" I finally saved up enough money for your surgery Bianca. How do you like the sound of that?"

        In that infinite moment, time once again stopped for me. Just like how it did when I was left behind by mother, alone and lonely with the endless and vain hope that my gentle Lu Han ge and mother would come back for me.

         But this time,it was different. It was fear of the unknown which held me back.Which paralyzed me.Which scared me.It's pathetic,really, but It's like a huge part of me used to being blind. I have never imagined that this day would ever come so soon. It's not that I doubted Baekhyun oppa's ability to earn enough to help me but... Being born blind, without even having one single glimpse of how the world looked like ever since then, made me rely only on my sense of hearing, touch, and smell. In my dreams (yes, blind people dreams too), they only consisted of sounds, voices, feelings, a variety of scents. Not to forget, pitch black and never ending darkness.

         What if this world wasn't how I wanted it to be?

         That was the moment when I realized the weight of Baekhyun oppa's previous question. His words echoed in my mind.

         What if this world is not as beautiful as you think it is?

         Fsshhhh.... Fsshhhh...."Earth to Bianca?" I snapped out of my reverie when Baekhyun oppa started making weird sound effects by gathering his saliva in his mouth, attempting to imitate how a lousy walkie-talkie signal would sound like. He is really good at making sound effects, but I would never ever admit it because he might get too full of himself and try to confuse and tease me by making odd sounds (my sense of hearing is especially sensitive you see, and he knows that).

        I must have been out of it for a long time since I did not even notice that his breath was literally lingering inches away from my face.His warm,slender but rough hands clasping my cheeks and his oh-so-familiar minty hot chocolate with a tiny mix of alcohol probably due to him working late at the pub scent shrouded me.

        Then it hit me and I chuckled lightly.

        "Yahh... Are you mocking me? I am being serious here!" Baekhyun oppa pretended to be mad and continued to drone on and on about ungrateful brats ripping him off. I nodded and hugged him tightly, cutting him off and smiled when I could feel his face heating up.

       Who am I kidding? I want to be able to see, so that I can stop being a burden to him.

       To repay him for his overflowing kindness. Even though a tiny part of me felt rather wistful. Did this mean that I was supposed to leave him and start living only on own independently? I shrugged it off, because I thought that it's about time for him to live a better life.A life such a kind soul like him rightfully deserves,and to stop being so selfless. He always put others before himself. Maybe it's time for him to think about himself. Which I highly doubt he would ever do so.

       This time, I want to be the one to take care of him.

       " You owe me a lifetime supply of coffee/bubble tea/beef!!!! (it changes according to his cravings at the moment)" He would always grumble when he started feeling the strain on his body due to fatigue after helping out anyone who needed his help.

        Be it taking over Kyungsoo oppa's late night shift deejaying despite feeling so tired.

        Or staying up with Chanyeol oppa eating ice-cream while listening to him crying and whining over his relationship problems at 3 in the morning.

        Or calling Kai's mother to assure her that he would look after him when Kai ran away from home due to constant heated arguments with his dad and big brother.

        Or staying up with me the whole night trying to teach me how to solve some quadratic equations.

        Or just serenading me to sleep when I had nightmares. The list is endless.

        Before I found out about the truth behind his clumsiness, Baekhyun oppa mentioned that he had some difficulty in walking, "Myopanties? Myo...myo...patty..? I don't remember." He would trail off, scratching his head and forget about me even asking him about his leg's condition in the first place. It's actually Myopathy, Sister Marie told me when I asked her about it one day, a muscle deficiency decease. It caused Baekhyun oppa's leg muscles to be weak. He never elaborated on it and I only kept quiet, afraid that it would remind him of some bad memories and cut open his old wounds. But at that moment, I was determined to be the one to look after him after all that he had done for me.

        I might be blind, but I didn't need him to tell me how much he wanted to be a singer to know that. It was an unspoken fact that everyone around him knew but never brought it up. I have endlessly wondered why nobody ever encouraged him to go chase after his dreams because he is undeniably and indescribably talented, not to forget, immensely passionate when It came to music. But I know I never did because I was scared. I was so afraid that he would leave me behind when he becomes a star. A star shining so bright that I who lived in the darkness could never reach him.

       Unreachable. Untouchable. To the point that he goes so far away, that he becomes unreal.

       That thought, by itself, made a small part within me die a little.

       I am not like Baekhyun oppa who is selfless, I am a selfish person. I hate myself for that, for thinking I deserve him for myself because I have already lost so much. Just like a parasite, I leeched onto him and never let him go.

       But if I can see, this time, I will be the one guiding him to where he should be.

       To a huge and spacious stage, a grand piano in the heart of the stage, and he, under the single spotlight. 

       He definitely deserves better. A better future. A better me.

       "Baekhyun oppa," I pulled away from his warmth, feeling a sense of loss, but I swallowed down my disappointment and mustered up all my courage. I could feel him shiver.If I was not mistaken, he winced a little bit and took a deep breath.

       "I am ready." I smiled a little.

       Even though I wasn't ready to let him go. The thought of seeing how my saviour and my light looks like made my heart skip.