If Jongwoon is asking Hyesung what happens next, what happens next is Kyuhyun doesn’t speak to him. Kyuhyun doesn’t look at him, and Kyuhyun doesn’t acknowledge his presence, and it almost seems like for Kyuhyun, Jongwoon does not exist.

“Why is he such an idiot?!” Sooyoung whines exasperatedly, standing from her seat beside Jongwoon.

Joohyun shoots her a look and she immediately sits back. It’s not going to help Jongwoon, whether they’ll point it out or not, that Kyuhyun is such an idiot. Jongwoon has just told them everything, the same thing he told Kyuhyun, not because he needs to explain himself and everything to Sooyoung and Joohyun but because he wants to tell them the truth.

“Calm down, Soo,” Jongwoon manages to say softly, and even though he knows they’re just trying to ease him, and he’s thankful, it’s Kyuhyun and they are not Kyuhyun.

He is playing with his hands, wondering if he and Kyuhyun will ever go back to how they were. “He has every right to be mad, and to be pissed, and to be confused, and to be frustrated, you know that, don’t you?”

Sooyoung scoffs and mutters, “Yeah.” Then, “But if he’s mad, and pissed, and confused, and frustrated, that doesn’t mean he should just ignore you and forget that you ever existed in his life. He shouldn’t forget that you did those things because you cared for him, and you protected him.”

Sooyoung can really speak her mind out if she wants to. She’s prank, and sometimes careless, but most of the time, when she speaks, she speaks what she thinks is right and even though Joohyun would talk to her about being sensitive about other’s feelings and what they’re going through when it’s just the two of them, Joohyun couldn’t say that she won’t agree with everything Sooyoung just said.

Jongwoon stops playing with his hands.

“Let’s just,” he starts, after taking a deep breath. “I’ll just give him the time he needs and maybe, everything will return to how they used to be.”

Joohyun, who has been quiet, asks, “How long, oppa?”

And even though there’s no clarification, or elaboration, or explanation, Jongwoon understands immediately what Joohyun means. How long is he going to give Kyuhyun time? How long is the time he’s going to give Kyuhyun? How long is he willing to wait until Kyuhyun comes back to him? Basically, how long?

It’s saddening, Jongwoon thinks, that waiting is an integral part of life. Waiting for the water to be hot, waiting for the meal to be cooked, waiting for the bus or a cab, waiting for the alarm to ring, waiting for a message or an email, waiting for a person to come back. It’s fine to wait, when you know that there’s something you’re waiting for. But what if there’s not? What if waiting is going to be futile? Are you still willing to wait?

“How long?” Jongwoon repeats, looking up at the sky. They’re at the roof top of the university’s building because the botanical garden is slightly off limits to them now. The sky looks beautiful and the clouds form different shapes Jongwoon can think of. It reminds him of Hyesung.

“For how long as it takes…”

Sooyoung and Joohyun looks a little surprised at first.

“It’s going to be fine, oppa,” Joohyun says, leaning her head at Jongwoon’s shoulder and taking his right hand so he’ll stop fiddling with them over and over again, a habit he do when he’s deep in thoughts.

Sooyoung does the same, leaning her head at Jongwoon’s shoulder and taking Jongwoon’s other hand. “It’s going to be fine, oppa,” she says as well.

Jongwoon looks up at the sky and the clouds, turning from bluish white to pinkish orange, and he wonders how something magnificent like the sky and the clouds can turn into something different and maintain its splendor. It changes from velvet dark during the evening, to bluish white during the day, and to pinkish orange when the sun’s about to set. It changes, but it’s still as wide as it is, as beautiful as ever.

Could something like that happen to Jongwoon’s life as well?

Is everything going to change, but ultimately remain the same?

“It’s going to be fine,” Jongwoon nods, more like a question to the clouds than affirming what Joohyun and Sooyoung just said.

Is it?

Kyuhyun wonders, if Jongwoon is really everything Yoona claims him to be, does that make him a bad person? If he really does love Jongwoon like that, is something wrong with that? Does that make Jongwoon bad? If he really does crossdress, is it so wrong as to condemn him like a criminal? Is he hurting someone? No. Is he killing, or robbing, or bullying anybody? No. Is that enough to condemn a person? If he really is gay, is it enough grounds for the world to turn its back on him?

He wonders of these things and he wonders what will these people do if they found out Jongwoon didn’t take his number from the university clan. If they found out that Jongwoon didn’t pretend to be a girl. If they found out that Jongwoon didn’t stalk Kyuhyun. If they found out that all along, Kyuhyun knew.

Why are people like that? Judging based on one fact?

Is being gay the entirety of a person?

It’s not even being gay.

It’s loving a person. It’s a person loving another person.

What is so wrong with that?

He thinks of all these things as he goes through another lunch, with Sungmin, Hyukjae, and Donghae. He doesn’t really wonder what’s going through his friends’ heads after what happened. None of them really asked him about it, and Kyuhyun thinks that maybe, he doesn’t really have to wonder about what’s going through their heads because they’re his friends, after all.

At least, that’s what Kyuhyun thinks until Hyukjae asks, “You’re friends with Kim Jongwoon, right? How’d you know him, Kyuhyun?”

Donghae throws a warning glance at Hyukjae’s direction, but it is ignored. It is obvious, because they’re both sitting across Kyuhyun. Sungmin, who’s sitting beside Kyuhyun, carefully puts down his chopsticks and stares at Hyukjae.

“Hyuk,” Donghae starts nervously.

“No, really, Kyuhyun,” Hyukjae doesn’t let Donghae finish. “How did you become friends with Kim Jongwoon?”

Kyuhyun isn’t stupid, but he won’t give Hyukjae the satisfaction. “In the choir, hyung,” he answers nonchalantly. “Why?”

“Nothing,” Hyukjae mutters.

They continue eating and Kyuhyun thinks it’s over, but apparently, it’s not because like what he thought, there’s something in Hyukjae’s mind and if there’s something in Hyukjae’s mind, trust Kyuhyun when he says that it won’t get unattended. Donghae gasps and looks at Kyuhyun worriedly as Sungmin angrily slams his chopsticks on the table and glares at Hyukjae when Hyukjae asks.

“Kyuhyun, are you gay?”

“Hyuk!” Donghae yells at Hyukjae.

“Calm down,” Hyukjae tells Donghae irritably. “I’m just asking him, Hae.”

Kyuhyun is silent, and even though he doesn’t really show any emotion of madness or something like that, like what Hyukjae probably expects from him, he is surprised. It sounds surprising to hear from someone else’s than when he thinks of it himself.

He looks at Hyukjae straightly and answers, “No.”

He is possibly in love with Jongwoon, though, and there’s a difference.

The sun is up, like how it is supposed to be, in the sea of blue and white skies and as Jongwoon admired its magnificence, he tries to forget the painful things, like how Kyuhyun is still not talking to him, or like how he has to give up basketball because of the issue (Apparently, it is bad image for the basketball team if this issue gets spread to other schools’ teams, and prevention is always better than cure.). He can stay, but he chose not to (What, with almost everyone on the team looking dirtily at him like he’ll ing do something to them during showers? No, thanks, but even though Jongwoon had worst than that, he isn’t a masochist.).

He thinks it will be best for Kyuhyun, too. Not that he’s much importance to the basketball team anyway.

He is waiting for Sooyoung and Joohyun at the botanical garden.

It’s been reclaimed. Jongwoon almost chuckles at the silliness of what he just thought. It’s not like the botanical garden is theirs or anything, but nobody really hangs out with the turtles and the fishes at the pond other than him, and then later on, Sooyoung and Joohyun, too, before. For a while, students are flocking there because Jongwoon is there, but they got tired.

People do get tired.

He suddenly realizes that Sooyoung and Joohyun will not be there for another hour, so he figures he should get something to eat at the cafeteria since he skipped lunch. He didn’t want to cause another staring mania over him at the cafeteria whenever he walks through during lunch break. It’s uncomfortable, and Jongwoon isn’t really that hungry anyway. He knows it’s dangerous, especially for his heart, but he’ll get through, or so that’s what he thinks.

Passing by the gymnasium, he sees the players practicing.

Kyuhyun doesn’t see him, but Siwon does, and he runs out the gymnasium, calling Jongwoon’s name.

“Jongwoon-hyung! Jongwoon-hyung!”

Jongwoon freezes and he is torn between running away from Siwon running towards him, or praying that there is another Jongwoon behind him that Siwon is calling. He isn’t given enough time to decide though as one second, Siwon is coaching his teammates, and the next, he’s hands are on his knees and he is panting in front of a frozen Jongwoon.

It’s apparent that there are students outside the gymnasium, watching the team’s practice.

It’s apparent that they see Siwon run towards Jongwoon.

It’s apparent that people are into a staring mania again starring Jongwoon and Siwon.

Jongwoon doesn’t know how many he’s got of this anymore but it’s not really a pretty feeling and he wishes to get this over with already. Siwon is a good person, for Jongwoon, but some are not and Jongwoon is very much aware of that now.

“Hyung!” Siwon greets him cheerfully, even hugging him, to Jongwoon’s surprise. He knows Siwon is a good person but to the extent of not being afraid to talk to him, and to even hug him, despite what happened, despite what everyone else – even Kyuhyun – is acting towards Jongwoon, it’s not sarcasm but Jongwoon wants to cry. “Long time no see! How have you been?”

He knows it’s probably impolite. No, it’s really impolite, because Siwon took the effort to run out of the gymnasium to actually talk to him, but Jongwoon doesn’t understand and he wants to understand because this is really new to him.

It’s not the answer Siwon is obviously expecting from what he asked, but Jongwoon answeres him with another question, “Siwon-ah, why are you talking to me?”

Siwon looks surprised, but he only smiles that handsome, kind smile at Jongwoon and answers with yet another question, “Why wouldn’t I, hyung?”

“The entire school isn’t talking to me. Nobody is talking to me,” Jongwoon finally answers this time, realizing that it’s unfair to Sooyoung and Joohyun who never left his side, sometimes quite literally, too. They’re too worried something might happen to Jongwoon if they let him out of their sight. But generally, what he said is true and he knows Siwon gets the point. Why is he talking to someone condemned by the entirety of school population?

“Doesn’t matter to me,” Siwon says, sounding both stubborn and kind to Jongwoon’s ears. “You’re a good upperclassman, hyung. You’re a good teammate. You’re a good person. You’re a good friend. Why wouldn’t I talk to you?”

Jongwoon is speechless.

“Truth shall prevail, hyung,”