September 4th, 2012

Dear Ilji,

  This morning was a little odd, actually just a little unexpected. It started off normal. After what happened last night I woke up with swollen eyes but my daddy still kissed my forehead and sent me off to the bathroom. This morning I had to shower quickly because I didn't get a chance to last night. When I was dressed I went into the kitchen to stare at the breakfast my daddy prepared. He made me oatmeal and fresh fruit; I hate oatmeal. So again I had to drink the nasty Pediasure. Both me and my daddy expected to be ignored by my dad like always but this morning he walked up to us by the counter dressed in his work clothes and a frown plastered on his face.

    "Look Jongin it's too early to be arguing," my daddy sighed while closing the lid on my lunch case. My dad only stared as my daddy put the lunch cases into my bag before saying something. I don't remember what he said exactly but I do know he wants me and my daddy dressed up by 7 pm because his job was holding a family dinner and we had to go. He said it will look good for his image since he works at a family company. Ironic right?

 My dad is planning to get a promotion. When I overhear him talking to his co-workers he gets really excited about it. It's probably the only time I hear him happy. I think he gets excited because that means he can get more grown up juice. My daddy tried to decline the demand my dad wanted because he had to work late again but my dad said we were going and that was final. He left after that.  It's almost time for me to leave so I will write in you later Ilji.

" So you're telling me Jongin expects you and Jun Min to go to his companies dinner after all the nonsense he's done?" Baekhyun asks as he's rocking Chang Seo back and forth back to sleep. What Jongin told Kyungsoo is the first thing that Kyungsoo mentions when he meets up with Baekhyun and the kids.

" Yeah it's not that big of a deal. It's just a dinner," Kyungsoo replies while fixing the hat Jun Min is wearing.  Jun Min and Hyun Seo are quietly waiting for their daddies to finish their conversation. 

"It is a big deal. He only wants to you and Jun Min for some company thing? I don't think so you need to ditch him,"

"The kids can't be late for the bus bye Baekhyun," Kyungsoo waves the latter goodbye. Jun Min and Hyun Seo gave Baekhyun a hug and kiss before grabbing Kyungsoo's hand. Soon enough they are making their way to he bus stop leaving Baekhyun at the end of the street shaking his head. Kyungsoo is doing it again, he's being naïve.

Do you want to go to the dinner?

Hyun Seo and Jun Min are seated at the middle of the bus behind an old man who keeps complaining about his deadbeat son. Hyun Seo had grabbed Jun Min's day bag and pulled out his blue notepad.

Not really but it's a dinner it shouldn't be that bad.

What if they want you to talk?

Jun Min hadn't thought about that possibility. What if they wanted him to talk? Would his dad be upset if he didn't talk? Would his daddy come up with an excuse if the topic came up? Jun Min was never a positive thinker. He felt the anxiety course through his body as he thought of a reply. Which did not want to come.

I won't think about it too much. I'm sure everything will turn out fine.

The boys stopped writing and sat in silence before going their seperate ways to class. Jun Min had  a long day ahead of him.

Dear Ilji,

  Today was a little boring. I didn't have the same classes like yesterday. Today I had more electives and I even got a chance to practice the piano. I played Moonlight Sonata and my teacher says I'm improving a lot (because honestly I when I first started piano in the first quarter) so I was happy. Oh yeah something interesting did happen. I had gym today with Ms. Jung's sister and coach Bang and the two gym teachers thought it'd be nice if we all played soccer. It was all going good until Jin Mi kicked the ball a little too hard. The ball smacked Jimae square in the face and she was screaming. I know I always say that I hate her but I really felt bad when she got hit. She was bleeding.

   When the kids and coaches gathered around her in shock there was blood streaming from her nose. Coach Bang pressed tissues against her nose and asked for a volunteer to take her to the nurse. I volunteered because I knew how to get to the nurses office quickly. He agreed and told me to take good care of Jimae. I held Jimae's hand the whole time while we walked to the nurse. She was still sniffling and crying but she would not tilt her head back like a smart person. The blood just kept gushing while she panicked and cried even more, I was completely grossed out. More than once I had to physically tilt her head back keep it there so the blood would stop. We got to the nurses office in three minutes, the nurses office is on the opposite side of the field.

   You are probably wondering how we got to the nurse so quickly. Truth is, I'm at the nurse a lot. I'm there so much that the smell of saline stays on my skin hours after leaving the office. No I'm not a sickly child Ilji, I have to go there to drink my Pediasure during lunch (only sometimes) and I also go there a lot because I get really bad head aches. The nurse calls them migraines.

  When Jimae and I entered the nurses office it was really cold. Ms. Choi believed in air conditioning even in the fall. The nurse was putting an icepack on some kid's swollen eye. She turned around with a concerned look which turned into an appaled one when she saw Jimae.

"You were just here yesterday," She said before leading Jimae to the bathroom. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to leave or not until Ms. Choi told me to sit down. She only made me stay because I had to drink my Pediasure since I skipped it for a week. She threatened to call my daddy if I didn't drink it, so I had to drink the nasty drink.

When I finished the drink Jimae was also better. The nurse put a hello kitty band aid on her nose which was unecessary but I didn't care. After that whole thing nothing else really happened. I'm at uncle Baekhyun's house now doing my homework waiting for my daddy to pick me up. See you later Ilji I will write in you later.

     Kyungsoo came to pick Jun Min up around 6 o' clock. Jun Min and Hyun Seo had just laid down for their nap when he came. When Baekhyun wakes Jun Min up Jun Min is a little grumpy. He gets all his things together with a pout and even whines while putting on his shoes. Kyungsoo wants to laugh because his son is adorable but that would make Jun Min even more grumpy.  Kyungsoo is holding Chang Seo in his arms when Jun Min walks up to him with his panda hoodie covering his eyes.

"Awww is my baby sleepy?" Kyungsoo smiles and Jun Min silently nods his head. He wants to nap really badly. He didn't want to go to the dinner at all. "You can sleep in the car okay?" Jun Min nods again and holds his arms out because he wants to be picked up. He doesn't care if he's 7 he's tired. Baekhyun picks up Jun Min instead and starts blowing on his belly, making Jun Min erupt in laughter and soft whines.

"Are you awake now?" Baekhyun giggles as he continues to tickle Jun Min. He stops when Jun Min looks like he's about to pass out from laughing too hard. Jun Min rests his head on Baekhyun's shoulder and closes his eyes again. Kyungsoo gets up with Chang Seo still in his hands. They had to get home and get ready before Jongin came to get them.

"Alright Baekhyun let me trade you your baby for my baby," Kyungsoo says. Baekhyun laughs as they make the trade. Jun Min is now leaning on Kyungsoo's shoulder in a daze while Chang Seo is making all types of screeching noises in Baekhyun's arms. "See you tomorrow," Kyungsoo chimes as he grabs Jun Min's bag with his free hand. He's grateful that Jun Min is really light or else he'd be struggling. When Jun Min and Kyungsoo exit the house Baekhyun is leaning on the door frame.

"Kyungsoo you don't have to go you know. You could stay here and have dinner, " Baekhyun says but Kyungsoo waves him off. "Fine, but I want you to call me when it's over alright? I swear if Jongin does something stupid I'm going to stab needles into him."

"Alright Baekhyun bye," Kyungsoo is walking down the street as he ignores everything that Baekhyun said. Jun Min gives a weak wave before laying his head back on his daddy's shoulder. He might have been rocking back and forth but it was soothing for him.

Dear Ilji,

  Did I ever tell you how much I hate dressing up? If haven't well now you know. I'm still extremely tired but I managed to stay awake during the second shower I had to take today. I smell like baby now because my dad insists on using some dumb baby lotion I hate. Since this whole dinner is semi formal I'm wearing some buttoned down striped shirt that's tucked into my black dress pants. My hair is growing a little long so my daddy combed my bangs to the side with gel, I hate that stuff and I hate the comb it hurts. The dress shoes I have to wear usually hurt my feet an hour after wearing them. My dad hasn't gotten here yet and my daddy is getting dressed. He usually looks really handsome when dressing up so I'm looking forward to see how he looks. Talk to you later Ilji.

Jun Min and Kyungsoo are ready by 6:45 and Jongin comes in at exactly 7 like he said. He ordered Kyungsoo and Jun Min to wait in his car while he quickly got re-dressed. 

"Jun Min are you taking your journal with you? Or your notepad? You are going to need someone to talk to," Kyungsoo holds out the two objects. Jun Min only grabs Ilji and leaves the note pad. He didn't want to talk to the other kids at the dinner, he only wanted to talk to Ilji. Kyungsoo put the notepad on the lamp stand in the living room before getting out his and Jun Min's night jackets. They put on their shoes and got inside Jongin's car, both in the back seat. Kyungsoo never knew when Jongin didn't mind him sitting in the front seat or not. Sometimes he did but most times he didn't. Today Kyungsoo played it safe and stayed with his son in the back.

"Can you promise me that you will try to talk to some of the kids? It'd be nice," Kyungsoo holds out his pinky finger. Jun Min contemplates before locking his pinky finger with his daddy. If it would make his daddy happy Jun Min would do it. With a small smile Kyungsoo buckled Jun Min's seat belt though Jun Min wanted to argue that he can do it all by himself. Jongin came out five minutes later and slipped into the car. 

"What the hell are you doing in the back seat. Get in the front," Jongin growls as he grips the steering wheel. He needs a lot of patience for Kyungsoo if he wants to get through a whole car ride with the man. Kyungsoo apologizes before going to the front seat. When the door to the passengers side was close Jongin reversed his car onto their street and the Kim family made their way to the dinner.

On the drive to the dinner Kyungsoo notices  a flask in the cup holder. He wonders if Jongin drank from it already but seeing how Jongin isn't spewing drunken venom and is extremely quiet he dismisses the thought. Jongin isn't drunk...well atleast not yet.

 Dear Ilji,

I really want to go home. I'm extremely tired and it's past my bed time. The glass clock on the wooden wall reads 9:30. My bed time is at 8:30. The dinner is finished but the adults are conversing over grown up juice. When we first came to the dinner my dad wrapped one arm around my daddy and held my hand. His hands were freezing cold and I felt really uncomfortable. He told us to act like we actually liked each other or we'd suffer the consequences, whatever that means. The first person to greet us was some panda looking guy who was my dad's boss. He looked more like a panda than my uncle Tao. I didn't know that was possible. He shook hands with both my dad's and held his hand out for me to high five. I looked at him for a couple of seconds before smacking his hand. Mr. Panda (that's what I'm calling him) said I was a real man because I examined my acquaintances before trusting them, whatever that means. He also called me cute.

  After that my dad immediately left us to go talk with his boss. I held on my dad's hand while we looked for a seat at the huge dinner table. We chose the seats next to my dad so his image could continue to look good. He would have ruined it if we chose to sit somewhere else. There was so much food on the table. Food that I was sure I wouldn't like. My daddy told me he had a pack of gummy bears waiting for me in my bag if I ate some of the food and drank a Pediasure. I agreed and ate some of the food on the plate my daddy made for me, it wasn't that bad. But the gummy bears were better.

There are a lot of kids at the dinner. A lot of people here have three kids each. I think the only people who has one child was my parents and Mr. Panda. His daughter Seo Mi is really annoying and loud like him. The other kids are just as bad. All of them kept screaming and running around when we all finished eating. I tried to stay under my daddy but he told me to go play while the adults talked. He was having some grown up argument with some lady. It was getting pretty heated when my daddy raised his voice an octive to counter argue.

I tried to go through with my dad's promise and talk to the kids but I forgot my note pad. One kid named Jin Hyuk stared at me for a long time before asking if I talked. I shook my head and he asked me why and I shrugged my shoulders. I couldn't tell him that I hadn't talked in five years. Really I couldn't. Jin Hyuk left me to play with the other kids and honestly I was so happy. That kid had snot dripping from his nose and tried to scheme on my gummy bears. That's a no-no. 

Right now the kids have all settled in a circle minus these twins that are play fighting on the floor. I'm included in the circle even though I'm writing in you. All they're doing is talking about something they did with their parents, mostly their dad's. Multiple times they tried to ask me questions but I ignored them until Jin Hyuk said I didn't talk. I would have gave him a gummy bear as a reward for helping me out but then all these other kids would want some.

The adults are getting up I think it's time for us to leave! Yay, I will write in you later Ilji

Jun Min closed his journal and waited for his daddy. Right next to Jun Min is Seo Mi who started touching his journal for no reason. Jun Min pulled it away from her and glared at her. She glared back at him before pouting. Jun Min felt himself being lifted and he expected it to be his daddy but it was his dad. Jun Min is terrified as he stares at his dad with wide eyes. Mr. Panda picks up his daughter before facing Jongin.

"Kids are something right Jongin?" Mr. Panda cracks a smile.

"They sure are sir but you gotta love them," Jongin smiles and tries to ruffle Jun Min's hair but Jun Min lets out a whine while trying to kick his way out of his dad's arms, Jongin is caught off guard. Multiple times he tried to calm Jun Min down but Jun Min kept squirming and whining. Kyungsoo came just in time and snatched Jun Min out of Jongin's arms.

"Sorry he's a little restless. It's way past his bed time but he loves his dad right Jun Min?" Kyungsoo smiles. Jun Min lightly nods and he feels his back being patted.

"I understand completely. It's past Seo Mi's bedtime and she usually bites me when she's cranky. It was wonderful meeting your family Jongin, they are wonderful and I can see why you love them so much. I see great things in your future," Mr. Panda hugs Jongin before leaving with Seo Mi. Kyungsoo is too busy rubbing Jun Min's back to notice the glare Jongin has when he looks at Jun Min.

As the family drives back home Jun Min pays close attention to the way his dad gulps down the liquid from the silver flask. 

"Jongin you shouldn't be--"

"Shut up," Jongin cuts off Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo listens and gulps down what he is about to say. This is not going to end well and both Kyungsoo and Jun Min know this when Jongin takes another gulp. In the rear view mirror Jun Min is sure he can see his dad's eyes begin to glow red. Jun Min is terrified.

When they get home Jongin harshly tells them to get out of the car. Kyungsoo grabs Jun Min's travel bag and picks Jun Min up. Jun Min holds onto Kyungsoo's shoulder tightly because he thinks his dad is going to do something really mean. Kyungsoo takes off Jun Min's dress shoes and tells him to change into his pajamas quickly but Jongin comes in.

"You" Jongin points at Jun Min. Jun feels his heart drop when his dad notions his finger to come closer. Jun Min knows he will get in more trouble if he disobey's his dad. Jun Min walks slowly but Kyungsoo grabs Jun Min.

"Jongin stop he--"

"I told you to shutup," Jongin raises his voice making Kyungsoo and Jun Min cringe. " Now I told you to come here didn't I?" Jongin asks. It's a rhetorical question but Jun Min knows he has to continue to walk even though he doesn't want to. Jun Min's heart stops completely along with his breathing when he stops in front of his dad. He forgot his dad is tall and intimidating and much more scarier when angry. Jun Min can see the devil horns stick out from his dad's toasted brown hair as his eyes glow red again. The air is tense for 15 seconds as Jun Min waits to see what his had is going to do.

The next thing that happened is something that Jun Min didn't expect to happen. His dad's hand came in contact with his cheek and he finds himself on the floor screaming. His face stings as the tears roll down his cheeks rapidly. He had never been hit before and he's never been slapped so hard across the face. Kyungsoo watches in pure horror as his baby is screaming to the top of his lungs with his hand covering his face. Kyungsoo is so angry but he also wants to cry because he let this happen.

"Jongin what the hell!" Kyungsoo screams as he runs to Jun Min. 

"He almost ruined my chances of a promotion that little bastard! It's all your damn fault!" Jongin screams at Kyungsoo. Jun Min is still screaming while Kyungsoo attempts to calm him by rubbing his back. "Shut up you stupid child!"

"Don't talk to him like that! We all know why you want a promotion...it's so you can kill yourself with more alcohol you sick bastard," Kyungsoo spews. It's rare for him to curse.

"Atleast I'm only drinking and not sleeping around with people like someone I know, ing ," Jongin barks and that hits Kyungsoo hard. The tears started falling and he couldn't stop them. Of all the things Jongin could have said he chose those words. Those sick gut churning words. Kyungsoo is choked up as he tries to think of something to say but nothing came out, only pained sobs that are clouded by Jun Min's screaming. "I don't have time for this . You're both worthless and you can both go to hell," Jongin turns and slams the door, making his way to one of the night bars to ignite the fuels of his frustrations. Kyungsoo and Jun Min are left on the floor still crying. Jun Min isn't screaming anymore but his face is buried in his daddy's chest as he wishes for his dad to die in his head.

Done with Chapter 2. Sorry it's been awhile right? I think the last time I updated was around December. But here's the second chapter. I'm going to try and update frequently because really I shouldn't be so delayed with updating this. I literally have the story line written out I just have to copy it and re write it.

Please if you don't mind comment I love reading comments so much

Have a great night/day ^^