Eating alone with Minhyun is still a bit awkward for me but he seems to be as cheerful as before. Every once in a while he will look at me and ask what I need, what I want and what I like to eat. He is a good cook and I’m very lucky to be one of the people who are able to taste his specialties. I am really thankful that after what have happened I’m still his friend.

That day when he left me standing outside my own dorm room I didn’t stop thinking of what I really felt. Minhyun’s really a great person that no one would dare to hurt him. He’s every women and men’s dream. Tall, handsome, smart and kind, what else does a person wants that is not Minhyun? However, as I thought about it, I realized that I don’t deserve a person like Minhyun. He genuinely showed how much he liked me and I really felt that I was liked. But I couldn’t give the feeling he wanted to receive. I made sure that on every time we’re together, I’d be able to show him how grateful I was. I tried liking him back the way he wanted me to like him but I couldn’t. I like him as a friend. A precious friend, and I don’t want a precious friend hurt because of me.

I waited for a phone call the rest of the day. I called him once in the afternoon but he said he was busy doing something so he’d just call when he’s already done. However, I received no phone call. That night I felt really disoriented and troubled. When I was having times like this I always ask Ren some advices. Although he seldom gave decent responses his teases comforted me. If only he was there that night, I wouldn’t face Minhyun in the morning looking like a zombie.

I woke up at the sound of knocks. I barely fell asleep because I was thinking of so many things the past night. Knowing that I was the only one in the room that time, I forced myself to stand up and open the door. When I unlocked it I was immediately shoved to the side and a beaming Minhyun entered the room. He went to my study table and put a paper bag full of bread on top of it. He then approached me and laughed when he finally got a clear sight of my face.

“I thought you’re a dinosaur JR-sshi. Why are you a panda today?” he asked.

I smiled at him because I still couldn’t think straight. My mind was almost blank that time. The man I was thinking the whole night’s making fun of me the next morning. Isn’t that unfair?

“Ya~ you already forgot how to speak? Come, let’s eat breakfast! We have a lot of things to do today.”

A lot of things to do? Did I forget something again? As if he had the capability of reading my mind, he said, “Let’s go out! It’s a beautiful Sunday morning JR-sshi. Let’s not waste the day, okay?”

I nodded and followed him to my little study table. He offered making hot chocolates for the both of us. When we’re done eating, he went back to his dorm room and I prepared for our date. After 1 hour we’re set. We left the school and headed to the bus stop.

“Minhyun-sshi, thank you for the breakfast a while ago.” I said to begin a conversation. We’re now waiting for a bus and I started sensing the growing cloud of awkwardness between us. He was different that day. Usually he’s the first one starting the chat and we’d end up with him being a speaker and I being his listener. He seemed out of his own self that day too, he didn’t hear what I said and I needed to repeat it.

“Oh, aahh, well you’ve mentioned that Ren won’t be around until later afternoon right. So I brought some bread. I know Ren has the habit of calling a delivery service for your breakfast—“

“How’d you know?”

“You’re being dumb again JR-sshi. I became his friend way before you. Of course I know him well, very well. And that rich kid doesn’t know how to cook, so he always calls the delivery service.” Minhyun explained.

I chuckled because I’ve been so dumb again. Of course, they became friends a long time ago. It’s impossible if they still didn’t know each other. No words had been said until the bus came. Normally, we just hang out somewhere near the school. We’re both not from Seoul so it’s hard to explore more. I asked Minhyun where we’re going and he’s no idea where too.

“I don’t know JR-sshi, somewhere a lot farther than the usual. Don’t worry, as long as we know how to read and how to ride a bus we won’t be lost.” He replied.

We ended up on an amusement park in the heart of Seoul. I really got static once I saw rides and games. I was 16 back then, still not old enough but can’t be considered young as well but I have to admit, the childish me still covers a big part of my identity.

That day Minhyun and I played like usual teenagers and I could see that both of us were enjoying a lot. However, the day is always limited and the sky gradually changed color from blue to yellow-orange. I also remembered that I needed to tell him my decision that day. We went to a fountain near the Ferris wheel and there I told him that I already have my answer.

“I think I know what your answer is JR-sshi.” He said.

“Let me say it Minhyun-sshi. I really like you, you know that right?” I asked, and he nodded in response. “And I don’t want to hurt you. You know that right?”

“I know it JR-sshi. And believe me, I don’t want to hear your answer. It’s clearly written on your face.”

“Oh—“

“Actually I intended not to call you back yesterday, I needed to think too. I don’t want to force myself to someone who won’t like me back the way I wanted to be liked back. Thank you for your effort though, I really appreciate it. And I’m really happy that you seem enjoying my company. Believe me JR-sshi, I already conditioned myself since last night. And an advice, a concealer’s really useful when you had a not-so-good sleep.”

“Minhyun-sshi, you’re not angry?” I asked as I felt tears stinging my eyes. I wanted him to hit me, to yell at me, to be angry but that’s not what I saw. He’s still smiling like he’s never been hurt.

“JR-sshi, I may look carefree and spoiled but I know better than being a butthurt. And besides, I’m perfect, everyone’s dying to be with me. HAHAHA, no, just kidding. Maybe I’m rushing such things. And I’m pretty sure you’re really not the one for me. How can you let go of a jackpot, JR-sshi? I’m happy, actually, because for the first time you’ve got to think for yourself. You know, you’ve always been so dumb.” He said while laughing.

“Sorry.”

“Don’t be. I still have some requests though, we’ll continue to be friends anyway. You have no other choice since I enjoy you and Ren’s company so much that I’ll haunt you wherever you go. Oh yes, my first request, can we ride the Ferris wheel?”

And so we rode the Ferris wheel. For a few seconds we were quiet observing the crowd below. When we reached the peak, he asked me a question that never in my life have I asked myself, well, that time’s the first time.

“So, who do like JR-sshi? You know, the reason why you knew it’s not me.” He asked, with eyes that made his question look like a rhetoric one.

“Huh?” I really didn’t know who and I was all sincere that I’d no idea. However, he playfully hit me on the shoulders, saying that I was making it hard for him. “But I really don’t know, Minhyun-sshi.”

“JR-sshi, why are you so stupid sometimes?”

“How—“

“Who’s the first person you’ve thought of when you read the final requirement JR-sshi?”

“I… don’t know.”

“Don’t you I-don’t-know me. To tell you the truth I actually fell in love with your sketches first. The sketches I saw on your table when Ren transferred to your room. Whose eyes were that? The lips? Even his nail-art that time! Then I began observing you not knowing that I’ll fall instead. Your stolen glances, the way you acted like a crazy person when he ignored you for a week, the way your eyes lit up when you’re talking about him. You should’ve known that JR!” he kind-of yelled.

So he knew from the start that… And at that moment I realized a thing I really should have realized a bit earlier. But… “How’d you know, Minhyun-sshi?”

“Because you’re like an open book JR-sshi, you can easily be read. You’re too obvious. Well, I can’t blame you.”

“Why?”

“Because he’s your first love, right?”

My ringtone suddenly resonated inside before I could even open my mouth to speak. Still dazed, I ignored the phone and stared at Minhyun wide-eyed. He flicked my forehead to wake me up and told me to answer the phone.

“Ya! Where are you?”

I smiled as I hear the voice I wanted to hear so badly and I suddenly wanted to fly towards the source.

The food Minhyun cooked is really delicious that I don’t want to stop eating. When I feel uncomfortable, I offer to wash the dishes. Minhyun excused himself because of a phone call and I am left inside the kitchen. When I am finished cleaning, I roam around the room. I was lost in my own thoughts when I came that I didn’t have a good look on the house. When I reach the living room, I saw a cross-stitch hanging on the wall. A smile immediately creeps on my face as soon as I recognize that the people on the cross-stitch are Minhyun, Ren and me.

---

I'm supposed to post this a bit earlier but Ren tweeted! And then I panicked. XD Oh well, he tweeted I love you in different language (and my mother tongue isn't included XD Well it's okay... :>) and a photo of JR doing something... then a little earlier he tweeted a fantaken photo of him.. here~

He said he really likes this photo of him. ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ Credits to staREN ^^

Oooh yes, so how's the update?! Sorry if it's a bit later than my usual... It's only the start of the 2nd semester but I'm already tired. XD Unbeta-ed as always. THANKS TO THE READERS, SUBSCRIBERS AND COMMENTORS! Hihihi.

nowplaying: Run - Younha