Strange. Hyukjae thought, eyeing the other creatures. These wern't... dogs or cats, something he'd seen on a regular basis on the end of a rope towing the two legged down the street. These had ugly faces and weird expressions and although at first his curiousity got the best of him he was soon retreating, intending to do nothing more than to jump into the safety of Donghae's arms.

 

Instead when he swiveled around he was greeted with hard railings hitting his face, the gate shut that hadn't been before. Letting out a low whine of understanding his fingers curled around them, trying to squeeze his nose between the bars, calling out for the silhouette of Donghae's retreating back. "Mmm..." He murmured, arms outstretched and fingers grasping as if his willpower would be enough to bring him back.

 

He didn't know what he'd done that would end up with Donghae not wanting him. He wracked his brain trying to think about what on earth it could have been. Sure he'd chewed on Donghaes favorite pair of earphones but he had plenty more, it surely couldn't have been that. 

 

Banging his head against the bars sadly he couldn't bring himself to think of what he'd done wrong. 

 

Maybe he was only here for a while... maybe donghae was trying to keep him safe from his two legged 'friend'. Honestly the thought of the other human had him scrunching his face up in confusion. 

 

He honestly didn't know where it came from but Kyu obviously wasn't as patient as he appeared in front of Donghae. 

 

Hyukjae was, although anxious at having a third member in the house after so long it being just him and Donghae but he'd tried his best to welcome him into the house.

 

He would have liked to believe that the other human had only meant to brush him off, maybe he hadn't meant to hit him so hard and Hyukjae certainly knew he himself never intended on biting him. 

 

It was okay. He thought, his large ears rolling in anticipating. Donghae was coming back for him. 

 

It took about an hour of his soft howling, various guests to the zoo casting a wary glance in his direction for him to realize that he was wrong. For his ears to flatten against his head in sad, submissive defeat.

 

 And the moment he stopped uttering soft pleas for Donghae to return was the moment he felt a rough grasp on his fur from behind...

 

--- DONGHAE ---

 

Donghae had a hard time keeping his forehead off the steering wheel the whole way home in dismay. His heart was already tugging back in the direction of the zoo and he considered sacrificing the embarrassment of just turning around and getting Hyukjae back again.

 

Instead he filled his head with things that weren't exactly helping... but he needed a distraction. The look on Hyukjae's face when he bit Kyuhyun. The scar his friend would no doubt have. The place in Donghae's heart that had been empty for a while now. 

 

But was that just something everyone was insisting on him? Did he really need a physical relationship when in his heart he was fine as he was? What was this really achieving right now, he wasn't any better, in fact he was worse off now that he had absolutely no one in his life.

 

He could imagine just exactly what Kyuhyun would say. 'You need to take a step backwards before you can go forward."

 

The very idea itself squeezed tears from his eyes.

 

He allowed himself the small moment of self pity before he had to bottle it up and prevent his neighbors from seeing him cry. 

 

He had a horrible taste in his mouth that he didn't think just the tears could be creating.

 

Wringing his hands against the steering wheel to stop them from shaking he pulled over, drawing in deep breathes into his deprived lungs as he closed his eyes and tried to focus. 

 

Not now Hae... don't do it now, of all times. 

 

His mind had scattered into every place possible other than the one he really needed right now, which was to get out of the car without crushing his face on the ground and get inside so that he could calm the down.

 

But instead his body refused to cooperate and with his left side virtually numb, a nerve under his cheek twitch he merely groaned in response to something all too familiar and ignorant towards such tell tale signs he just dragged himself inside, beyond concern for himself at the moment.

 

Hyukjae. What was he doing right now? Had he already forgotten him?

 

Within seconds even Hae forgot himself, entering his home and just staring into space, all moments ceased apart from the twitching of his left arm. 

It felt strange to be laughing at that point in time but honestly, the situation he had landed himself in was ridiculous. Alone, completely and utterly alone. Maybe it was because there was something wrong with him. No one wanted someone who was broken, a bitter thought that had him biting the inside of his cheek in frustration, a hand reaching out to steady himself on the kitchen work top. 

 

He hated to admit defeat, all he really wanted was to curl up in a corner and just wallow in his misery.

 

But he was scared. Nothing changed, not from the days as a boy when he was in a class full of unfamiliar people having a fit, not even when he was surrounded by his parents did this ever get any easier. The thought of going through it again, to wake up confused and utterly alone on the floor had him choking on a sob that had been building for a while and although he already felt stupidly weak as it was... there was one person that actually cared, even remotely. Someone who'd been with him throughout most of his young life and so it was almost second nature for them to know what to do when Donghae failed to be able to catch himself when he fell.

 

Kyuhyun.

 

Arrogant bastard upon first inspection but sensible and kind hearted if you really knew him.

 

Well... he'd have to do.

 

Reaching into his pocket with trembling fingers, he ignored the heartbreaking screensaver still set on his phone and flicked through his contacts, hand clumsy enough that his insanely thin iphone slipped out of his grip, causing him to flinch and follow it down to the ground as his muscles gave way. And just like that he had no choice but to hit the call button, bracing himself on the kitchen tiles, already shivering with the tell tale signs of what was about to happen. 

"What?" Kyuhyun grumbled on the other side of the phone enough to make Donghae's twitching lip lift up into a temporary smirk.

 

"Kyu-" He whispered, voice failing him and upon very keen instincts he heard the other guy swear through the phone.

 

" Hae... hang on i'll be like two minutes okay..."

 

---- KYUHYUN ---

 

The fact that Kyuhyun was already driving past Donghae's house wasn't something he was willing to admit to him. Telling his friend that he merely wanted to check up on him was not something Kyuhyun was comfortable with. Most likely he would just make up some crap about how he was visiting somewhere nearby and was just conveniently nearby to save the day.

 

A story that heroic sounded much better to his ears.

 

He was slightly panicked though. Despite growing up with an epileptic Donghae that decided to have a fit in the most unhelpful places was something he was use too and when he helped him out it was just about the only compassionate side of him that... no one saw.

 

Donghae was after all always unconscious when it happened.

 

But Donghae hadn't needed him for a while and so he figured that no news was good news but now he was ringing him because his fits were getting bad again and that could only mean that Donghae was at another low point in his life.

 

Sighing to himself as he literally ran from his car on long legs, through the open front door, part of him hoping someone else had already gotten to Donghae and he could just take a step back for once but no, the quivering, no doubt unconscious form of Donghae alone on his kitchen floor, curled in on himself in a fetal position could only drag another sigh from Kyuhun as he slid over to him.

 

"Hae...?" He whispered, not anticipating any response as he pulled his head into his lap, hand hovering for a moment before he started running his fingers through his hair.

 

The uncontrollable spasming that wracked Donghae's body continued, and although it was scary at times to see how utterly out of control his friend was, he'd learnt by now that there really was nothing he could do other than comfort him.

 

"Shh.. oh hyung..." He muttered to himself, pressing his already bandaged palm to Donghae's forehead, no doubt he'd wacked it on the corner of the counter on his way down to embrace the floor, and it was now steadily bleeding down the side of his face.

 

Aish this guy was so careless.

 

When Donghae's shaking started to recede Kyuhyun curled around him anxiously, peering down at him with big chocolately eyes that would probably scare the guy to death when he came around.

 

Donghae's own brown eyes started blinking open, rolling up to look at Kyuhyun before flickering around the room, recognizing nothing for a moment before he locked his unsteady gaze back on Kyu again. "I...i..."

 

"I know." Kyuhyun murmured, needing no explanation. Donghae always got confused after this and no wonder he was extra confused after banging his head and splitting it open.

 

However a question from Donghae's behalf threw the normal level of confusion out the window.

 

"Kyu... wheres Hyukkie?"

 

_______________________________________________________________________________________

Things will get better i promise 

IN THE NEXT CHAPTER

i will write it as quickly as possible to get rid of all these sad feels

then PLOT TWIST in aprox. 4 chapters

Maybe less if i can't think of cute things for Eunhae to do.