~*~Chapter 18~*~

~*~*~

Dear Sehun,

Long time no see right? I’m doing all well, everything is fine. I’m happy now.

Me and Yixing are renting the upper-floor of a pretty big house in Busan form an old lady. I like her; she even gave us our own kitchen and bathroom.

We even have our own door to enter the house with.

The lady is like… Minseok, but she is older and female.

But she takes care of us a lot.

By the way, do you know what day it is tomorrow? Off course you don’t.

It’s April 20^th! My birthday! Can you imagine? I will be twenty-three tomorrow!

Maybe I have to socialize with Yixing now…

Well bye-bye!

Love,

Luhan.

~*~*~

Luhan put the pencil down on the desk and looked at Yixing, who was lying in his bed while reading a new book Luhan never had seen before.

“What are you reading?” Luhan asked and tried to watch the cover of the book.

“A collection of different novels.” Yixing replied without moving his gaze from the book to Luhan.

Luhan changed seat from the desk to Yixing’s bed as well. “Can I ask you something?”

Yixing put the book down and smiled at Luhan. “I know; it’s your birthday tomorrow. And yes, I have prepared something”

Luhan chuckled but shook on his head. “It’s something else… do you think I’m weird or crazy for writing letters to Sehun?”

Yixing rolled over on his stomach and looked deep into Luhan’s eyes. “To be honest; no I don’t think it’s weird. I think it’s beautiful.”

Luhan’s eyes widened. “Y-you really think so? Sehun is not even real”

Yixing shook his head towards Luhan; his dark hair flew from one side of his head to another. “He was always being real… for you. I believe that there will be a person you will love as much as Sehun out there. I don’t know who but I believe that there will be one”

“I have hurt so many people… the ones I love the most. My parents left me when they found out about my… mental disorder… I will only end up hurting Minseok, whatever I do”

Yixing sat up and grabbed Luhan’s hands. He gently them with this thumbs. “Luhan… you’re like a…. snowdrop.”

Luhan chuckled, Yixing knew as much as everyone how much Luhan loves snowdrops. “You’re lying”

Yixing shook his head. “No, you bloom in the spring. You’re fragile and small”

Yixing let go of Luhan’s hand and instead began to stoke Luhan’s cheek with one if his hands. “But you’re also beautiful. You’re so similar to a snowdrop and that’s what I like about you. You’re afraid that people will end up getting hurt because of you. You try your best to not hurt them.”

Luhan shook his head; a tear fell down from his cheek. “No… Minseok was right, I’m selfish”

Yixing began to dry Luhan’s tears. “You might be, but you need other people. You need someone who can understand you. Did Minseok ever understand you?”

Luhan had always believed that Minseok was the only person who ever would know the real Luhan. He had never imagined Yixing to come there and be his support when Minseok was only yelling at him.

“I believe he did understand me, he made his life circulate around me” Luhan began to dry his own tears as well.

“That’s true, but did he ever really know what you were thinking of? He loved you so much, I believe he still does, maybe he was blind to what you really needed”

~*~*~

“So what have you been up to?” Jongdae asked.

Minseok smiled towards Jongdae; he had been really busy since he last met Jongdae. He had got his heart broken by the only person he ever would love, he had been disappointed towards his best friend and he had seen his best friend and love leave him together with another man.

Minseok shook on his head. “Nothing much, how about you?”

Jongdae took a sip from his black coffee. “The same, I believe”

“It’s nice seeing you actually” Minseok murmured and smiled.

He wasn’t lying; he felt that Jongdae probably was one of the few persons out there who actually knew Minseok. The only one who ever had cared about asking how he was feeling.

“It’s nice to meet you too. How are you?”

Minseok shrugged. “Fine, thanks”

It was an obvious lie, Minseok had always been bad at telling lies and this wasn’t an exception.

“You know” Jongdae studied Minseok. “You don’t look that fine. Has something happened?”

Minseok sighed. “You remember Luhan? The guy I told you about before?”

Jongdae nodded but he didn’t say anything.

“I’ve just come to notice that he wasn’t the person I thought he would be. I’ve done so much for him, but he has never done anything for me. He took me for granted and I got tired of it. We didn’t speak for I don’t know how long and how he has moved”

Jongdae smiled and nodded understanding. “It’s hard, right? People are never like we want them to be.”

~*~*~

“You know what?” Luhan was lying in the bed together with Yixing, who was hugging Luhan from behind.

“What?” Yixing buried his face in Luhan’s blonde hair.

“I think I never will move on from Sehun… I’m sorry”

Luhan felt a warm breeze hit his neck; it was Yixing’s breath as he spoke:

“It’s fine; I can be your friend. I’m good with anything”

Luhan shivered at the feeling of air touching his neck. “Are you sure?”

Yixing nodded. “One hundred percent positive”

~*~*~

That night, when Yixing was asleep, Luhan went up once again. He took a seat by his desk and began to write a letter.

This letter was just having two sentences.

~*~*~

Dear Sehun,

I miss you…

I will always love you, with my whole heart…

Love,

Luhan

This is actually where I had planned on ending this story.

But I will now as you guys; do you want me to continue with this or end it here?