I failed it, it was one of the most difficult test that I’ve ever had to take so far. Not because of the test itself but because I couldn’t concentrate. All I could think of was Kai and the possible reasons for the break up and I could only think of one reason. I hoped that I managed to get enough points to pass the test at least.

Kai was already there waiting for me when I arrived. We were standing outside the banquet hall which was the place that I met Kai for the first time. Kai’s real name is Kim Jongin but everyone calls him by his nickname. He is a dancer, to be more precise he is ballet dancer which also happens to be his major. He is one of the most talented dancers I’ve seen in my life and the first time we met was when he was performing at the anual KHU festival. I was one of the arrangers of the evening banquet cause that’s one of the things we help arranging as hotel management students. Kai caught my attention and somehow I caught his attention too. Not long after that we started dating. We almost made it one year, we’ll be having our one year anniversary in less than 3 weeks if the relationship would have lasted.

Now he is standing in front of me and looked at me with an expression that I found very familiar...it was guilt. I was just standing there staring at him silently waiting for an explanation. At last he started talking..

“I feel that we need to take a break from each other. I have too many things going on in my life right now and I’m practicing very hard for the performance at the anual festival. You know that this could be my chance to fulfill my dream. The producer of a big musical is going to be there looking for performers and I really want to be a part of it. I don’t want to break up maybe just take a break...”

I was furious cause I know that he was lying. It is true that he has to practice for the annual festival and I of course support him to a 100% but the practice is not the reason. The reason was that his parents didn’t want us to be together cause they think that their son is spending too much time with me and that he has lost his focus on dancing. The truth is that Kai injured his back six month ago when he was practicing. He has always been very careful, what happened was an accident. He didn’t tell his parents cause he didn’t want to worry them and he also know that they have very high hopes for him. The doctor told him to not practice for a at least two weeks and I agreed to keep it a secret from his parents. But somehow they found out and since I knew that Kai was already blaiming himself for the injury I took the blame. They thought that it was me already from the start and I didn’t say anything to defend myself. They haven’t liked me ever since but I didn’t care cause both me and Kai know the truth and that was enough for me. But now..

“You can stop lying Kai, I know it’s your parents. What have they said now to make you take this decision? I thought that we agreed on to never let your parents come in between us. Why?”

“It’s not them..it’s me. I want to take a break..”

I can’t believe that he is still lying straight up my face....fine,  I give up.

I took a deep breath.

“I’m sorry I can’t take this anymore, you’re still lying to me even at this moment. I would never have thought that you would actually listen to them and do this to me. Let’s just break up..no breaks or anything..let’s us go separate ways from now on and don’t worry, I won’t tell your parents what really happened. It’s not like they’ll believe me anyway even if I did tell them. Bye Kai”

Even though I acted cool my heart still hurted so much. I left him standing there wishing for him to run after me and say that he has changed his mind, but he didn’t. When I turned around he was already gone. So this is what our relationship was worth to him.

It suddenly started to rain.

Are you kidding me. Raining at this time, are you crying for me? Or do you want me to cry too?

I started crying cause I couldn’t hold back the tears anymore. I walked in the rain crying and looking for a place to shield myself. I know where to go, it’s a place I usually go when I want to be alone and the internet wi-fi signal is really strong there too for some reason. I haven’t seen people go there probably because it’s a little bit off and kind of hard to find if you don’t know the way. I ran there as fast as I could with tears streaming down my face. It was a good thing that it was raining cause I could blame it on that if someone saw me and asked. When I finally reached the place I was surprised to see that someone was already sitting on the bench that I usually sit on. At first I couldn’t see who it was because of the rain and the tears but as I got closer I finally recognized those big bright eyes that were now looking back at me.

“It’s you again! Are you here because of the rain too? I was exploring the Campus when it suddenly started raining, luckily I found this place.”

He smiled at me and I tried to force a smile back but I’m sure that it didn’t look good. And I didn’t answer him cause I was afraid that he could hear from my voice that I was crying. I was about to leave when he made a gesture with his hand to come sit beside him. I hesitated but it would look like I was avoiding him if I just left and the rain was still pouring down. I went to sit beside him but I still didn’t say anything and I kept looking straight so that he wouldn’t be able to see my face.

“Are you crying?”

His sudden question startled me.

That’s just great he noticed it. What should I do..I’ll just pretend that it’s the rain, hope he falls for it. I hope that my voice sounds normal..

“What? No...it’s raindrops not tears. My eyes are red because the raindrops hit my eyes.”

“Oh is that so.”

Phew..I think he bought it. Gosh this is so embarrassing. Can’t it stop raining soon I want to leave.

“Hey you ~, look at this.”

I turned my head and looked at Kyungsoo. The face I saw cracked me up and I burst out laughing. He had his lower eye part pulled down with the index fingers and he was smiling at the same time which made him look ridiculous.

“I’m happy to see that it worked.”

I stopped laughing and smiled at him. Somehow the painful feeling in my heart had almost disappeared and I felt somehow relieved. Like something really heavy had been lifted off my chest.

“So you did see that I was unhappy afterall. Thank you! I feel much better now, really.”

We started talking and we didn’t even notice when the rain stopped. I don’t why but I felt very comfortable being with Kyungsoo, like we have been friends for a very long time. We talked about everything and actually found out that we had lots of things in common. Like how we both liked cooking, had similar taste when it comes to food and we had similar intrerests too. We talked to the point were I could no longer feel any pain in my heart and it felt like the break up with Kai happened a long time ago. I don’t what it was with Kyungsoo but I have never felt like this talking to a stranger before.

This was the beginning of our friendship.

I didn’t see Kai at all the next couple of days. I spent my free time showing Kyungsoo around the Campus and planning for the KHU anual festival banquet. Since we were going to have people performing again I asked Kyungsoo if he could sing at the banquet since he was studying at the music department majoring in voice. He said that he would think about it cause he wasn’t sure that he was ready to perform at such a big event yet and it was kind of a short notice. Too bad if he decided not to cause I really wanted to hear him sing. I told him to come to the meeting we were having on Monday morning if he was interested, which was in three days.

~ O ~