak" she says then walks off

you decied youve had enough and go sit in the toilets for the whole of break time *what are you doing hiding in the toilet? get the hell up and face her......or just hide and hope she goes away* you think to yourself

at lunch you decied the safest place to be is in the toilets ..so there you are eating your lunch in the toilets alone......

in class the teacher gives your marks out "while i have to say im impressed with some of you..and a little surprised with some others" he says and goes on to tell certain pairs about something he was happy about or surprised about "_____ and kikwang you did very well, it showed up that your baby laughed a very good amount while i am curious as to why she has scratches on her?"

"a friends cat used her as a scratch post" kikwang says putting his head down

"well apart from that im very happy with what i have seen" he says with a smile..you dont comment on anything and just stay quiet...

(a few days had passed)

Dear Diary

the baby project is over and i feel weird ....i kinda miss mai as weird as it sounds but i do.....kikwang and me havent really spoke hes always busy making the popular girls laugh with his dorky faces......what i thought happend....we stoped being friends we aint really spoke since we handed mai back.......so i now only have one friend..suzy, shes been great she dont like the new kikwang either ...so im not the only one huh

_ _

most of the day in school was the same kikwang would walk in with the popular kids laughing, he would be seen at lunch time with them being a dork,all the girls were all over him and the guys were ...well being idiots.....and you , you were back to sitting under your tree with suzy listening to music sharing earphones.. things seemed calm when you were with suzy...it was nice ..but then you would hear a burst of laughter and know who it was from.....kikwang and his friends...

you hated that he was now with the popular kids, why did he have to have that make-over? wae couldnt be still be the dorky,geeky kikwang you saw on the first day......the kikwang you fell for...

walking home your thinking about all of this and your close to tears when a tap on the shoulder makes you jump....*popular kid* you think and turn around to see....

kikwang  *like i said popular kid* you think again

"ya i was calling you....i aint seen you in a while i wanted to see how you were" he says

"ha you aint seen me in a while cos youve been surrounded by a bunch of paranas" you say

"ya whats with the attitude?" he asks

"you dont talk to me,dont even look at me and you dont hang out with me anymore...then you say you aint seen me in a while and get mad cos i called your friends paranas......that a good enough reason for me to have an attitude?" you say

"well...i..i.." you what kikwang, you thought oh ive ditched _____, long enough maybe ill go and rub it in her face that im popular and shes not" you cut him off

"thats not why i came to see you.. but if your going to bite my head off then maybe ill just go"

"fine ...go its not like were friends anymore after all you have thousands of friends and girls who like you now huh so who needs me" you snap..kikwang is shocked

"what did you say that for?"

"you really dont get it do you.....i like you ..i liked you from the first day, i see you for who you are, i see you for whats inside you not like them who only see you as the totally handsome guy that has a smile that can melt anyones heart, the guy who pulls silly faces but looks so freaking cute while doing it..thats the guy they all see cos you had a make-over" you stop for a minute "which in my opinion you didnt need cos your perfect just the way you are.....answer me something..when did they all start talking to you?" you ask but kikwang dont say anything..."when you looked geeky or now since your make-over?" you carry on

"now.......only now they see a handsome guy that has a smile that melts hearts......i saw that the first day,...i saw then what they see now" you say

"but you call me a geek" is all kikwang can say

"nae i do.....but your my geek..i was friends with THAT kikwang.........long before THIS kikwang"

"kikwang i know your happy with all that has changed now..but there not your friends, there not your friends for the right reasons.."

"wae are you my friend then?" he asks

"cos you have a great heart,your funny,smart a little clumsy and crazy and because you saw me....you saw me when noone else did...you became my friend..them people you call your friends bully me they have done from day one i came to school 3 days before you and since then thats all they have done" you say and your out of breath totally caught up in the moment you didnt even realise all of what you just said..

kikwang is in shock and dont even know how to answer you...you just shake your head and walk away...kikwang wants to follow you but his legs wont move...

kikwangs at home and still dont know what the hell just happend..

Dear Diary

______, just screamed at me and i mean she just .........screamed, i dont think she even realised she just told me she likes me or used to..im not sure....she basically told me she dont like the new me she liked the old me....ive hurt her cos shes never screamed at me like that before and the whole time i was looking into her eyes and i could see the hurt behind them..the hurt shes been hiding...the hurt i caused.......what have i done......i just lost the first friend i ever made, the only person who liked me for me and not this kikwang.......i hurt her so bad.....ive lost her..i wanted to chase after her but my legs wouldnt move...what have i done?

Kikwang :(

at home you needed to calm down and thankfully SOL and GD wernt in , so you run a bath and take a long soak in it ....

*did i really just say all that to kikwang,. did i just let him know he hurt me? did i just scream at him in the street? what came over me, ive never acted like that with anyone....what have i done?.... will he forgive me? should he? or is he the one that should be looking for forgivness,. i dont know im so confused.......what have i done?* you think to yourself while letting the tears fall down your cheeks.......

will kikwang stick with his new friends or will he stick by the one friend who stuck by him?

will he find a way to get you to forgive him......will you even forgive him?

either way both of you are hurt...your hurt because of kikwang and the fact that you shouted at him,...he's hurt because he hurt you....