Zelo had matured. 

In fact during the short amount of time that had passed Zelo had matured a lot.

Yong Guks eyes roamed over the others body.
Zelo lay stretched across the black old, leather sofa, his hand hanging off the seat, a blanket loosely wrapped around his waist.
He noticed his muscles had gotten a little more defined due to the daily workouts.
His face hadn’t changed at all though; it was still that of a teenager, the silky white skin now framed by a mob of pink locks.
Still even if not very noticeable on the outside, Zelo as a person had grown so much, he couldn’t help but feel proud of his maknae.
The young boy was even more determined than he had been before when it came to practice.
He would pull all-nighters to get a choreography done until it engraved in his bones and every move was executed perfectly.
He was taking extra lessons in vocal training and he’d started studying English, books were piling up everywhere in the small dorm.
His complains on training and the lack of free time had decreased as well.
The youngest seemed to be working harder than anyone else in the group.

Zelos eyelids twitched in his sleep and one of his lashes dropped on his cheek, the little black crescent laying noticeably on the white surface.
Yong Guk put down his notebook and bend towards the younger boy, his fingertips brushed off the lash softly enough to not wake Zelo from his nap.
He sighed as he dropped back into his chair picking up his notebook again to randomly scribble down lyrics.

They had grown distant but neither of them ever mentioned it.
There were no talks, no explanations.
No words of defense or even a single apology.
They just kept silent about it and it was eating him up inside.
He had been the one who had decided to end what they had without leaving the other with a clear reason.
Now finally he realized he’d made a mistake.
Whenever they got to be together he could feel the question lingering in the air.
“Why?”
He wondered if Zelo actually felt it too.
Deep inside he knew he owned him an answer.
But there was just no way he could start this, not after he’d been quiet for too long.
Not after his reasons had become so void to himself.

He looked up from his notebook.
Zelo was still lying on the couch, sound asleep.
It was about 2am probably and the maknae had dropped dead on the couch about an hour ago, the TV still lightening the room.
Actually Yong Guk had just wanted to get himself a glass of water and then go back to the laptop, to work on a song that would hopefully make it onto their new album.
Instead he’d ended up sitting in the chair next to Zelo.
He tried to focus on the TV at first but his eyes wandered off to the silhouette that was stretched on the couch every now and then so he decided to grab his notebook instead and concentrate on getting his thoughts onto paper.
Unfortunately he wasn’t getting far with it.
Anything he tried to put into words ended up as a tangled mess inside his head before he even got the chance to put his pen onto the paper.
So after another 20 minutes he’d stopped to hover the pen over blank pages and set his eyes on the pink haired boy instead.
It was rare for him to really look at Zelo these days so he tried to take everything in, from his slim figure to his pink curls, from his nose to his fully pouty lips.
A small fragile smile formed on his lips.
His young friend looked so peaceful and untroubled, so different to how he looked when he was awake.  

Zelo was still being awkward around him, sometimes slightly more than he had been before and it always drew Yong Guks attention.
He had stopped the occasional attempts to touch him, stopped to brush his hand against his while walking, and stopped to look at him with affectionate eyes that seemed to plead him to take back on his decision.
And yet his glances had gotten more intense than ever.
His eyes were basically sinking into Yong Guks bones reproaching and bitter but still so sad and hurt it was hard not to notice.
It was a painful glance.
Before Yong Guk had been the one avoiding him but now it seemed to be the other way around.
In front of the cameras they were still pretending well.
Nobody ever noticed the tension between them, the open question that cut through the air.
No one ever notice Yong Guks heartbeat increasing whenever Zelo smiled or laughed.

Yong Guk sighed.
He shook his head as he tried to erase the image of Zelos eyes from his mind.
He massaged his temples as if to rub off his memories.
It was like something had been taken from him that he hadn’t been capable of claiming his own before.
His throat felt dry, his hands sweaty as he sank into the conflict that was battling inside his chest.

Back then he had known he wasn’t in love, he still was sure he hadn’t been but something had changed since then.
Maybe this was what people meant by “You never realize what you got until it’s gone?”
It was just ed up.

The more distanced they grew the more restless he got.
It wasn’t right.
Everything wasn’t how it was supposed to be.
He wasn’t supposed to be sad or disappointed whenever Zelo left the room when it was only the two of them.
He wasn’t supposed to grow fond of the other and he hated himself for having that change of heart.
After he had been so cruel to abandon the younger boy who was he to demand him to come back?

A door swung open and a drowsy Youngjae stumbled into the hallway and towards the kitchen.
Yong Guk heard something that was probably Youngjae bumping against the table.
The sound was shortly followed by a loudly exclaimed “!”
The figure on the couch growled in displeasure and wiggled into the blanket.
His lips pouty and eyebrows furrowed as he tried to maintain a comfortable sleeping position.
Another grumpy noise and he sat up, sleep drunk.
Youngjae stuck his head through the door smiling apologetic before tip toeing back into his room as if he hadn’t already woken the young up.
Young Guks eyes wandered over the others figure, his pink hair was messy, eyes half-lid, lips curved into a sleepy pout.
He looked cute.
The younger yawned and cracked his neck and that’s when he noticed the leader sitting beside him.

Zelo eyed him, astonishment flashing in his eyes.
He almost felt the questions raining in on him, why was he sitting there, how long had he sat there already, was he there because of him?
Yong Guk felt his cheeks burning up the second their eyes met.
He broke their eye contact that instant, grabbing his notebook off the table.
“It’s late Zelo you should go sleep in your bed.” He said with a dry and cold voice, just a hyung scolding his maknae.
Zelos face hardened, the thin expression of faint hope vanishing from his handsome features.
He was sad and probably disappointed.
“Sure hyung.”
Yong Guk could see Zelo grinding his teeth as he pressed the words through his lips, a pinch of phony friendliness in his tone.
He got off the couch and made his way out of the room dragging the blanked over the floor.
Yong Guk sighed.

This was not the way he was supposed to behave around Zelo, always making him feel bad instead of treating him well.
The younger probably knew he had been sitting there quietly watching him but he was just too proud to admit it.
He rather got him mad than to reveal he was seeking his presence.

However he couldn’t change his attitude no matter how much he wished to.
He’d always liked Zelo, as in like, as in someone he treasured, as in someone he liked to stick around with, as in a friend who was very dear to him.
Even when he’d started their little excursion, what else was he supposed to call it now, he had always seen him as nothing more than a very close, very precious friend.
But now that something inside of him had started to rebel against that view he was more than confused.
Now that he caught himself wanting to be the one that made Zelo laugh, the one that made him smile it all became a mess inside his head.
He wasn’t going to jump to conclusions, not going to say he fell for the younger boy but he knew there was something more to how  felt about him now.
And even if he accepted it, he knew better than to run to Zelo to tell him about his newly discovered emotions.
Because of that he just couldn’t treat him differently.
He wanted that glance back, the one that made him feel all of Zelos affection, that was so intense that is send shivers down his spine.
But what if it was only a brief mood?
What if he actually started to get tired of it again once those eyes revived that glance that was able to pierce his heart?
He would end up betraying Zelo again and that was a cruel game he wasn’t eager to play.  

Still he wanted to do something, whatever it was to get back to how they had been. 

(Note: I'm sorry for any mistakes in tenses, grammar, vocabulary etc. I tried to fix everything but I was eager to update so I probably missed some...I hope you enjoy the 1st chapter and please leave a comment telling me what you think of it! It will probably take a while till I can upload chapter 2 since I have to meet some deadlines at school but I will try to update asap I just don wanna leave you with less than 1500 words per chapter ^^; )