6/15/XX

 

It is a long way back to Dad’s hometown. Junsu’s hometown. Last week, school year has ended. I’m free from hell! But I’m going to be stuck with my duck cousin for a month. Why dad must refresh his mind every summer?

 

Flashback:

 

“Yunho-hyung!” Junsu squealed when he saw his cousin coming out from the car. Yunho was about to approach him when a little girl snacked him away.

“Junsu-oppa. Jiji missed you!” the little girl bluffed making the bubbly man ‘awww’.

“Why baby Ji-Hye? We always talk at phone right?” he pinched her cheeks. Ji-Hye slapped his cousin’s and smiled.

“I’m missing oppa’s big . I can totally use it as my pillow.” Junsu frowned. Yunho looked at the both of them, laughing. He went near the two, trying to suppress his laughter.

“That’s weird, princess Ji. You do only love Junsu’s ?” he asked while pulling out one of the earphones from his ears. The little girl cutely nodded, making Yunho laugh even more.

“Humiliated!” Yunho pointed out Junsu. “That’s kinda harsh for a guy, you know?”

The bubbly man knitted his eyebrows together and pouts. “You know that I’m not straight so please?”

 

“Oppa~!!! Unni~!!!” Junsu’s mom sang out.

“Dongsaeng-aaah~” Yunho’s mom ran out like a freak and hugged Mrs. Kim in an instant. The husband of them looked at each other and scratched their head.

“As if they we’re still teenagers.” Junsu’s dad mumbled.

“You bet.” Mr. Jung answered.

“Ahjussi.” Yunho and Ji-Hye murmured before they bow down to their uncle. Junsu does the same for Yunho’s dad. The older men walked up to their son and laugh.

“Kids are getting taller these days. We’re really getting old!” Mr. Jung cracked.

“Oppa! Unni! Have you eaten?” Mrs. Kim asked. Yunho’s dad rolled his eyes before he looked at to her.

“No we don’t. Won’t you want us to eat?”

“Aniyo.” Junsu’s mom said dismissively. “C’mon Unni, help me to prepare the foods.” She left dragging Yunho’s mom forcefully.

 

Mr. Jung huffed. “I hope my little sister doesn’t act much nosy than your kids.”

Junsu’s dad chuckled, looking at his son who happily chatting with Yunho and Ji-Hye. “Junsu. They are both the same, so I have no worries at all. I guess Junsu was created by God to be a girl but he ran out of time.”

 “There’s nothing wrong about Junsu being homoual isn’t? We will not love him less. Don’t worry my dear brother in law; my children’s services are always free.” Mr. Jung taps his brother in law’s back and smiled. “Cheer up. We’re living in freedom so take away those ty worries of yours. Who will not love that cheery son of yours? He brings up the smile to everyone. Stop being so lousy dramatic here.”

Yunho’s dad ruffled Mr. Kim’s hair. “Where’s Junho anyway?”

Junsu’s dad shrugged his hyung’s hand away from him and fixed his hair. “He have date.” He muttered. “I wonder when Junsu will find his love.”

“Yeobonim! Oppa~! Dinner is readdyyyy ~!”

 

 

Junsu walked out from with Yunho after they’ve eat their lunch. Yunho missed this. Although he hates the fact that every summer they have to go here, he still loves this place.

“How was Heechul-hyung?” Yunho snorted.

“Heechul-hyung?” Junsu asked priceless, mouth forming an ‘O’. “He’s doing fine… I guess?” he answered unsurely. They’ve stopped to a big tree in front of them. They were already here. “He’s hangs out with Hangeng-hyung most of the time.”

Yunho nod and dropped himself in the ground, staring at the peaceful sea of clouds. Junsu cling closer to him and smile widely. “Hyung, have you met BoA noona’s dongsaeng?”

The older man looked at him. “The busy guy you mean?” he asked and Junsu wiggly nod.

Yunho shook his head. “For the past 4 years you’re telling that I will meet him soon, where is he now?”

“That guy is so damn busy with his activities.” Junsu whined. “I don’t even find his activities enjoyable. I love God too but he was just…too much?”

“Yah. That’s mean Junsu. Let him be. “ Yunho murmured sweetly. “I guess he will have a free time soon, right?”

“Next month or probably next year.” Junsu groaned making Yunho whacked his forehead and mouthed ‘pabo’.

 

“Junsu! Yunho!” the teens looked back as they saw a female running like freak and panting with a smile. When she settled herself in front of them, she heavily dropped herself to the ground lean back to the tree.

“I am so tired!”

“Yah, noona! Where the hell is Jae?”

“I don’t know!” she shrieked. “You know that guy is always busy. He seems to love everyone except us.”

Yunho chuckled before a thought passes his mind. “Uhh. Where’s Heechul-hyung? And Hangeng-hyung?”

The two looked at each other, eyes are quarrelling if they should tell him or not.

“Uhhh…they’re on town? I guess?” Junsu unsurely answered. BoA pinched him behind and smiled as she nodded.

“Wait. So this is how the town looks like Hannie?” a voice mocked them.

Smile creep in Yunho’s face as he recognized the owner of that voice, Heechul. As they approached closer, Yunho didn’t notice the hand that was tangling along with Heechul’s hand.

“I saw Jae at the town, what is he doing there?” Hangeng asked. The man he was holding to, looked at him with annoyed eyes and Hangeng’s mouth form an ‘O’. “Yea, he was on his daily routine about loving the community. I get it.”

BoA sighed. “You got it right. Actually I’m here to break a bad news.”

Everyone’s eyes drew on her as she saddened. “How bad is your bad news?” Junsu asked.

“Really bad I guess?”

Hangeng mumbled. “Tell us.”

“I got promoted.”

“WHAT?” Heechul shrieked. “This is good news for god sake. What are you thinking?”

“Could you please let me continue, oppa? You are so exaggerated and I’m still not done explaining.” BoA groaned, annoyingly. “This is not good news because I need to move out in this country. I’m being promoted but I have to work at US.”

No one dare to talk. They don’t know what to tell. “…and the worst, I don’t know how I will break it to Jae. If I leave who’s going to take care of him? That kid is useless.”

“Liar. He knows how to cook unlike you.” Heechul accused.

“Shut up, oppa! I’m being serious here.” BoA scowled.

“Sure darling.” The man smiled to annoy her even more.

“Don’t worry about it noona.” Junsu comforted. “I’ll talk to my parents about taking care of him. They will surely agree with this.”

“I got the same problem too.” Hangeng whispered.

Instead of hearing his explanation, Heechul knuckled Hangeng’s forehead and frown. “How come you have the same problem? You don’t even have a brother or sister!”

Hangeng winced in pain and the rest of the clan laughed. “Don’t be so stupid, Chullie. That’s why you are always getting the wrong impressions; you won’t let us continue what we are saying. I am going to say that I also needed to go overseas. Dad wants me to take over his business. Aish!”

“Yaaah! How come the two of you are going to leave me? You guys are so mean!” the oldest one hurtfully said. Hangeng and BoA looked at each other and laugh.

“Omo. We’re going to leave the old hag.” They both said. Heechul’s eye fiercer when he heard the word ‘old hag’.

When the two saw the mad eyes of Heechul, they both gulped and dazed to each other. “We’re both dead.”

Hangeng pulled BoA and run. “Kaja BoA or else we’ll gonna die!”

“Yah! Come back here.” Heechul run and followed them leaving the two kids can’t stop laughing about their actions.

Yunho is mesmerized in the smile that Heechul was emitting. Unknown to him, all of them are hiding a secret that will break his heart, that Heechul already found his love.

 

The night fell and as usual, Yunho and Junsu are going to share the same room since Yunho stated that ‘I’m more comfortable with Junsu than Junho. Peace men.’.

“Junsu-ah.” Yunho happily mumbled. His cousin who’s about to throw himself in the bed, stopped and looked at to his hyung whose busy looking at the pictures that he took just this afternoon. “Why?”

“Heechul-hyung is getting more beautiful. I can’t stop myself from liking him.” The older one smiled like a fool. Junsu looked at him with pity before he settled down himself in the edge of his bed. The way his hyung smiles, he don’t know if he’s going to tell it or not.

“Hyung…”

“Why?” Yunho groaned, not taking away his eyes in the camera.

“He’s not like the s that you can get fling with in the city. He’s different.”

Yunho widened. “I never think of him like that Su.”

Junsu sighed. “What if…” he paused. Yunho finally looked away from his camera, to await Junsu’s next word.

“…What if Heechul-hyung already found his love?”

 

End f/b

 

 

(Changmin’s POV)

So the is here. This is the tomorrow that I’m thinking of, tomorrow where Yunho is out of nowhere. This is the worst. Just this morning, I received a SMS from Karam telling not to pick him up because Imo(auntie) is going to take him to school. Lazy enough, I go ride a bus instead bringing my car. I don’t feel like driving anyway. I dropped down in the first street since I like to take a walked in going school. It happened that I’ve passed by the Bul Pae Café. Suddenly I recall memories between Yunho-hyung and Jaejoong-hyung… Hyung, did you see Jaejoong-hyung? He was distressed.

 

The moment I’ve stepped inside the school’s premises, disappointment in everyone’s eyes landed on me. They felt sorry, I guess. I sighed. As if everyone is affected.

“Changmin-hyung!” I heard someone shouted. I looked afar and saw Jino approaching me. I nod as a signal that I’ve heard him. He bowed at me before he asked.

“How was Yunho-sunbae?”

“Not good.” Is the only words that I can say.

 

(3^rd pov)

 

Changmin left Jino. He wanted to be alone. His eyes are looking everywhere, finding the apparitions of Yoochun, Junsu and Karam. He walked a little and saw two figures sitting in the bench and it look like they carrying the world within them. He sat next to them and hung his head low.

“Where’s Karam?” Yoochun asked. Changmin just shrugged his shoulder.

They stay silent. Everyone who passed them, giving pity on how they look. Junsu slowly reached for Yoochun’s shoulder and rest his head. Tears rushed out from his eyes, and the man beside him is trying to wipe every drop away.

‘No naughty figure. What do I expect? Everything is different.’ Changmin thought.

Everything is so new to them. Without Yunho, it feels like the world is dead. No happy figure to hang out with Yoochun and Changmin. No stupid cousin of Junsu. No bestfriend of Jaejoong. All of them thinking that they are having hard time accepting the harsh reality but how about Jaejoong? How can Jaejoong managed his sanity from falling down? Changmin looked at his Junsu-hyung and saw his mourn. He heaved a sigh. ‘This is madness.’  But foremost, what’s bugging them was Jaejoong and Yunho we’re both clueless on what they felt to each other for three years.

 

 

“Hyunchul, what are you doing beside the pillars?” Karam wants to kill himself at that very moment. He turned around and saw his best friend along with Jay, approaching. Mika take a quick look beside the pillar and gazed back to Karam before he patted his friend’s back.

“You should comfort Changmin.”

Karam shook his head. “I’m useless.”

“What’s wrong?” Jay asked.

“I don’t know either.”

Jay filled up his pockets with his hands, eyes never leaving the looks of his hyung. Mika keep looking back and forth until he saw Jaejoong, angrily approaching the place where the other hyungdeul was.

“Oh no.” he whispered. Karam and Jay looked at their hyung.

“Let him.” Karam mumbled. “He needs to do this on his own.”

“Park Yoochun!”

Everyone fell ill. They’ve followed where they heard the voice and surprised when they found Jaejoong threw the notebook that he was holding to Yoochun.

“What do you expect me to do with this? Read it and be happy? What the is wrong with all of you! Don’t you know how distressed I am and you are making me read this bull that is all about Yunho’s admiration towards Heechul-hyung?” Jaejoong madly asked.

 

(Jaejoong’s POV)

 

Yoochun’s eyes never leave the diary. Junsu and Changmin were standing behind him. They were eager for me to read it and I’ll found out that it was all about Heechul hyung. I do know that he cherish him ever since. What are they motives for this? All of them know that I liked Yunho and making me read this bull is simply ridiculous.

“What?” I asked. I don’t care how many eyes are on me now. I wanted to know why?

Changmin held my arms. “Hyung…” I darted my eyes on him as I yanked away from his hold. “It’s for you to realize things, hyung.”

“Realize? To realize?” I sarcastically said. “To realize that Yunho is in love with Heechul-hyung. So I should stop loving him because he won’t see me more than friend?”

Tears fill up my eyes, I shouldn’t be crying. “I know that Min, I know that. I know that for ing three years! But look, I’m still here, hoping for him to wake up because he has to know my feelings! Don’t you guys get it? No matter how hard I try not to think about him, I can’t. My heart does not follow what I wanted him to do. The feelings that I am emitting is getting stronger and stronger then you want me to realize things? That’s absurd!”

I forcefully pushed Min out of my way. I need to be alone. I need to be. I can’t see anything clearly and was surprised when someone dragged me back there. I looked at to Karam with hurtful eyes but he won’t dare to look at me.

Why did they make me read his diary? Do they think that if I read that, I would stop loving Yunho? I never did. Although I know that he only wants Heechul-hyung before I met him, it’ll never been my reason not to love him. Why? Why they can’t understand what I feel?

 

(Jonghyun’s POV)

 

I was about to approach Taemin when I saw Karam dragging Jaejoong-hyung where the other hyungdeul are. I ran to them and found Jaejoong-hyung awkwardly crying. I saw Onew-hyung with the rest following me. Junsu-hyung was also crying in hold of Yoochun-hyung. A notebook was handed by Changmin-hyung but Jaejoong-hyung slapped it away.

“I already realized everything, Changmin! Take it. If you want me to stop seeing Yunho in other way, you should tell me so. It’s tormenting me.” Jaejoong-hyung scowled.

Taemin and Key ran and comfort him. “It really hurts, Changmin. Really is.”

“It wasn’t like that, hyung.”I heard Karam paused. “You find it hurts because you were still in the part where you don’t exist. The reason why we want you to read it is to realize. We’re sorry if you are hurt about Chullie-hyung’s existence but please. Just please hyung. Read it until very end.”

I saw Jaejoong-hyung’s eyed widened with Karam’s words. “You know Heechul-hyung?”

Karam nod, making Jaejoong-hyung whimpered even more. “H-how come i-I –“

“He’s been here visiting everyone.”

Jaejoong-hyung’s eyes looked at us and I swallowed. “How about you, Jonghyun? Taemin? Key? Minho? Onew? Do you guys know him?”

We all nod. We can’t lie anyway. “What’s the purpose of me reading this, when all of you knew him? I can’t do this. I can’t!”

Hyung was about to walked away when I stopped him. “Hyung, help yourself too. We want to save yourself from pain that’s why we want you to read the notebook.”

“You are drowning me with pain, Jonghyun!” he shouted. “You guys are drowning me with that ing notebook!”

I saw Key took the notebook from floor and hand it to Jaejoong-hyung. Hyung looked at him with confusement. I saw Kibum smiled, a smile that is full of explanations. “What’s love without agony?” he asked. Jaejoong-hyung only stared at him. Kibum breathes before shoving it to hyung again.

“In love, there is always enduring the pain. It will be not love if one or both person is not hurting. You are crying in distressed right now because you love Yunho-hyung so much. If you really love him, no matter how hurt it was, you wouldn’t stop. In that way, you won’t kill yourself in guilt.”

 

~*KRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG*~

 

I quickly took the notebook from Key’s hold and placed it inside Jaejoong-hyung’s bag. I peeked on the clock of my phone and find there is still 45 minutes left before the classes starts.

“Why does the ring bells too early?” Minho asked. I just shrugged my shoulders when I saw Seungri approaching us. He told that Mr. Kim, our Guidance Counselor, has announcement due to Yunho-hyung’s condition.

 

(3^rd person)

 

 

Everyone gathered in the lobby as Mr. Kim, took the stage and caught everyone’s attention. He looked at to everyone, as if looking for someone. When he saw the Jaejoong, he clearly speaks.

“We all know what happened last Saturday.”  He stated sadly. Changmin can only roll his eyes.  “Unfortunately, dawn yesterday, Mr. Jung of Class 2-A is now comatose. We, Seoul Academy, were very sad to know he’s condition.” He paused before eyeing Changmin and Yoochun and smirked. The men looked at each other, trying to hold their grief. “We decided to cancel the Year-end party to respect the mourning of Jung family. And yesterday, we also decided that Choi Siwon will replace Jung Yunho as a Football team captain for a mean time.”

Changmin growled in anger, fist curl in too much grip. Yoochun held his temple before stomping at his place. This is not the first time that Mr. Kim mocking them. He always did. The three of them can’t get the idea of why is he trying to bring the three of them down.

“Is it fine, Mr. Shim and Mr. Park?” he mocked them once more. The taller man had it enough. He was about to walk up front when Karam held his arms and shook his head.

Yoochun gritted his teeth before he murmured. “This man is going to hell.”

Changmin hissed. “That’s inappropriate for us, Mr. Kim. You should ask us first before making decisions on your own. I believe Yunho-hyung wouldn’t like that if he were to find it out?”

“Are you trying to tell me that I’m doing it wrong, Mr. Shim? I believe I can do it without asking for your permission or –“

“That’s bull, Mr. Kim.”

Everyone felt silent; eyes darted to small voice that blurted those words out loud. Jaejoong’s fist curled. He withdrew a smile trying to control his anger. “That’s shameful of you, Mr. Kim. Of course it’s important, that’d hurt the side of stupor one back in hospital, don’t you think so?”

“How dare you?” Mr. Kim looked surprised. He doesn’t expect his so good and favorite student will answer him back. “How disgraceful and –“

“Oh, really?” Jaejoong mocked. “Then what do you call about yourself? How low of you. Just because you don’t like Yunho, Changmin and Yoochun that’s why you are trying your best to let them down? And Siwon? As the team captain? It should be Changmin right? He’s better than him, in fact a way lot better.”

The counselor gritted his teeth as he pointed out a finger in anger. “You –“

“What’s the commotion?”

Everyone stopped talking, eyes widened.