A/N: All I can say is I’m extremely sorry! I’ll try to write whenever I have time. Maybe once every one/two weeks. Honestly, I’ve been so incredibly busy and I can’t find much time for writing. :(

“Anyways, thanks for the ride,” I said after a few moments of silence, releasing my awkward hold on him. I grabbed my bag, and I felt a slight rush of heat push into my cheeks. Oddly, my heart was also fluctuating at an abnormal rate. Quickly, I pulled open the passenger door and slammed it behind me.

I peeked my head through the window and to my surprise, he seemed to be … sulking. Ugh, here it goes again. “You want to come in? My dad isn’t home yet.”

Kai immediately cut the engine and grinned. “Are you being dirty, _____?”

“The only thing that’s dirty about me is being associated with you,” I said wryly.

He got out of the car and followed behind me, eyeing my house with a particular amusement. He seemed fascinated that I actually resided in this house, one that differed from his by miles. I dug for my keys and my purse, and unlocked the front door. I headed inside first and he followed behind cautiously. I knew that he was observing my living room with keen eyes and despite my defensive attitude, I felt a bit self-conscious. Obviously, my house was a far cry from his grand mansion.

“I like your house. It’s cozy. It has a cozy vibe.”

“Vibe? You’re just saying it’s small.”

“No, no. It’s really cozy. It feels warm. My house just feels like a dump.”

“Thanks but I actually love your house.”

“So … where’s your room?” he asked, trailing his fingers over the coffee table.

“Proof that you’re the only dirty one here. It’s upstairs. And I doubt you’ll fit inside, it’s about the size of a cereal box.” Actually, it was a bit bigger but I was comparing it to the size of his very spacious room.

He shrugged and I decided that if he was so nonchalant, I could be also. I led him upstairs, through the hallway to my plain, whitewashed door. I opened it and flamboyantly gestured into my bedroom. It wasn’t messy considering that I had a minor OCD problem, but I was nevertheless slightly embarrassed. In contrast to his room, mine was bantam.

Kai smirked, “It’s not that small … in fact, I bet we’ll have enough room.”

“For what?”

He winked and abruptly grabbed my arms, pulling me into my bedroom and slamming the door. He pushed me against the wall and began to kiss me with such force I felt the air rush out of me within seconds. His lips were soft, plush against my own shocked pair. His enthusiasm surprised me, but it didn’t cripple my senses. I immediately kissed him back, but with less excitement. His fingers trailed against my searing skin, gently running down my back.

As fast as it began, he pulled away. “Can I ask you something, _____?”

“Sure,” I answered, pulling away. Most likely, his inquiry would be -related. Figures.

“What are you escaping from?”

I blinked, trying to fully process his question. “What?”

“I was just wondering … what are you running away from? Other than your ex. You don’t seemed so concerned over him anymore … it’s as if another problem replaced it.”

“Oh nothing!” I replied, a little bit too peppy. I waved him off with my hand and feigned a yawn, flopping onto my bed … did he think my mattress was too miniature in size?

“Don’t lie.”

I provided him eye contact, willing my features to turn into a convincing mask. “Honestly. It’s nothing other than Baekhyun.”

Kai sat down next to me, a look full of composure. He knew that I wasn’t willing to spill my secrets to him as soon as he wanted to me to, I could read it in his eyes. He was waiting for the moment when he would discover my secrets, and he knew that required patience. Not that I was complaining. I wasn’t ready to confess that my father was an alcoholic.

“So, what do you like to do? I feel as if I don’t know you as much as I should,” he began, back to his playboy mode. In other times, I would have been annoyed, but I was relieved that a diversion was so readily brought up.

“I dunno …,” I sighed, “I guess I like folding clothes and wiping tables.”

“What?”

“I think I have a bit OCD. Probably because those activities give me a peace of mind. Almost as if I could organize at least something in my life. I fold my clothes every night anyways. It’s almost like a cycle.”

“Well that’s new.”

“Pretty much.”

“That’s also pretty strange.”

“Look who’s talking.”

Kai grinned and began kissing me again. It wasn’t as intense as the previous fest, but it was still quite zealous. His hands entwined in my hair and in my shirt and each time his smooth fingers brushed against my skin, it felt as if an inferno ignited. We both collapsed on my bed, my sheets pushing us closer. His hands inched his way to my stomach, the oxygen drawing from my gut. His hands began to graze over my bare belly. He began to probe my ticklish spot and instantly, the ardent atmosphere vanished, in its place my choking laughter.

“God I ing hate you,” I managed to gasp as he leaned in closer.

“Oh ,” Kai suddenly whispered, releasing his hold on me. He heard the car pull in too.

I quickly sprung up, gathering my appearance and straightening my outfit. I dragged my fingers through the mess of my hair, pulling my locks back to their original position. Checking my face in my mirror, I cursed my flushed appearance. My profile revealed that I had committed a minor crime, such as hooking up with an enemy in my own bedroom without my father’s acknowledgement.

“Should I leave?” he asked breathlessly, flustered.

“No, it’s okay. Besides, if you go out, my dad’ll find out that I have a boy over. He won’t mind … much. Just only if we don’t do … you know.”

“What else do we do?”

Just like the geeks we were, we proceeded to entertain ourselves with board games. We spread out on our stomachs and truthfully, I enjoyed the hours that we spent together without the strings of . It was … entertaining and convivial. And he wasn’t too abominable in Monopoly either.

When it began to get darker, and after I kicked his in Connect 4 ten times in a row, he got up and stretched. “I think I should go home.”

“Sure, I’ll walk you down.” I packed up the board games first and brushed my clothes before following Kai down.

I doubted that my jovial mood could be ruined, but it quickly dropped down when the stench of strong whiskey wafted into my nose. It was fetid and more than anything, I desired to get Kai out of here as soon as possible. My cheeks scorched with embarrassment when I spotted a half-empty whiskey bottle on the coffee table. I prayed that Kai would not notice the bottle or the fact that my dad was absolutely ing drunk. I knew I should have pondered why my dad failed to check on me after he noticed the Porsche in the driveway. Having a shiny car more profitable than my dad’s salary wasn’t a normal occurrence. Kai wasn’t aware that my father was a recovering active drinker, but if my dad didn’t start bawling on the spot, I could probably rush him out.

“Baby!” Dad cried out as soon as I came in his line of sight. “My darling, darling baby!” Just ing amazing. He struggled onto his feet, stumbling as he came to greet me with a drunken hug. “I didn’t know you were home!” He spotted Kai and his bloodshot eyes narrowed. “Who’s this guy?”

I tried to keep my expression impassive. “This is Kim Jongin. He’s a friend of mine.”

He grabbed his whiskey bottle and came close to Kai, almost breathing down his neck. “A friend, huh? I bet you were having fun in my baby’s room … didn’t you!” Dad wobbled slightly before swigging down some whiskey. Ugh.

Kai didn’t flinch as my face flared a violent shade of red. “I enjoyed doing homework with your daughter sir.”

“Sure. That must be code for !” Dad snarled.

I grimaced. I wonder if he wasn’t so wasted as he let on.

“Dad, that’s pretty funny.” I forced a choked laughter, slapping my dad’s arm gently as if he were the best comedian in the world. If I had taken him seriously or guiltily, Dad would have caught on and assumed that he was telling the truth. But he wasn’t. He was bombed.

“I’m not being funny _____!” He swung his bottle and some of the whiskey sloshed onto the floor. “Stop acting so ty!”

I stopped my obviously false chuckling and glared at him. My father never derogated me, ever. I couldn’t recall a time when he called me anything less than “silly.” And here he was, drunk out of his mind, calling me a . I acted on intuition and pulled the bottle from his hand. “You’re drunk. Stop.”

For a moment, I felt pride in stopping my father from what he didn’t have the power to restrain from. I should have done this long ago, but it felt good to do it now.

“I’m going to go,” Kai said behind me.

I turned to say bye, but before I could, the bottle slipped from my hand and crashed onto the floor. Before my eyes, the whiskey sloshed onto the floor. I wasn’t concerned over the crappy alcohol at the moment. I could barely register the events. Previously, I was upright, about to wave to Kai and the next, I was sprawled on the floor, my temple throbbing. I didn’t feel the pulsating pain and much as I felt ultimate shock. I was stunned, rubbing my head repeatedly.

“That’s what you get for being a !” my dad bellowed, laughing.

I choked back a sob, closing my eyes and awaiting another blow.

It never arrived.

There was a heavy slam, and a grunt from my dad’s drunken voice. I immediately opened my eyes to find Kai moving away from my dad, swinging his fist. My dad was rubbing his jaw, which was an extreme shade of red, almost the tint of his bloodshot eyes. “You little !”

“Are you okay?” he asked me, ignoring my dad’s swearing.

“Did you just punch my dad?” I couldn’t exactly think straight. Everything was too frenetic for me to process. Did Kai actually smack him? A little … weird if I think about it.

“Yeah,” he admitted, blinking.

“You ing son of a ! Did you actually touch me?” Dad snarled, getting up from the floor, wobbling toward us, slurring his words. His eyes had trouble locating us.

“_____,” Kai said gently, “You’re coming with me.” Gingerly, he pulled me to my feet. I was still delirious, confused of the events. My head continued to vibrate, a ringing reminder of something my dad never did to me. He ushered me out the open door first then followed. I stood motionless on my porch, gazing at the dark street without fully understanding that it was a dark street. The air was cool, cascading on my hot skin.

“_____! You better not ing go with him, you little !” Dad yelled after me.

Kai steered me toward his car, opening the passenger’s door, gently guiding me in and buckling the seat belt. I heard faint screams coming from the house, but I was too dazed myself to understand what my father was snarling after me. I was sure he was calling me a .

The drive to Kai’s home was silent. I looked straight ahead, still trying to fully apprehend the moment my father’s fist impacted with my face. I couldn’t even begin to imagine what Kai thought. Did he believe that my dad was in that state most nights? What did he think of me now? I couldn’t help but feel humiliated, ashamed. More than anything, I wished Kai wasn’t there to see me like that.

I glanced at Kai and I noticed that he was looking at me, concerned. His mouth opened, then closed as if he were still debating his choice of words.

“I’m sorry you had to see that,” I managed to say. The lump in my throat wasn’t subsiding but growing. My dad was the sweetest man I know. He never laid a finger on me, never swore. This felt like a horrific nightmare. It didn’t seem possible that my dad managed to cuss his heart out at me nor did it seem real when he threw a punch at my head.

Kai remained quiet. We continued to drive until we reached his mansion. He pulled into the driveway and cut his engine and we sat, immobile in silence. Everything was out of control, and I had a feeling he knew what exactly I was running away from.

The lump in my throat grew and I couldn’t take it anymore. I began to cry, weeping quietly until I was screaming uncontrollably at nothing in particular. As I was letting my frustration out, Kai sat there silently, taking my hollering in. I finally managed to compose myself and when I wiped some of the tears away with the tissue he had offered me, he got out and promptly opened the door for me. He helped me get out and as I steadied myself, he pulled me in for the tightest hug I’ve ever experienced. I began to sob again, into his expensive cashmere sweater.

“I’m getting snot on your cashmere sweater,” I managed to say.

“It’s okay.”

I managed to calm down again and he guided me up the steps, into his home. He offered me a drink, but I denied. A beverage wouldn’t do anything for me. I sat down on his leather couch, taking in the warmth of his home. Kai joined me with a cup of water which he handed over. I took it anyway and gulped it down. He observed me silently, I could tell. I wondered if he was thinking horribly of me, wondering what other grisly activities occurred in my household.

When I was done drinking, I set the cup on the coffee table and stared at the hardwood floor.

“Do you need anything? Does your head hurt? Do you want me to get an ice pack?”

I shook my head numbly. My throat still ached from all the crying.

Kai reached over and brushed the wet strands of hair away from my face. “Why didn’t you tell me that your dad had a drinking problem?”

“I don’t know. I didn’t want to. It’ll pass anyway. He’s going through a divorce with my mom and he’s taking it pretty hard.”

“_____, you should talk to him when he’s sober.”

I didn’t respond.

“What’re you thinking about?”

“The things he said to me. I’m starting to actually think I’m a . I mean, my dad didn’t refrain from calling me that.”

“You’re not a . Of all the things you could be, you’d never be a .”

“Really?” I felt the momentum driving in my head, rushing out, the desire to lash. “What else could I ing be? I’m screwing a guy who’s not even my ing boyfriend and I lost my friends because I didn’t want to tell them. My dad just ing called me one! My dad.”

He grabbed me forcefully by my shoulders, willing me to look at him. “Listen to me, _____. Are you listening? You’re not a . You’re not a . You’re ing critical, intelligent, sarcastic, witty, funny, compassionate and independent. You’ll never be a or anything similar to a . Did you hear me? Everyone has their secrets and their screw ups but that doesn’t make anyone a . ”

I stared at him, stunned from his little harangue.

His voice was softer when he spoke again. “ is just some term people use to put others down.”

I blinked, running his words through my head. There was something underneath everything he was saying, something that told me that he understood how it felt. He understood me.

I kissed him.

It wasn’t an earnest, electrified, -driven, overzealous touch of the lips that had no distinct meaning to it. Every time I had pressed my lips to his, I admired how they felt against mine. Now, there was no fiery, vehemence to it. It was gentle, every unspoken word he wished to deliver to me compacted in that mere connection. It drained me of my hurt, as if he pulled the ache away. The kiss wasn’t unnatural as it was before.

It felt horrifically right.