He looked at himself in the mirror, pleased with the sight of his body thinning out. There were still definite deformities caused by obesity, but he noticed that his shirts were fitting just a bit better. Ryeowook glanced at the toilet and swallowed hard.

It was still an uncomfortable, slightly guilty ritual. Some weeks had passed since that moment he shared with Hyungsik and ever since then things were slowly progressing between them. In Ryeowook’s mind, it had everything to do with his sudden weight loss. Otherwise, why would Hyungsik suddenly bring up things like love?

What if he stopped what he was doing? Would things stop with Hyungsik as well? Ryeowook couldn’t help but fear such things. Yes, he believed that his friend would always be his friend. But how coincidental was it that the night he started losing weight was the same night things changed for them? Ryeowook didn’t want things to revert back if he started gaining pounds.

It just wasn’t a risk he was willing to take.

His hands curled into fists, tears pricking his eyes. Slowly, Ryeowook kneeled down before the toilet and roughly shoved two fingers down his throat. The shower was pouring down as always, obscuring the sounds of his painful sobbing and gagging.

It’s all to keep him…it’s all just to keep him…

Ryeowook blinked back tears, fingers shaking as they gripped the floor and bathtub.

Sunlight streamed through his bedroom window, bringing with it a warm breeze. Yawning, Ryeowook sat up and stretched, enjoying how light he felt. He went through his morning routine, finishing it off by grabbing his book bag and heading downstairs to see his mom making dumplings for breakfast.

“Oh, what’s the special occasion?” Ryeowook asked, excited at the prospect of eating.

“No reason,” his mother responded, “invite Hyungsik over. He likes dumplings too, right?”

“Ah, I’ll be right back then.” He headed out the front door, hurrying across the small driveway to his friend’s house. Ryeowook knocked a few times, waiting in jittery excitement for someone to answer the door.

A minute or so passed before the door creaked open. Hyungsik stood on the other side, his shirt missing and his eyes blearily half-shut. “Hmm?” he grunted.

“Why are you still asleep?” Ryeowook laughed, pushing his way inside and pulling his friend up the stairs. “You need to get ready. My umma made dumplings this morning and we have an early morning assembly today too.”

“What time is it?” he grumbled, allowing the older boy to pull him around. Hyungsik felt a toothbrush being shoved into his mouth and then a hand forcing him to curl his own fingers around the handle. Keeping his eyes shut, Hyungsik brushed his teeth, leaning heavily on the counter.

Ryeowook checked his watch and then said, “We have to head out in half an hour.”

Two tired eyes opened to glare at the male. Hyungsik finished brushing his teeth and spit into the sink, rinsing his mouth out as well. “You woke me up that early?” he complained, scrubbing his face clean of sleep and oils. “Jerk…”

“Sorry, dongsaeng,” Ryeowook chuckled, patting the boy’s back softly, “hurry up though! There’s a yummy breakfast waiting for you!”

Hyungsik muttered incoherently, but complied nonetheless. It took five minutes for him to be ready and relatively awake. Ryeowook was waiting by the front door when Hyungsik trudged down the staircase. “Alright, let’s go,” he sighed, cracking a faint smile as he slung one arm around the older boy.

“Mm!” Ryeowook nodded, grinning.

Breakfast flew by without much of a hitch. Ryeowook was just about to head upstairs to finish his morning routine, but then stopped himself when he felt Hyungsik grabbing his hand. The latter dragged him towards the door, talking about things like being late and such. Ryeowook swallowed painfully, his throat burning with need.

The feeling of being bloated wouldn’t go away. Ryeowook trailed after Hyungsik helplessly. Why couldn’t the male understand that he was feeling hideous in that moment? Then again, of course he wouldn’t notice. It was a good thing that he didn’t notice. Ryeowook had an inkling that Hyungsik would profusely disapprove and tell him once again that he was “beautiful”. Certainly that was just him being nice. No one wanted to be with a fat person, especially someone as athletic and built and tall as Hyungsik.

They were running down the street and Ryeowook was almost positive that his breakfast wasn’t going to stay down. A part of him was relieved, but the other part was scared. What if Hyungsik noticed something was off? Then everything would crumble right before his eyes. Ryeowook wouldn’t be able to keep losing weight at that accelerated speed. In fact, he would probably start gaining pounds again and then…and then…

Abruptly, Ryeowook covered his mouth, veering off the road to grab at a nearby trash can. He hurled into the mess, coughing raggedly. Indeed, relief washed over him at the emptiness beginning to fill him.

From behind, Hyungsik had stopped walking. Hurrying over to his friend, he patted his back in concern. “Man, do you have a stomach bug? It’s not like you to throw up this much.”

Ryeowook mumbled out an excuse before backing away from the trash and wiping his mouth. Uncapping his water bottle, he rinsed his mouth out and spit back into the dump. “I’m fine,” he added, voice hoarse from lingering acid.

“Alright…,” Hyungsik said skeptically, eyes roaming over his friend’s state. He shook off the curiosity and quickly nodded towards the road again. “We should really pick up the pace. There’s not much time left.”

Agreeing silently, Ryeowook headed off with his friend.