While you looked at your grandfather he took your face between his hand palms looking into your eyes "You're having a hard time don't you?" You didn't say anything and just started to cry digging your face into his shoulder. "It's alright" he comforted you as he your hair. "I don't know what to do gramps. I miss him so much" you sobbed pleading for help. "It's alright child" he whispered "We'll figure something out like we always do". Your grandmother reached out her hand to you "Avery?!" she whispered carefully looking at you. "Nana" you whispered wiping the tears from your cheeks sitting down next to the bed holding your grandma's hand. "Can you leave us alone for a little bit?" she asked looking at your grandfather as she wanted to talk to you privately. As soon as your grandfather walked out she looked back at you "Child you shouldn't be so sad". "I know" you sniffed, but...everything is so complicated right now. I just don't know what to do". Your grandma caressed your cheeks "I think your mother wants you to be happy. Don't be sad and don't worry too much. It's going to be alright. You'll be a great mother". You blinked your eyes. Does she know you're pregnant? How? "Nana....how do you..." Your grandma smiled "Nana knows everything" and tucked your blond hair behind your ear. "You look exactly like your mother and you have the same glow on your face when your mother was pregnant with you". "Really?" you asked in disbelief. Nana nodded "Definitely. I know you're having a hard time with your mother in law". "Wait Nana, how do you know all this?" you asked confused since you never really told anyone in your family. You did it on purpose so they would not worry about you. "Your mother, she's watching over you" your grandmother revealed. You looked down and started to cry all over again "I miss her nana" you sobbed digging your face in grandmother’s chest. "I know child. I miss her too" your grandma whispered. "Listen I want to give you something". You rose your head while your grandmother grabbed a box from the bedside table and handed it to you "What's this?" "Take a look. Your mother wanted you to have it" your grandmother smiled at you. You lifted the top of the box finding her flowered diary and letters addressed to you 'To my daughter on her wedding day' and a few other ones. You took out a jewelry box with her earrings and your own from when you were a baby. You found a baby photo album. As soon as you looked through it you started to cry like a little child while your grandmother was squeezing your hand. "I also want you to have this" and handed you a small jewelry box. You opened the little box and took out a long necklace not sure at first what it was. "It's a pregnancy necklace. I wore this when I was pregnant with your mother. Your mother wore it when she was having you. My mother gave it to me and now I'm passing it on to you" she explained. You were speechless and gladly took it "Thank you nana. It's beautiful" and put it around your neck.

Your grandmother took your hand in hers "Everything's going to be alright. Your mother wants you to be happy. She knows how much you want this baby. She's with you and watches over you" You smiled between your tears at your nana's words "It's not that I don't want this baby. I'm just terrified of doing it alone" you confessed. "Sweetheart, you're not alone! You have a man that loves you despite of his mother's behavior. It's not his fault, besides your mom sent him to you" your grandmother explained. "Nana..." you sobbed starting to cry again. You haven't cried so much as in the last few weeks. "What do I do? I miss him" you confessed resting your head on her chest crying out all the pain before you were close to calming down. Your grandmother your hair while she started to talk to you about your mother. How much you looked like her as well as in appearance as your way of doing things. She told you everything you and your mother did together and how proud your mother always was showing you off with pride. You smiled hearing about your mother's life and started to come down again. It was as if you never missed out on anything hearing every little thing. Your grandmother's heartbeat was fading. You rose your head. "Nana?!" you started panicking "Nana?!". Even though you were calling out her name you knew there was no use. She was gone. You started to cry all over again while your grandpa, your dad, your aunt and your niece came into the room as well to say their goodbyes. It was the hardest thing for everyone and you knew that she was going to go at some point but you just wish she could have seen your children, but that was never going to happen. Everyone in the room said their goodbyes as the air was filled with sadness and grief. She was like a mother to you. Now you were left with none.  In the meantime in Gangwon-Do, South Korea Jonghyun was 'enjoying' his night off reading a book, but he couldn't focus on the content at all. Instead he couldn't stop thinking of you after the letter he received from his sister and wondered how he never heard anything from you. He was worried and had all the right reasons to be. He felt like a lion in a cage, restless. All he really wanted was to be with you and tell you that everything was going to be perfectly fine. He looked out of his window looking up at the gloomy moon 'Baby just please stay strong. I'll be home soon'.
 

Months passed faster than expected. You said goodbye to your grandmother and decided to stay with your dad in Tennessee for a little while longer. You found a little bit of peace being with your family. You enjoyed the little and the good things again and surprisingly Mrs. Kim didn't try anything in the past few months. Did she finally gave up? Or is it just a part of her scheme and is it all a show? You didn't know, in fact nobody else did, but you were happy you didn't have to see and face her. On the 14th of November you finally gave birth to a healthy baby boy named Kim JungHwa. Never in the world did you think you were able to do it, but you were happy your best friend was there to support you. That day was tough and you wished more than anything in the world Jonghyun could be there with you instead. The giving birth process wasn't easy and sure as hell was painful, but as soon you got to hold your son after being in labor for twenty-two hours, you forgot all about it. It was it all worth it. Spending a first Christmas and New Year's without Jonghyun. Every single second you thought about him and about what he was doing. Being separated with the holidays wasn’t so easy, but you were glad you were in Tennessee with your family instead of being alone in Seoul feeling miserable. JungHwa was now almost four months old and started to grow into a handsome little boy. Every day he started to look more and more like his daddy, at least that's what you thought. No matter how tiring it was to look after a baby on your own, but seeing the little guys' face in the morning made you forget about everything else. He made your days so much better and gave you so much love. He's your everything and the little bundle of love that will forever connect you with Jonghyun. You did the usual as soon as you woke up checking on your little boy who was sleeping in the same room as you in his little crib. You stepped out of bed finding JungHwa awake studying the stuffed animal he was holding in his hands. The second you hung over the crib he got distracted by your shadow starting to bounce his little arms forgetting about his toy looking at you. You smiled from one ear to the other seeing your little boy's face. "Good morning gorgeous" you whispered while JungHwa started talk to you in baby language reaching his arms to you. "Hi" you sing-songed with a smile on your face and took your little man out of his crib giving him the biggest morning kiss holding him close to you. "Mommy shall make your bottle" and carefully rubbed his back making your way into the kitchen. As soon as you finished preparing his bottle you made your way to the couch and started to feed your son who didn't keep his eyes from you. Even the way he looked at you was just exactly like Jonghyun. "You look so much like your daddy" you whispered swallowing your tears kissing his fragile head while he gave you the 'don't be sad mommy' expression folding his little fingers around your hand. As soon as your little man finished his bottle you gave him a bath and dressed him and showered yourself as well while your dad was watching him. Your dad had been the biggest help since the day he was born and you sure were more than thankful to have him around. Today you decided to keep it quiet and toned down. The only thing you went out for was grocery shopping with your dad, but since it was raining outside you stayed inside to play with JungHwa instead.

Jonghyun in the meantime was allowed to go home for a few days and the first one he thought about was you. He couldn't stop smiling while he took the bus to Seoul and arrived in front of your house. But the closer he got to the house, he had the feeling it was abandoned and that was totally not like you. He looked through the window and didn't see anyone 'Avery where are you?' and started to get anxious and nervous at the same time. What if something happened to you while he was on duty? He walked around the house, but no one was there. He was impatient and quickly made his way to his parents’ house taking the bus which he rarely did. 'So this is what it feels like to take a bus?' He rushed into the yard and as soon as he entered the house, all he bumped into was one of the maids. "Damn it" he cursed scratching the back of his head. "J…Jonghyun, what are you doing here?" a man's voice came fr