Hyukjae’s POV

But I never regret to know you and love you.

Lee Hyukjae I will keep our good memories. I, Lee Donghae love Lee Hyukjae with all my heart.

Let’s pretend I am 5 years old and you’re 6 years old. The time when we first met. When you started to change my life.

My best friend forever, good bye 

Love you,

Your forever Hae <3

Stop it!

Just stop this nonsense!

It’s dreaming right? Come one Hyukjae! Wake up! It’s not a nice dream, it is nightmare and you have to wake up!

‘Hyung! Stop slapping yourself!’ My hand was being hold by him.

I stared him blankly and I couldn’t say anything.

He took my phone and read the message and I kept slapping my cheeks.

‘Oh !’ I heard that he was cursing.

He shook my body, ‘Oh please Hyukjae. We have to do something! Back to your sense! It’s real! And you have to admit it.’

I stared him. My mind was blank. There was nothing in my head.

‘Hyung!! Wake up! We have to save him.’ He shook my body again but I kept staring him blankly.

I didn’t realize but I knew that I was crying now.

‘I’m crying Kyu.’

‘I KNOW! But it’s not the time. Please don’t go crazy now. We still can save him!’ He shouted to me.

‘How if we can’t save him?’ I asked him.

‘Have a positive thinking, will you?’

I had enough to be an for 20 years. Maybe it’s my karma.

I should confess my feeling long time ago. I should not be the fool who lost in selfishness and fear. I should have realized that I can not live without him. I did not realize it because I always see him every day, he's always taken care of me every day, and I'm sure he will not leave me.

But when I face this reality, I do not know what I should do. I am afraid to find him and discover he can not be saved. But I was more afraid to not look for it, because I believe now that I can not live without it. I love him. I am aware of that.

‘Let’s track his location from the phone that he used to send me this text message.’

I finally came back to my sense. I have to save him. HAVE TO! I will apologize to him and I will make him happy forever. I will marry him and I will love him until the day we die.

‘Ok.’

Kyuhyun asked his friend that knows about the thing like this.

I couldn’t stay in my seat. I was worried until I think I want to die.

‘Let’s go! I know where he is now.’ Kyuhyun pulled my hand and run toward the car.

He drove the car as soon as he could.

‘For the people who want to go to Yeouido, please don’t come to that area, because there is car accident near Seogangdaegyo Bride. Thank you.’

I heard the news from radio and I could fell Kyuhyun’s body stiffness.’

‘!’ He was cursing and drove faster that before.

‘Hey! What’s wrong?’ I asked him.

‘Donghae is near Hasu-dong and he must have passed Seogangdaegyo bridge if he were near Hasu-dong.’

‘WHAT?!’

‘We have to arrive there as soon as we could and prove it.’

We arrived and there were very huge crowds. I immediately was running out of the car. I have to make sure that he was not Donghae and I can wake up from my nightmare.

He's not Donghae, people who are in accidents not Donghae. He's fine now and is probably waiting for me at home. I force people to pave the way for me. I encourage them with a vengeance. I am sure that he is not Donghae, but I do not know why I was crying so hard.

My heart is very sore and my legs felt weak. The more the crowd as I passed the weight of my body. I'm scared! I’m afraid to accept reality! I fear that my nightmare has become a reality. I tried to convince myself, but my heart was still sore, hot, such as cut and burned.

I finally reached the front of the crowd and there was a line of police. I saw the wrecked car in front of my eyes.

'What happened?' I asked them.

'There was an accident here a while ago and now police are issuing a victim of attempted car.'

‘Do you know who they are?’

‘People said that it was two persons.’

‘Female?’

‘No. Male.’

‘Do you know how they could be involved in this accident?’

‘I don’t know. But many people said to me that car suddenly off track. They run up against the track and there was a big truck coming from the opposite direction.’

‘By the way, why do you cry? Are they your family?’

I really wanted to say NO! But, I couldn’t. I didn’t know why but my heart didn’t want to hear me.

Suddenly I felt someone held my shoulder from behind.

‘Kyu?’

‘Calm down hyung.’

‘I’m ok.’

‘No you’re not.’

‘YES! I’m ok!’

‘HYUKJAE! I was worried too, of course. I love him too. But we need to calm down. He needs us.’

‘You speak as if the accident is Donghae. He's fine! We just happened to pass by this street and go down to see it. He was not a victim of an accident. He's fine! He is healthy! He would smile at me when we go home later. Therefore, let us go home. Do not make him wait long at home!’

I pulled his hand but he didn’t move a bit.

Suddenly he slapped my cheeks.

‘WHAT THE HELL??’

‘WAKE UP HYUKJAE!!!!!!!’

‘I’M ALREADY WAKE UP! YOU’RE THE ONE WHO SHOULD WAKE UP!’

‘The accident victims are Donghae and his father.’ He whispered to me.

‘Are you kidding me?’

‘No. I’m not. I knew it from my friends.’

‘Who is your friend? GOD?’

‘He is the police who are handling the accident at this time.’

‘He didn’t know Donghae.’ I kept denying.

‘He knows. I sent him Donghae’s picture and he’s sure of that.’

‘It’s not April mob Kyu and you can’t fool me.’

He suddenly pulled my hand and dragged me inside line of police.

‘What are you doing?’

‘To make you realize that I’m not lying and you have to admit this fact!’

‘Cho Kyuhyun! I remember enough that you said that you loved him. But how could you so calm down now?? You don’t see me? I look like a ! I’m in mess!’

‘I was worried.’ He said but didn’t look at me.

‘NO! YOU’RE NOT!’

‘YOU DON’T NEED TO SHOUT AT ME!’

He finally looked at me. His eyes were red and I knew he was crying.

‘You think I’m not worried? Bull! I almost had a hearth attack when I had read his message. I kept calm because I saw that you’re really hurt. If I also fell, who would seek help? Did not you think my heart was pounding hard too? Anxious? Fear? No! That is not enough. You think I could drive the car calmly? NO! I kept shaking, but you did not notice it, because you're busy with your own mind. When you got out of the car regardless, I tried to call my friend and asked who the accident victim. And you want to know what my feelings when I knew that it was Donghae? I just wanted to jump from the bridge at that time! I love to him! You can not compare my love for him with you! I loved him sincerely for 15 years. We have different concerns here. You worry about not being able to see him because you feel sorry have not been able to convey your feelings and treat him malicious before. But I am afraid not to see him because it was so much love that I gave to him so I do not know anymore if I was still able to love anyone else besides him.’

Now he was crying badly. I hugged him and I really felt sorry to him. I was too selfish.

‘I’m sorry. I’m sorry.’

He lifts his head and broke my hug.

‘It’s not the time for crying. We need to see him.’

Yes! We need to see him and I have to admit that it’s reality. I’m not dreaming. Donghae is in accident now and I don’t know his condition at all. I don’t know if he can be saved or not. But from what Kyuhyun said before, I’m sure about one thing. Yes, I’m afraid not being able to see him because I fell sorry to him. I still haven’t been able to convey my feelings to him. But more than that, I finally realized that I, Lee Hyukjae, the stupidest person in world, realized that Lee Donghae is his universe now.