“Speaking”

‘Thoughts’

At Age 7

Your POV

“Panda,” I called out to my best friend, Tao who’s two years older than me.

He laughs as he hands me a box with panda wrapping paper, my favorite animal next to a tigers of course.

“What this?”

“Open it,” he tells me with excitement ringing in his voice.

I nod and open it to see sitting there is a black and white stuff tiger, but its shading and pattern is more like a pandas. Just the shades change to show stripes of a tiger.  Around its neck is a little pendant with a panda face on it. I open it to see two pictures already inside of Tao and me.

“Panda I love it.”

He smiles proudly, “I thought I’d give that to you since you're moving to America tomorrow.”

I look down and nod my head trying to hide my tears.

Yet it doesn’t work I still start crying along with Tao.

“You had to remind me panda.”

I hang my head I feel myself being pulled against him and I let more tears fall from my eyes.

“I’m going to miss you, panda.”

“I know cause I’ll miss you more,” he laughs and pulled me in a tighter hug.

I know it is to hide his tears. Even though I know that he’s a crybaby he still at times tries to hide his tears from me.

I hear my mother shout for me and I look up to see my mother standing on top of the hill.

I looked back at Tao and he smiled at me, “We’ll be friends forever, but one day I want to marry you.”

I smile up at him and nod my head taking his hand, “Alright lets promise to love each other forever.”

Tao’s POV

When I watched her enter the car I let the water works fall without any control. I didn’t want to be a mess to her. I want her to remember me as her strong wushu warrior and her loving panda.

I know that I’ll always remember her as the girl who had stolen my heart and later ran off with it.

Present

“Sweetheart what do you think of our new home?”

I look up at an old traditional home on a wealthy side of Seoul and tsk in distaste.

My mother looks at me and sighs, “Sweetheart not everything can be the way you want it.”

I shrug my shoulders as I think to myself, ‘All I want is to see him again.’

I grab my suitcases and walk inside the old home looking around as I make my way to what is supposed to be my room.

I start moving things around setting up all my panda things around my room.

I look up and sigh, “Why is it I can only remember that one moment and not anything else about you. Panda why can’t I remember anything about you?”

I slip down under my covers and look up at the poster of a music group that I like.

I sigh and start to hum a little tune telling myself that I shouldn’t cry myself to sleep, but my mind doesn’t listen to me.

I fell asleep with the panda locket in my hands that will no longer open.

Still it gives me comfort from the pain of loneliness.