forty eight.

lather, rinse, repeat

I thought that it’d be a good idea to move in with Daehyun.

But I was wrong. So very much wrong.

“Nope,” I hissed, picking up the suitcase I’d carried up the steps from the elevator, “I’m not staying here.”

Daehyun was quick to stop in my path though, holding up his arms and successfully blocking my way. He knew too well I wouldn’t dare knock him over on my way out. “What, but why?” He was whining, as per usual, bottom lip puckered out and already wide eyes throw even bigger at me. “You said you’d live with me.”

But that had been before I’d known that he was rolling in cash. There was no way I could afford to pay even a quarter the lent fees required for the room I would take up, never mind paying a split half. I should have expected something of the sort when Daehyun had led me toward the fancy apartment complex.

“Please Youngjae?” His arms had wrapped around my waist now, already having stolen my suit case and tossed it in some corner of the apartment, away from my immediate reach. “I even decorated your room for you. The least you can do is take a peek.”

I wasn’t allowed to say no.

He dragged me away into a room he’d supposedly prepared, making sure to cover my eyes before kicking open the door with his foot, releasing me with an excited “tadah!”

And it took all I had not to drop on the spot.

“Wh-what is this?”

“Books!”

I knew that much.

The room was perfect, stocked high with the very home-library I’d been dreaming of since I’d begun reading. I suppose I had mentioned once or twice to Jaebum while Daehyun had been present – seeing as the two used to be all but glued at the waist – but I hadn’t expected anyone to be listening. I was, at the time, just stupid, plan-old Youngjae, after all.

My immediate reaction was to stumble into the room, running a finger over the fresh spines of the books in awe. Books, hundreds of them, stocked high and low. Just for me.

“You didn’t.” I mumbled, still too enthralled with the papers than I was attentive of Daehyun following my every move, “I can’t believe you.” Just how much could doing this have cost?

And that hadn’t been even half of what Daehyun had done to the room.

The walls were decked in beige wallpaper, decorated here and there with black and white photographs. Artsy, but not to the extent of going overboard. Instead of studying, Daehyun should have tried out to be an interior designer.

His eyes were on me the whole time as I moved around the room, bright and eager like a little child waiting to be praised. “Do you like it?”

Did I like it? I loved it.

But I couldn’t have it.

“Remember when I told you the reason why I’m moving out of Yongguk and Himchan’s place?” Actually, I’d yet to tell him the reason why:  that I felt like a burden. But I decided to let that slip, crossing my arms across my chest. “No, Daehyun. I can’t pay for all of this.”

“But you don’t have to! Imagine it like a present, from me to you.”

There was no way presents were this large and flashy in shape and form.

I’d opened my mouth to state this, but Daehyun was quick to stop me, shaking his head. “My family always makes flashy gifts like this. Actually, this is pretty dull in comparison. Come on, please?”

It was far too obvious his family was not of this country. Of this world to be frank.

“No means no.”

“Then how about this?” He was quick to propose, grabbing my hand and tugging me into my supposedly new bed, “You become my housewife. You know, like how I was when I lived with you guys. It’s the vacation anyways. You don’t have any classes, but I still have cram school.”

It sounded logical enough. I suppose.

“Fine, but I’m still paying everything I can.”

Not that it’d even leave a dent in the fee I was supposed to pay him. It wasn’t fair, why did Daehyun have to be rolling in cash?

Much to my displease, the deal was then set and before I had a chance to change my mind, Daehyun had already brought my bags in, calling Himchan to tell him the ‘exciting news’. (It was anything but exciting in my opinion.)

I wasn’t sure what exactly it was that I’d apparently put myself in.

I must have been the biggest idiot in the world.

“Yes mom, I’m perfectly fine.”

With a house this big, I had been positive the majority of my life would have been spent dedicated to sweeping and cleaning the place. It was either the house was dust proof, or Daehyun had set me up and hired a maid for when I was out at my part time job at the book store. This left me plenty of enough time to make my daily calls to Himchan in the morning and laze around the living room.

“Hyung, you don’t have to worry about me, I’m eating just fine.”

That wasn’t too big of a lie. Dinner was directly at six when Daehyun returned from cram school, but that was just about all I ate. Having too much time on my hands, I found myself dropping back to the habit of counting my calories. But at least I ate. At least I wasn’t consulting directly the toilet bowl – as Himchan had rudely snapped at me when Daehyun had spilled (accidentally, he says) my past habits.

“I have to go, alright? Yes to the restroom, but to wash up. Stop babying me.”

Himchan thought he’d had me all figured out.

“Alright, I’ll call you tomorrow morning. Bye. Hyung, stop talking, I’m going to hang up on you.”

Rude as it was, hanging up on him was the only possible way to end the call. He’d rat at me for it tomorrow morning, but it was that, or get the ‘I’m-disappointed-in-you’ look from the manager.

At least Himchan couldn’t give me weird looks through the phone.

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soy_latte
#1
Chapter 52: I was so surprised when I reached the end! I was so eager to read the next chapter and bam. The end.
Wow but you actually took time to write about the whole back stories it's nice, thank you.
I enjoyed reading this story.
soy_latte
#2
Chapter 38: It's adorable, only one is missing from that cute friend-fam :)
AquaMarina
#3
Chapter 53: Wow this is a really fantastic story! The way it was written was so personal, touching and heartbreaking. I really felt Youngjae' anxiety and issues throughout the story. I like how you've left some parts of the plot ambiguous and up to our interpretation, I think it makes the story all the more interesting and definitely leads a food for thought
Thank you for writing such a beautiful fic!
yeolaf #4
Chapter 53: what....... this is so beautiful :(
why i just found this now :(
daehyun life really a mess more than youngjae life but theres he always beside youngjae really hope youngjae will ready for dae~
and poor baby jongup :( how can he be so angel

i really like your plot and how you conected the caracters ~
thanks for writing this one of best fanfic i ever read hehehe~
LoveBabyCass #5
Chapter 53: Nooh i need DaeJae and BangHim to happen! How could u do this to me?! Hmp! (I still like u a lot tho but i'm taking back what i initially thought of giving u chocolates! Haha!)
chonyallie
#6
((and sorry if i just read it like 2 years after this fic was completed! i'm glad i found this amazing fic, honestly.))
chonyallie
#7
THIS IS SO BEAUTIFULLY WRITTEN MY HEART LITERALLY CANT TAKE IT.
i really want to hug the self-struggling youngjae and thank god daehyun's there to force him to eat--even though he'll throw it up later. i know jaebum is actually a good person but i cant help hating him when he shows up after a major interaction between daejae. HAHA
aND HIMCHAN. da best sidekick, literally. i want to have an older brother like himchan, but well, i have my own older brother irl.
jongup, poor jongup. it's not actually daehyun's fault as it's actually daehyun's fault. HAHA you get me? anyways, daehyun doesn't kill him and i hope he doesn't blame it on himself more about it.
but overall i really love how you write youngjae's feelings, how he feels so hideous and those angst-suicidal things youngjae's feeling, and then his development with daehyun's help, to become a less insecure youngjae even though he still is. i love your choice of words on those beauty, health, and pretty kind of stuffs and the one sided thing youngjae has with jaebum-- i really love this story in general.

*i just need another extra, seriously. i need to read them when youngjae is finally ready, and daehyun is there to hold him for real, and they'll be in each other's arms for forever. AAAH I NEED IT.

ps actually when i just reached 10+ chapters i was still thinking that i was reading about got7's youngjae. OMG. and then daehyun went out and i'll be like. what. HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH. but daejae is one of my ultimate ships too, so--.
thanks for writing this whole beautiful and inspiring piece, and have a wonderful week! <3 sorry for the long comment.
DaeJaeLover
#8
Chapter 53: Although I didn't like how little of himself Youngjae was thinking and and what he made himself to go through, I still really liked how you wrote this fanfiction, the development of the story and its characters and bromance(s)!
And I know I'm very late. It's just... Although I had your story in my list for a really long time, I found time to read it only yesterday, but I got so into the story that I finished it in less than 2 days ^-^
P.S. I had to delete and repost my previous comment edited, because I saw the links the moment I opened the story in my computer. I don't know if you saw it or not before I deleted it, but I'm still sorry if I bothered you.
jiroyayoi
#9
Chapter 51: i love the bromance feel, no y , just mild kiss and the your choice of diction is beautiful.
This is so good after some hours reading much M rated daejae ;w;

and I never thought dae approached jae for himchan. they had little moment but im curious how it would turn out.
I'm gonna read your other works (:
mizotasu
#10
Chapter 53: I must be honest, I was a little surprised at the way you wrote this story. Your characters were written so well and every flaw or habbit which you wrote about without explanation of what secrets it kept made me think deeply of an answer. The story was so catchy and it got my attention so intense and deep, I just had to read it all in one go. (Although it's 2am now and I have to wake at 6:30) I could already tell from the start Jaebum was suddenly going to get interested with YJ just because of Daehyun. Since bap's lawsuit, it's been Daehyun all the while who surprised me the most of how strong he is and works towards his dream while (i don't want to sound insulting) Youngjae is probably searching for support and comfort with his mist trusting persons, who probably one of them is his brother. Thank you for this! This might sound weird but your story made me think a bit of how important it is to stay strong and believe in yourself. I'm actually a pretty smiley girl while going through ty stuff and health which is dropping to a zero, but still smiling as if being proud of a non existent thing. While a friend of mine is going through something I went through when I was young, and it's practically breaking him, I feel sorry for him, but I wish I could give him some of my strength of keeping up. Welp sorry for my long comment. Long story short; your story moved me, and there's no need to feel insecurities if you ever had some because your writing is really great ^-^