Kyuhyun closed his eyes and started counting sheep in order to tire his mind and get some sleep. Instead, images of a smiley man with slight puffy cheeks came to his mind.

Why am I thinking about a guy? I’m not even gay. Just because I had that high school crush over a guy, and I am now thinking about a guy doesn’t make me gay right?

What was that the name of the guy which he had a crush on during high school? How did he look like?

Kyuhyun tried his best to recollect the name and face but his mind was a blank. Perhaps he was starting to feel tired, or high school was so long ago and the incident was so insignificant that he just banished the memories aside.

His mind turned to something more pressing instead and worrying instead – the present. He could not dispel the thought that a “strange phenomenon” has been recurring the last few days. Kyuhyun’s heart started to race faster and beat erratically when that smiley male with was around or near.  

What does this mean? Is there something wrong with me? Am I going to suffer another relapse? Is this new heart developing a new problem that I don’t know of? 

It first started at Gimpo Airport around the check-in area. Kyuhyun felt his heart being squeezed and then thumping hard on his chest. It was as though his heart was ready to burst open from his chest. But it lasted a few seconds and the group of them had to proceed for check-in so Kyuhyun just dismissed the episode.

But Kyuhyun could not ignore the second time when it happened at Jeju Airport in the arrivals hall. He was waiting next to Victoria for Donghae to return with the car key when he felt a discomfort in his chest. His felt his heart pump faster, his heartbeat accelerating. His breath started to hitch. He turned towards Victoria who was alarmed at his pained expression and sweat pouring from his forehead. Victoria gripped him by his arm as he leaned himself on her for support.

The whole ordeal last for a minute or longer but it seemed like an eternity to Kyuhyun.

And then a third time occurred during his tour of the Manjanggul Cave with Victoria. As they made their way out of the cave somewhere at the halfway mark, he felt his heart beating faster than usual. He felt a burning desire and longing within his heart. Suddenly, there were tears in his eyes as Kyuhyun paused in his tracks and scanned the surroundings in hope as Victoria clutched onto his arm.

“Kyuhyun, are you okay?” Victoria asked worriedly. “Are you in pain or something? Do we need to get you to the hospital or anything? Don’t scare me.”

“Kyuhyun...?” she repeated herself when there was no reply from him. 

His heart had calmed down by then as he turned to Victoria who was nearly in tears.

“Do we need to go to the hospital or something? Do you want to go back to Seoul to see the specialist?” she gushed.

Kyuhyun kissed her on the forehead and whispered, “I don’t know why I’m like this. But I’m fine. Don’t worry. I can take it. I feel healthy.”

“But this is the second time. It’s better that you get some medical attention...” Victoria protested.

“I’ll see the specialist immediately when we get back to Seoul. I have my medicine with me. It’s fine. Maybe I’m still trying to get used to this new heart. After all, this is the first time after the operation that I’m actually doing some strenuous activity,” Kyuhyun comforted her.

“But this isn’t strenuous...”

Kyuhyun shushed her as he put his fingers on her lips and planted another kiss on her forehead.

Just then he felt something or someone brush again his jacket sending him a tingling sensation down his body and a heart palpitation, and causing him to freeze and momentarily lose his awareness. When he came around, he swung around to skim through his surroundings.

What happened? Who or what was that? What was I feeling?

But that person or thing had long passed by him. People were continuing to walk past them in the cave.

“Kyuhyun...Kyuhyun...” Victoria called out. “Are you okay? Is something wrong?”

“I’m sorry.” he responded. “Everything’s fine. Come on, let’s go.”

......

Victoria and Donghae tried to dissuade Kyuhyun from ascending Seongsan Ilchubong as they were afraid his heart would not be able take the strain of the climb. However, he insisted on doing so as he wanted to watch the sunrise from the peak. Kyuhyun was not an outdoors person – he never had any interest in watching the sunrise or climbing mountains, yet he just felt he needed to be there.

Despite his assurances that he would be fine and promises that he would not strain himself, Victoria and Donghae could not help but worry about Kyuhyun and insisted on accompanying him that morning and had agreed on an appointed time to meet at the hotel lobby before dawn.

Kyuhyun rose early and sent a text message to both Donghae and Victoria to remind them about their rendezvous but they did not acknowledge his message. So after a while, he decided to call them on their handphone, but Victoria’s was turned off while Donghae didn’t pick up the call.

“So much for wanting to accompany me,” Kyuhyun scoffed as he threw a cardigan over himself. “They can’t even get up this early.”

He decided to go to the hotel lobby to wait for them to turn up. But after minutes, neither of them showed. Glancing at his watch, Kyuhyun was worried that he would not be able to make it for the sunrise on time. Nevertheless he decided to head up to their bedrooms and knock on their door for one last confirmation, but there was still no response from either of them. As such, he headed off for Seongsan Ilchubong by himself. It wasn’t a far walk and he enjoyed the calm and quiet of the morning and the cool wind which refreshed his senses.

The trek up was not as difficult as Kyuhyun had imagined it to be. He strolled and stopped for breathers along the way, and used the handrails as support. It might have taken him a little longer to get to the top, but he did arrive before the sunrise.

By then a good crowd had congregated on the peak, and so Kyuhyun found a less crowded spot at a corner of the peak. With his hands resting on the railings, he gazed into the sky as he lost himself in thought.

This wasn’t the first time he had been to Jeju. But this was the first time up on Seongsan Ilchubong. In fact, Kyuhyun wondered what he was doing here on the peak, or even in Jeju. He had been there a few times that the place has lost its magic on him, but he felt compelled to go as though as was a treasure waiting for him to discover there.

The shoot’s location was suggested by Heechul. Normally, he would not go on location with the shoots, but he felt an inner urging to be there, and with Victoria as the model, he thought it would be a good idea to spend time together on a holiday. They’ve had not had a holiday since the accident. He also somewhat felt his feelings for her had cooled off, so he thought that a holiday might help him to rekindle the passion he had for her.

He felt a sense of déjà-vu standing on top of Seongsan Ilchubong which he felt strange. But he brushed it off when the crowd alerted one another to the sunrise.

Kyuhyun was not someone who enjoys scenery. He liked arts and performances, visiting one of the impressive architectures, catching a musical in Broadway or sitting at a cafe in Europe and relaxing. So he was quite impressed at the sight, when the hue of the sun rose over the horizon and brightened the sky. He did not bring a camera and he just revelled in the sight.

Just as the darkness of the night dissipated with the sun’s rising, and just like any new beginnings, he hoped for a new beginning for himself. Kyuhyun hoped that the days of darkness living under an illness and on the threat of death would disappear with the heart transplant he received.

And he felt really grateful – thankful for being able to rise from his sleep – to be able to witness to and live another day.

No wonder some people like to watch the sunrise, perhaps it’s a reminder to them of a new beginning – a reminder of them that life and thus hope exist, Kyuhyun thought.

The crowd slowly dwindled. He could sense the flash of a camera. He was about to turn for a look when all of a sudden, Kyuhyun felt his heart beating faster. His body arched forward as he gripped onto the handrail with one hand while his other hand clutched at his chest. He took deep breaths and tried to calm himself.

It’s just arrhythmia, Kyuhyun. You don’t why is your heart behaving like this, but you’re fine. You have a new heart. The doctor said you would live. So don’t worry.

When his heartbeat returned to normal, he turned around and spotted a male with his camera still in hand looking at his direction. The male seemed to be rooted to the spot. Kyuhyun sauntered over to the male. However, he seemed to have noticed Kyuhyun, but Kyuhyun blocked his path and glared at the male.

“Have you been photographing me?” Kyuhyun demanded.

“I suppose that it is only good manners to inform the other person that you’re photographing him,” Kyuhyun stated.

It was then he studied the other male more intently. He had a short crop and was pleasant looking. His eyebrows arched nicely; he had almond shaped eyes, rather luscious lips, and his cheeks were a little on the puffy side but still cute.

“It’s…a…public…place,” Sungmin spluttered.

Sungmin struggled for a good reason, “Anyone can take photographs.” Sizing up his courage, he said confidently, “That’s right. Anyone can take photos here.”

Kyuhyun found Sungmin’s defence rather intriguing. His expression was rather cute – he was trying his best to appear assertive, yet he could not conceal that bit of anxiety when confronting Kyuhyun. His hands were trembling at least.

Glancing at Sungmin’s camera, he guessed that Sungmin was an avid photographer.

Kyuhyun smirked. “That’s true. But why are you wasting your time taking photos? I know that the sunrise is beautiful, but shouldn’t you take the time off to relax and savour that special moment instead of busying yourself with trying to capture the moment? Isn’t it matter to capture that moment in your mind?”

And just immediately after he uttered those words, Kyuhyun found himself feeling surprised at what he said since he was in the magazine business and photography plays an important aspect. Thus, he did know how or why he said those words. It just rolled off his tongue. However, the scene felt familiar. He was certain it never happened in real life. Did it happen in his dreams?

Just then Kyuhyun noticed the shorter male looking all dazed and ashen.

“Hey, are you okay?” Kyuhyun asked, but there was no reply. He repeated the question a few times before the other party lifted his head slightly and their gazes met.

“I’m fine,” he mouthed softly.

Just then Kyuhyun felt a sharp, piercing pain in his heart and he bent over and clutched his chest.

The stranger looked really concern as he quickly fished for his handphone. “Shall I call for medical assistance?”

“I’m…fine…it’s nothing…” Kyuhyun replied in between gasps. Sorry to have alarmed you.”

They continued to stare at one another awkwardly before Kyuhyun finally spoke, “Thanks for offering to help. I have to go.”

“Can you manage the walk downwards on your own? Do you need me to accompany you?” the other person offered.

He declined Sungmin’s gesture.

“What if something happens to you on the way?” the other party asked worriedly.

“I’m fine,” Kyuhyun smiled. “I’ve made it up here, haven’t I? Thanks for the concern.”

Pointing to his face, Kyuhyun continued. “Don’t worry. I’ll make sure you won’t this handsome face in tomorrow’s news.”

Just as Kyuhyun took leave from the photographer, he paused and turned around. “I forgot to tell you something. If you ever get up here again, just enjoy the sunrise and scenery and don’t worry about the photos.”

Kyuhyun waved goodbye, turned and strolled off. But as Kyuhyun was about to commence his descent, he heard someone calling out for him.

He turned around. It was the same guy.

“What’s up?” Kyuhyun asked.

“The…photos…I took of you…I’m really sorry…but…” Sungmin stammered.

“You can keep those,” Kyuhyun shrugged.

“Gamsa-hamnida.”

Kyuhyun smiled and finally began his descent.

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So this chapter is about Kyuhyun recollecting the first of his strange feelings when he met Sungmin. It is mainly his point of view. Next chapter would also be Kyuhyun's point if view. 

So Kyuhyun had a crush on a guy in high school. Will this person appear to ruin KyuMin? What do you think?

Thanks for all the comments and subscriptions so far. Please keep them coming. I know the story is a bit slow, but please bear with me...

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