It had been months since Yong Guk and he had talked.
Argued more than talked after all and Zelo kept trying to persuade the leader to talk things over and Youngjae did the same to him but they both knew better and it wasn’t what they needed.
Because any talk would end up in another fight since that was just who they were.
There was no option for them to just sit down and talk things over because they both were too proud to ever admit their wrongs to one another.
And Himchan knew Yong Guk wasn’t going to forgive him for laying his hands on Zelo and Himchan didn’t want his forgiveness either since it would mean for him to acknowledge his mistake. 
Himchan knew there was no use in telling Yong Guk how much he’d hurt him because Himchan himself didn’t know how to put his feelings into words.
There were no examples he could name and even if there were it would end up with them pushing the guilt from one to the other.
He didn’t want a conversation where Yong Guk would accuse him for taking advantage of the maknae and he would counter by saying Yong Guk had ignored him and then the leader would deny it and he would get angry again.
And they’d go on and on like that, blaming each other for things that couldn’t be changed anymore.
So they never talked.
Not even casually and a few months passed by like nothing.
They tried to ignore all the that happened, the fact that their friendship had cracked and shattered.
That was all they could do, trying to forget all the pain and hatred, ignoring them as if nothing ever happened. 

They were standing in row backstage and he watched Yong Guk, watched how he looked at Zelo and he saw his deep affection, he saw how utterly happy his leader was just from looking at the maknae.
And when Zelo turned around and smiled at the leader Himchan suddenly felt stupid.
Because those two made a whole and because it was different from what Yong Guk and he had had.

It was similar, but different.

Not better, not worse.

And Himchans stomach cramped when the memories of the past months came crashing down on him.
He wanted to slap his own face, he wanted to slap Yong Guks too.
His hand reached out, and he brushed Yong Guks hand a little.
The leader looked at him, astonished and Himchan looked straight in his face and his mouth formed the words he’d thought he’d never hear himself utter.
“I’m sorry.”
Yong Guk looked confused for a moment and then a smile graced his face and his elbow nudged into his side.
“Me too.” He said eyes focused on his face again, for the very first time in what had seemed like forever.  
Memories of past times flash through Himchans mind.
Of both of them laughing and chatting before and he lost track of his thoughts when they reached the past months and how they had fought and yelled.
Everything seemed wrapped in a thick mist as he tried to determine the whys and hows but it didn’t matter because Yong Guk smiled at him.
The sight of his big, gummy smile made Himchans eyes feel heavy and he want to cry, out of happiness, pure happiness though he’d never admit that.
Yong Guks hand ruffled his hair and Himchans shot him a deathly glare for destroying his hair only seconds before they’d hit the stage.
Yong Guk laughed a little and Himchan joined in and then he was certain they were going to go back to being Yong Guk and Himchan.
They still needed a talk, maybe they didn’t but they were back on track.
Just like that because they were friends after all and they had only forgotten about that fact for a while. 

(Note: We're done! I'm sorry if you're disappointed with the last chapters...I know this one is more of a drabble than a chapter...Links to additional oneshots on the next page! I hope you enjoyed reading.)