That day is burned into my memory, the sky was clear, a magnificent bright blue. We were all lined up, shortest to tallest. Pre pubescent children- boys about to have their innocence taken much before their time. I was nine, the youngest out of the twelve. 

 

It was the day of incomprehensible injustice. And I cannot fathom how humanity has been reduced to this. 

 

I read about the war, I read about the Nazi's immense genocide, I read about black slavery too, and close to home too. I read about the Japanese invading both Korea and China slaughtering millions, and how they were saved by America, but only by use of nuclear weapons bombing ancient cities like Hiroshima and Nagasaki, everybody has blood on their hands. Which is why I cannot understand why humans- we think we are so superior we call ourselves a peaceful species. It's a lie. 

 

Or maybe I focus too much on the bad things to notice the good. 

 

It's a plausible thought, after all. 

 

That day, was the beginning of our suffering. But it was the day I met Luhan and I wouldn't give that up for the world. 

 

I think people see Luhan as an unstable. I don't think they realise that they're wrong, or perhaps unstable is the wrong word. 

 

Luhan is fragile. A boy who is afraid to go to war. A boy whose father gave him away. A boy who is terrified of thunder. 

 

Sometimes I feel I care about him more than I should. 

 

---- 

 

"Sehun" Luhan whispered hoarsely "Don't go- don't leave me" 

 

"Luhan, I'm not going anywhere" Sehun replied impatience in his tone "calm down" 

 

"I'm going to go with you" 

 

"You have tests" 

 

"Don't care" 

 

"Luhan I'm being serious here" 

 

"Yeah? Well so am I!" Luhan snapped "I cannot be apart from you, especially because it's the day" 

 

"You make it sound so ominous" Sehun muttered dryly picking at the moss outside on the courtyard they were sitting on.

 

"Seriously why did it have to be you?" Luhan sobbed "You're the youngest! It's not fair!" 

 

"Hey- Luhan it's okay, look I'll be fine, don't worry about me okay? They're branding us today too you know, worry about yourself for once" 

 

"They don't own us, how can they call it branding? It's disgusting!" 

 

"Luhan, you need to calm down" 

 

"Don't tell me to calm down when the reality is I might not ever see you again!" Luhan cried hysterically jabbing his finger into Sehun's bony shoulder continuously until Sehun wrapped his arms around the smaller boy and ignoring the struggles and feeble slaps made by Luhan until he gave in and let himself just cry his tears staining Sehun's white shirt. 

 

"Don't say that" Sehun whispered quietly. It was then that Luhan realised that Sehun was terrified too, and it made him feel horrible because here he was comforting him when he was probably a wreck himself. 

 

"You're right I'm sorry" Luhan pulled away abruptly "I'm still going with you though" He said defiantly while wiping the tears from his face. Sehun sighed. 

 

"Luhan I'm not sure that's a good idea" 

 

"Please, I don't want you to be alone" 

 

"Fine, I won't argue with you, it's too much energy but let's go back now, I need to go talk to Joonmyun he feels terrible" 

 

Luhan ignored the sinking feeling his heart had, it was a strange emotion, he has experienced it a lot. But in this century, feelings are hidden, suppressed, because feelings get in the way. Feelings cause hurt which manifests into hate. And hate is war. 

 

"Hey no frowning" Sehun smiled teasingly "you're still my favourite" giving him a small hug that sent shivers down both their spines. 

 

"I-I-I really can't live without you Sehun" and it scared him because he had no clue why. 

 

"You won't ever have to" 

 

"I'm sorry because I feel I cause you a lot of trouble- and pain while the others don't really have the patience for me but you do and I mean you're probably terrified of this too, I know I would be... I just have more time to be terrified and you're comforting me, it should be the other way round, and I'm older than you too!" Luhan griped as he kicked at the grey concrete of the block that towered above them and shot up into the clouds, kilometres high, it startled Luhan that some people do not know a life of living on the ground, with the earth beneath their feet. If you could still call it that. 

 

Sehun stared at him for a long moment, his expression unreadable, like it is most of the time, but of course Luhan knew there was emotion under the mask, it was just hiding. "Luhan I think maturity wise I'm miles older" he smiled slightly "you shouldn't worry about me, I'll be fine" 

 

"You know you say that a lot but are you ever really?"

 

"Sometimes" 

 

They had reached the automatic doors now and Luhan was calmer now, more prepared, more hopeful, because Sehun would come back to him alive. Functioning, breathing. 

 

"Whenever it isn't okay... Whenever you aren't fine, come to me" he whispered quietly into Sehun's ear 

 

Sehun doesn't answer but he laces their fingers together. 

 

It's a good enough answer for Luhan. 

 

"I can hear Joonmyun crying from here" Sehun groaned carding his platinum locks "I think we should hurry" 

 

Luhan nods and they jog together hands still intertwined and Luhan feels a swelling in his heart, but he stops it abruptly because feelings get in the way. Feelings are the road to the destruction. 

 

---- 

 

"Joonmyun please stop" Sehun entered the room quietly Luhan in tow, no one noted the way their hands were joint. 

 

"No! It's my fault! It's my father! I should be first!" 

 

Sehun sighed "it's not your fault, honestly what does it matter? What's the significance of it? It's going to happen to all of us at some stage, and I had it easy with testing, I wasn't electrocuted, or shoved in a room of flames, I wasn't held underwater till I passed out either, it's okay I'm fine with going so don't drown yourself in guilt Joonmyun, it really isn't your fault your father is an idiot, we don't blame you, we never did so stop worrying okay? I'll be fine" 

 

Jongin smiled at him "it's hard to 

believe you're the youngest of us" 

 

His smile disappeared though when Joonmyun's father appeared his clipboard in hand. They still called it a clipboard- though it didn't have a clip anymore, they had a similar resemblance to a tablet from the old days, it was essentially just a slab of glass with electrical properties, Jongin could see the blue writing scrawled over it messily. 

 

"Oh Sehun" he called out his white coat falling to his ankles "we're ready for you now" 

 

"I'm coming with him" Luhan told the scientist eyes hard "I won't take no for an answer" 

 

The scientist looked at him skeptically "Fine we'll brand you first and insert your chips if you must come we might as well do something productive" 

 

"Chip?" Joonmyun asked his father, mouth set in a straight line, his father looked back at him a hint of guilt in his eyes "Well?" 

 

"We have put you into pairs, if ever the twelve of you are separated you shall always split in pairs and we have arranged those for you in order to make things easier, you will each have two chips inserted in your brain, it's a fairly simple task, no anaesthetic is required it should take five or ten minutes one chip is for your pair, the other is for you as a twelve" 

 

"Well thanks for that" Joonmyun said bitterly "but what do they actually do?" 

 

"Means of communication, it allows you to read the minds of your team and therefore you will know their movements in battle which is an advantage" 

 

"Did you consider that we actually want privacy of our own thoughts?" Yifan asked suddenly.

 

"Of course you have the option to turn it off, it also acts as a communication device and gps" 

 

"So who are the pairs?" Joonmyun asked his father curiously, he wanted to know whom exactly his father put him with. 

 

"Well, it was decided years back when you first entered the cells. Sehun and Luhan are together. Baekhyun and Chanyeol

Kris and Zitao 

Xiumin and Chen 

Suho and Lay 

Kyungsoo and Kai" 

 

"My name wasn't read out" Minseok squeaked quietly, Jongdae nodded with him in agreement. And Yixing simply asked "Whose Lay?" 

 

"Lay is you Yixing" the scientist said warily "Suho is Joonmyun, Xiumin is Minseok, Jongdae is Chen" 

 

"But why?"

 

"Because your files indicate that it would be best to keep your identity hidden" 

 

"Why though?" Jongdae frowned 

 

"Your clones were defected, they disappeared as of now your families think you are missing, it would be too risky to send out another clone it will create suspicion the cases are being treated as homocide at this point but anything can happen, we're just taking precaution" 

 

"You mean your letting my mother think I'm dead" Jongdae asked his eyes empty and frown on his face. 

 

"Correct, Joonmyun and Yifan are too closely related to personnel in the government"

 

"I wish I wasn't" 

 

It was hard not to notice the wince Joonmyun's father made. 

 

"So that means I'm Kai then huh?"

 

"You're clone self destructed, it killed itself" 

 

"And that required a name change?" 

 

"It's precautionary, anyway. Sehun" he paused "Luhan? Come this way please" 

 

Sehun waved half heartedly "See you on the other side" 

 

----

 

"So the procedure goes like this" Joonmyun's father began "It's a base procedure that will be done on all twelve of you, basically all we do is enhance your vision and hearing to super human levels, you will be able to see the whole spectrum from infrared to ultraviolet you will be able to hear things from hundreds of kilometres away, and you will be able to hear things humans would never be able to, we start with the easy procedures first- they have a faster recovery time" 

 

"You call that easy" Sehun muttered avoiding Luhan's fear stricken eyes. 

 

"Well compared to the other procedures, yes" 

 

"Alright let's just get this over with" Sehun sighed standing up "where do you want me?" 

 

"We will brand you first along with Luhan and insert the chips, it's a good thing you two are paired together" 

 

Luhan just stared at the man before him, how he talked about their lives so casually, his mind was seething in hatred, and all he could see was grey, grey, grey. 

 

Sehun however didn't. Luhan knew this, Sehun thinks in colours, it was contradictory given his pessimistic personality. It didn't make sense. However nothing involving Sehun really makes sense. 

 

"There is symbolism in colour" Sehun told Luhan once, Luhan had snuck into his and Joonmyun's room one night when the nightmares kept coming and together they whispered about the moon and the stars. Together they whispered broken dreams. Luhan had snorted at that. 

 

"In the old days perhaps, why think of such a thing?" 

 

"Because if I didn't, I'd go mad" 

 

"Oh but didn't you know? We're all mad here" 

 

Sehun had frowned at the bitter words coming from Luhan's mouth and wondered what on earth could have been the trigger. "Don't say things like that" he replied tersely staring out the tiny window, the small piece of sky. 

 

Luhan opened his eyes in surprise to stare at Sehun "but why not? We both know it's true" 

 

"Even so" Sehun paused and flicked his eyes downward to look back at the wide eyes staring up at him "your mouth is too pretty for such vulgar sayings" 

 

"I have worse" Luhan murmured looking away "much, much worse" 

 

"Try see things in colour for once Luhan" Sehun advised sighing a little "the world is not all black and white, and even if it is there would still be a million and one shades of grey" 

 

"Sehun what's your favourite colour?" Luhan changed the subject briskly, he wasn't sure why, but the world wasn't something he wanted to talk about just yet. 

 

"I don't know, I like all of them" 

 

"Red is the colour of blood. How is that even remotely likeable" 

 

Sehun smiled "I'll show you sometime" 

 

A few weeks later Sehun tip toed into Luhan's shared room with Yifan awaking him with a tap on the shoulder and a lopsided grin, jersey in one hand and two protein bars in the other. 

 

"Luhan, come with me" 

 

Luhan grumbled but came along with him anyway quietly stumbling out of bed and into the jumper that Sehun had held out for him. Then proceeding to follow him outside the block building, the crisp morning air was a new thing for him, he had never been awake before dawn and he found it was quite enjoyable, the air even smelling fresh which was saying a lot in this day and age. 

 

However when Sehun climbed through a hold in the wired fence he hesitated hissing "Oh Sehun what do you think you are doing?! We could get caught!" 

 

Sehun smiled at him again his face split into diamonds from the pattern of the fence he stuck his tongue out "C'mon Luhan I've been up here a lot just trust me! You have to hurry or we'll miss it!" 

 

Luhan had never seen Sehun this happy and it ignited a spark of curiosity, "miss what? Oh Sehun what is this about?" 

 

"It's about you and your in appreciation of the spectrum"

 

Luhan grumbled "Well what's the point in seeing life in colour when we know our future is so bleak?" 

 

"You know- everyone knows- even I know that I'm the most pessimistic person there is. But Luhan colour is the only thing in this world that makes me feel truly happy" Sehun paused "Well that and one person" 

 

"Who?" Luhan asked whilst crawling through the hole in the barbed wire fence. He ignored the way his heart twitched with pain. Feelings again. 

 

"He was my first friend" Sehun said fondly "Some think he's a little crazy but I know better, he's not crazy at all, he just needed a friend, someone to look out for him, he's come a long way, the boy who was scared of everything, while the rest danced in the rain he hid under the table in the lab, I like to think his heart will eventually heal- but it's a big ask, especially when mine is equally as wounded, I can't help him that much- not like I used to and for that I'm sorry" 

 

"But why can't you help him?" 

 

"Because I grew up, and the innocence I had been shrouded in was lifted" 

 

Luhan didn't reply after that and Sehun jumped up onto a tree on the out skirts of the forests- they were lucky the cell grounds were levelled, but it is normal, because once you use all the surface area. The only way is up. 

 

What a contradiction- because humanity is certainly crashing down. 

 

They settled on a thick branch, the leaves were green. Not a natural green though. It was Limey, bright, unnatural, it hurt to look at in broad daylight, almost as if the exerted sunlight, but they both knew it wasn't the earth creating these too green leaves. It was genetic splicing. 

 

But it was edging on dawn and the sky was still a purple black, Venus was looking down on them along with the moon. 

 

"It's a full moon" Luhan observed pulling his hood up to prevent his ears from getting cold and Sehun handed him a protein bar. 

 

"Yeah, it's the beginning of March" 

 

"Spring" 

 

"Mmm" Sehun tore open the wrapper and shoved it in his pocket before taking a bite, chewing slowly "now hush, and watch" 

 

"There's nothing to watch, apart from the moon" 

 

"Just wait"  

 

And Luhan waited, Sehun didn't speak again, he waited for ten minutes and nothing had happened he was about to open his mouth and complain when he saw it. 

 

Out of the corner of his eye he saw it. At some point in time, there is a shift. This point of time converges between sleep and awake, a hazy dream of half consciousness. This shift is along the horizon, where the black sky begins to fade leaving a soft yet somehow exuberant pink in it's wake. This shift is the world awakening. Not only that but it stirred something in Luhan's heart, and it was coming to him again. Feelings. He must refrain from those. Although on this morning, at some point in the twenty fifth century there is a boy who is so compelled to feel nothing. Feels everything. He let's them in. Surprisingly Luhan finds, it feels good letting his heart twist and twinge as the colours dance across the sky, merging into one another. Trying to become one. He feels a cool hand wrap itself around his own, he looks up and there are tears in his eyes. "Thank you for showing me this Sehun. Red is beautiful" 

 

Sehun wanted to tell him that actually there were hundreds of shades of red up there, along with pinks and oranges and yellows. But he'll take baby steps. He thinks even if they are spliced to hell, to the point they cannot even recognise himself, even if that happens. He will teach Luhan about every colour there ever was. 

 

And Luhan feels it's nice when Sehun is surrounded in colour. Because when that happens the pessimism is gone. And with time Luhan feels that maybe colour can heal him too. 

 

Sehun may call himself a pessimist, he may feel others call him a pessimist but Luhan knows he isn't. 

 

Sehun is and will always be a closet optimist. Too afraid to show it, too afraid of being let down, so he quenches it with a ton of pessimism. It counteracts. It smothers. And it leaves everyone in his wake at a loss. 

 

Which brings us back to the present. At some point in the twenty fifth century Luhan and Sehun are lying side by side on hospital beds staring at each other intently. Luhan sees the conflict in Sehun's eyes, so desperate to believe he'll survive, too afraid believe that he will. 

 

A conflict only resolved with an inevitable outcome. His Sehun with a  sixty percent chance of survival, seventy on a good day. 

 

I should tell him I love him. 

 

They think simultaneously, the thought disappears promptly when the burning sensation begins, behind the ears a stamp of hot ink burned into flesh. Sehun closes his eyes not wanting to see Luhan's eyes filled with intense pain. 

 

He may be horrible with feeling with his head. But his body often betrays him.

 

The next thing he feels is an incision at the base of the neck with two sharp objects being shoved in the wound before being welded shut once more. 

 

"Sehun" he hears the scientist say with his white coat "keep your mind blank, we're going to put you under anaesthetic now, keep your mind clear or it will interfere with operating, it is a form of neurosurgery might I remind you" 

 

But Sehun isn't listening, he looks at Luhan, he's crying now and Sehun feels tears on his cheeks too. And his mind reels. The spectrum flashes before him. Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet. They all blend together in his mind like a kaleidoscope before he feels a sharp jab in his hand and the colours start to turn and nothing makes sense anymore. 

 

The last thing he hears. Or at least thinks he hears is a sad voice calling. 

 

"Sehun don't go" the voice is sad and is strange like it's in the back of his mind. Like it's himself talking. 

 

But it all goes black before then. 

 

And the colour vanishes just as abruptly as it appeared.